1 00:00:01,091 --> 00:00:02,673 Morty, hurry! 2 00:00:02,801 --> 00:00:05,088 Return the Truth Tortoise! 3 00:00:05,220 --> 00:00:07,336 Morty, whatever you do, don't drop the Truth Tortoise! 4 00:00:07,472 --> 00:00:08,507 Also really important, 5 00:00:08,640 --> 00:00:10,472 whatever you do, don't look into its eyes! 6 00:00:10,601 --> 00:00:13,138 I-I did look at it, Rick! I've been looking at it! 7 00:00:13,270 --> 00:00:14,305 Now you're gonna know everything, Morty! 8 00:00:14,438 --> 00:00:16,145 Good job! Way to go! You fucked everything up! 9 00:00:18,442 --> 00:00:20,604 It's in my head! 10 00:00:20,736 --> 00:00:21,567 Ah! 11 00:00:26,116 --> 00:00:28,949 Oh, geez, I-I can't get that Truth Tortoise out of my head. 12 00:00:29,077 --> 00:00:30,863 Yeah, I told you not to look into its eyes. 13 00:00:30,996 --> 00:00:32,907 Hey, Morty, let's watch some interdimensional cable. 14 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:33,905 Remember how we used to do that? 15 00:00:34,041 --> 00:00:35,702 Rick, I can't - I can't go on. 16 00:00:35,834 --> 00:00:36,949 I-I can't go on like this 17 00:00:37,085 --> 00:00:38,496 with the Truth Tortoise shit in my head. 18 00:00:38,629 --> 00:00:39,710 I-I wish you could just - 19 00:00:39,838 --> 00:00:42,000 Erase the memory from your mind? 20 00:00:42,132 --> 00:00:43,839 How did you know I was gonna say that? 21 00:00:43,967 --> 00:00:45,503 Come on, Morty, come with me. 22 00:00:45,636 --> 00:00:47,752 After you. 23 00:00:49,181 --> 00:00:50,592 What the hell is this? 24 00:00:50,724 --> 00:00:52,306 This, Morty, is my archive 25 00:00:52,434 --> 00:00:54,596 of all the experiences you've begged me to remove 26 00:00:54,728 --> 00:00:57,015 from your life, lest you go insane. 27 00:00:57,147 --> 00:01:00,731 I call them Morty's Mind Blowers. 28 00:01:00,859 --> 00:01:03,100 And we'll be doing this instead of interdimensional cable. 29 00:01:35,102 --> 00:01:37,093 How long have I been asking you to remove memories? 30 00:01:37,229 --> 00:01:39,436 Since the first time your mind was blown. 31 00:01:39,564 --> 00:01:40,929 Ahh, here it is. 32 00:01:41,066 --> 00:01:42,352 Classic. 33 00:01:42,484 --> 00:01:43,724 There's no dust on it because 34 00:01:43,860 --> 00:01:45,350 this isn't the first time we've done this. 35 00:01:45,487 --> 00:01:49,321 - What?I - I call this one "Moonspiracy"! 36 00:01:54,996 --> 00:01:57,533 Huh, wow. That's incredible. 37 00:01:59,084 --> 00:01:59,994 What the heck? 38 00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:04,082 Morty, do you realize how ridiculous that sounds? 39 00:02:04,214 --> 00:02:05,329 Yeah, pretty crazy story, Morty. 40 00:02:05,465 --> 00:02:06,296 Are you serious? 41 00:02:06,425 --> 00:02:08,962 Half the crap we've seen, and you think that sounds crazy? 42 00:02:09,094 --> 00:02:10,676 I've been to 300 versions of Earth's moon, 43 00:02:10,804 --> 00:02:12,636 including this one, and I've never seen signs 44 00:02:12,764 --> 00:02:14,721 of a "regular dude," as you describe him, 45 00:02:14,850 --> 00:02:15,715 hanging out up there. 46 00:02:15,851 --> 00:02:17,808 It's probably just a smudge on the lens. 47 00:02:17,936 --> 00:02:21,304 Smudge on the lens? Smudge on the lens? 48 00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:23,477 I know the difference between a man threatening me 49 00:02:23,608 --> 00:02:25,519 and a smudge on the goddamn lens, Summer! 50 00:02:25,652 --> 00:02:27,484 Morty, calm down! Are you feeling okay? 51 00:02:27,612 --> 00:02:29,353 I'm fine! 52 00:02:29,489 --> 00:02:30,979 So sensitive. 53 00:02:33,285 --> 00:02:34,821 Kids, I'd like to introduce you all 54 00:02:34,953 --> 00:02:37,866 to our new guidance counselor, Mr. Lunas. 55 00:02:37,998 --> 00:02:40,365 I look forward to helping guide you all 56 00:02:40,500 --> 00:02:42,616 towards a brighter future. 57 00:02:42,753 --> 00:02:45,120 I believe every student should... 58 00:02:45,255 --> 00:02:47,542 shoot for the moon. 59 00:02:51,636 --> 00:02:53,843 Got you now, you son of a bitch. 60 00:02:57,309 --> 00:02:58,390 What's this? 61 00:02:58,518 --> 00:03:01,010 Proof that Mr. Lunas isn't who he says he is! 62 00:03:01,146 --> 00:03:02,181 He's not a guidance counselor? 63 00:03:02,314 --> 00:03:05,147 I-I assume he's qualified to be one. Who isn't? 64 00:03:05,275 --> 00:03:08,358 But he also lives on the moon. 65 00:03:08,487 --> 00:03:10,273 Okay. 66 00:03:10,405 --> 00:03:12,863 Hmm. Is that it? 67 00:03:12,991 --> 00:03:14,356 Is he doing anything to hurt anyone? 68 00:03:14,493 --> 00:03:15,983 Oh, he's up to something. 69 00:03:16,119 --> 00:03:18,406 I think I understand. 70 00:03:18,538 --> 00:03:20,449 "Up to something," "lives on the moon." 71 00:03:20,582 --> 00:03:21,822 Okay, I'll talk to him. 72 00:03:34,012 --> 00:03:35,047 What did he say? 73 00:03:35,180 --> 00:03:37,171 Denied the moon stuff, but that's what pedophiles do. 74 00:03:37,307 --> 00:03:38,513 They deny. It's their bread and butter. 75 00:03:38,642 --> 00:03:39,882 - Pedophile? - You don't think so? 76 00:03:40,018 --> 00:03:41,258 I thought the moon thing might have been code. 77 00:03:41,394 --> 00:03:43,385 No, he's literally from the moon! 78 00:03:43,522 --> 00:03:44,603 Well, you saw him react. 79 00:03:44,731 --> 00:03:47,268 Moon or not, that dude likes 'em young. 80 00:03:53,365 --> 00:03:55,276 Gordon Lunas was a good Marine. 81 00:03:55,408 --> 00:03:57,649 We don't know what drove him to take his own life, 82 00:03:57,786 --> 00:03:59,618 but we want to remember the good things. 83 00:03:59,746 --> 00:04:00,986 Like how, from a certain angle, 84 00:04:01,122 --> 00:04:04,456 some people would say he looked like a smudge. 85 00:04:09,506 --> 00:04:10,996 Oh, my God, what have I done? 86 00:04:11,132 --> 00:04:12,497 What have I done? 87 00:04:13,343 --> 00:04:15,459 Jesus, I made that guy kill himself! 88 00:04:15,595 --> 00:04:16,676 Only in a literal sense. 89 00:04:16,805 --> 00:04:19,923 Here's one I call "Morty's Menagerie." 90 00:04:20,058 --> 00:04:21,093 They don't all have titles, though. 91 00:04:21,226 --> 00:04:22,716 It's not a "Simpsons" Halloween special, 92 00:04:22,853 --> 00:04:26,312 more like a clip show made of clips you never saw! 93 00:04:27,649 --> 00:04:29,185 I can't believe we got put into a menagerie. 94 00:04:29,317 --> 00:04:31,354 So this guy collects living beings? 95 00:04:31,486 --> 00:04:33,068 Yeah, you know like commemorative plates, 96 00:04:33,196 --> 00:04:34,152 but less off-putting. 97 00:04:34,281 --> 00:04:36,318 You'll get it when you're still actively dating in your 405. 98 00:04:36,449 --> 00:04:38,315 Assess this with cold indifference, 99 00:04:38,451 --> 00:04:39,282 you veiny-headed prick! 100 00:04:39,411 --> 00:04:41,618 - Hey, keep it down! 101 00:04:41,746 --> 00:04:43,362 Just our luck, menagerie beneath 102 00:04:43,498 --> 00:04:45,409 the "boulder people" of Granitor Seven. 103 00:04:45,542 --> 00:04:46,577 I can't take it anymore, Rick! 104 00:04:46,710 --> 00:04:48,166 - Relax, Morty! 105 00:04:48,295 --> 00:04:50,627 I can't relax! R-R-Rick, we — we gotta get outta here! 106 00:04:50,755 --> 00:04:52,291 I don't care what it takes! Anything! 107 00:04:52,424 --> 00:04:53,960 - Anything? - Anything! 108 00:04:54,092 --> 00:04:55,799 All right, well, you're gonna have to take off your shirt. 109 00:04:55,927 --> 00:04:57,793 Not yet. I'll tell you when. 110 00:05:02,684 --> 00:05:04,391 Dear God. 111 00:05:04,519 --> 00:05:05,975 What? 112 00:05:06,104 --> 00:05:08,391 The signal turned out to be - 113 00:05:08,523 --> 00:05:10,355 there's no other way to put it — 114 00:05:10,483 --> 00:05:12,190 - Instructions. - For? 115 00:05:12,319 --> 00:05:15,232 A vehicle, sir, an interstellar vehicle. 116 00:05:15,363 --> 00:05:17,980 We'll need a pilot. I wonder if there's a volunteer. 117 00:05:19,075 --> 00:05:22,284 Oh, the schematics specify a second, smaller pilot. 118 00:05:22,412 --> 00:05:24,403 I mean, they really specify smaller. 119 00:05:24,539 --> 00:05:26,871 They have to be exactly 5'3". 120 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:29,458 Chang, you may have majored in Liberal Arts, 121 00:05:29,586 --> 00:05:31,873 but I think you're about to make history. 122 00:05:34,299 --> 00:05:35,414 Primary systems, check. 123 00:05:35,550 --> 00:05:37,507 Auxiliary systems, check. 124 00:05:37,636 --> 00:05:39,047 See you soon. 125 00:05:42,599 --> 00:05:43,964 Okay, now. 126 00:05:45,852 --> 00:05:46,762 Greetings. 127 00:05:46,895 --> 00:05:47,885 You're — You look... 128 00:05:48,021 --> 00:05:50,479 We've possessed forms your mind can accept. 129 00:05:50,607 --> 00:05:52,814 Here are some customary clothing gifts. 130 00:05:52,943 --> 00:05:54,525 Please, put them on. 131 00:05:54,653 --> 00:05:56,769 - May we? - Of course, yes. 132 00:05:56,905 --> 00:05:58,361 We followed your instructions. 133 00:05:58,490 --> 00:06:01,073 We have so much to learn from you. 134 00:06:01,201 --> 00:06:02,612 I know, right? 135 00:06:08,667 --> 00:06:11,455 Hey, how come I was able to see those other people's memories? 136 00:06:11,586 --> 00:06:13,247 I-I wouldn't have been around for that. 137 00:06:13,380 --> 00:06:14,870 Yeah, sometimes I gotta do a little editing, Morty. 138 00:06:15,006 --> 00:06:16,167 It helps the mind blowers 139 00:06:16,299 --> 00:06:17,881 play a little bit better upon revisiting. 140 00:06:18,009 --> 00:06:21,218 I call this one "The Whole Enchilada. 141 00:06:21,346 --> 00:06:23,678 Here, Morty, this'll make your urine drinkable. 142 00:06:23,807 --> 00:06:25,889 Now can we keep shopping? 143 00:06:26,017 --> 00:06:27,553 I am Zikzak. 144 00:06:27,686 --> 00:06:29,973 Ah, shit, Morty, get behind me. It's a fucking alien overlord! 145 00:06:30,105 --> 00:06:31,766 It's okay. Here. 146 00:06:31,898 --> 00:06:33,229 Oh, I misjudged. 147 00:06:33,358 --> 00:06:35,941 "I am Floop Floopian. Please kill me." 148 00:06:36,069 --> 00:06:36,934 That's right, Morty. 149 00:06:37,070 --> 00:06:39,687 The Floop Floopians achieve an eternal orgasmic afterlife, 150 00:06:39,823 --> 00:06:42,064 so long as they're killed by a great warrior. 151 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:43,986 I'm flattered, by the way. Thank you very much. 152 00:06:44,119 --> 00:06:45,450 So you're gonna kill him? 153 00:06:45,578 --> 00:06:47,285 Eh, let's get some lunch first. 154 00:06:51,668 --> 00:06:53,500 So, you want to get shot in the head, or — 155 00:06:53,628 --> 00:06:55,164 Well, as long as the wound is fatal, 156 00:06:55,296 --> 00:06:56,536 I don't really mind where you shoot me. 157 00:06:56,673 --> 00:06:58,084 Cool. I'm gonna go take a quick shit. 158 00:06:58,216 --> 00:07:00,708 Well, I gotta say. You know, I'm a little envious. 159 00:07:00,844 --> 00:07:02,801 Your species has an actual afterlife. 160 00:07:02,929 --> 00:07:05,091 - That's gotta be nice. - Wh-What do you mean? 161 00:07:05,223 --> 00:07:07,885 Well, you know, here on Earth, w-we don't know what's going on. 162 00:07:08,018 --> 00:07:10,055 It must be nice for you guys to, you know, have that — 163 00:07:10,186 --> 00:07:12,473 have that proof's in the pudding, you know, evidence. 164 00:07:14,149 --> 00:07:17,517 Evidence? There's supposed to be evidence? 165 00:07:17,652 --> 00:07:20,110 Um, yeah, uh... 166 00:07:20,238 --> 00:07:24,197 Otherwise, how do you know if it's true? 167 00:07:26,453 --> 00:07:28,239 Wait, you don't... 168 00:07:29,456 --> 00:07:31,788 All right, so you want to do this here or outside? 169 00:07:33,251 --> 00:07:34,912 Run! 170 00:07:36,421 --> 00:07:37,707 I don't wanna die! 171 00:07:42,510 --> 00:07:44,797 Oh, God, it's all real! Oh, it hurts! 172 00:07:44,929 --> 00:07:46,419 Oh, I shouldn't have doubted it! 173 00:07:46,556 --> 00:07:48,422 I shouldn't have let you make me doubt it! 174 00:07:48,558 --> 00:07:51,141 Aah! I blame you, I blame you! 175 00:07:51,269 --> 00:07:53,385 But he said there wasn't any evidence! 176 00:07:53,521 --> 00:07:54,636 That was a ton of evidence! 177 00:07:54,773 --> 00:07:55,729 Well, silver lining. 178 00:07:55,857 --> 00:07:56,972 Now I know their religion's real. 179 00:07:57,108 --> 00:07:58,849 They have a hell, and it does not look good. 180 00:07:58,985 --> 00:08:00,896 I noticed you never finished your chimichanga, 181 00:08:01,029 --> 00:08:03,987 so I got some room for it now, if you know what I mean. 182 00:08:04,115 --> 00:08:05,401 Holy shit! 183 00:08:05,533 --> 00:08:07,570 How many of these are just horrible mistakes I've made? 184 00:08:07,702 --> 00:08:09,067 I mean, maybe I'd stop making so many 185 00:08:09,204 --> 00:08:10,319 if I let myself learn from them! 186 00:08:10,455 --> 00:08:12,366 Don't break your back creating a lesson, Morty. 187 00:08:12,499 --> 00:08:13,660 It's a freeform anthology. 188 00:08:13,792 --> 00:08:15,328 I'm getting annoyed you're not hearing that. 189 00:08:15,460 --> 00:08:17,417 As you can see around me, your mind's been blown 190 00:08:17,545 --> 00:08:21,630 countless times, and not always by yourself. 191 00:08:21,758 --> 00:08:23,374 Ah, shit, I don't even — 192 00:08:23,510 --> 00:08:24,750 This better not have been a good one. 193 00:08:24,886 --> 00:08:25,751 What is this? 194 00:08:25,887 --> 00:08:27,969 Great, "Booger AIDS," "AIDS Booger." 195 00:08:28,098 --> 00:08:29,588 I gotta start using real file names. 196 00:08:29,724 --> 00:08:31,306 In the meantime, enjoy a grab bag 197 00:08:31,434 --> 00:08:35,678 of mind blowers I call "Poop AIDS underscore copy." 198 00:08:35,814 --> 00:08:38,101 I'm not an unreasonable man, Beth Smith. 199 00:08:38,233 --> 00:08:40,349 I know children are everything to a mammal. 200 00:08:40,485 --> 00:08:42,852 I will spare one of their lives. 201 00:08:42,987 --> 00:08:44,819 You simply have to choose. 202 00:08:44,948 --> 00:08:47,235 Summer! Summer. 203 00:08:51,412 --> 00:08:52,368 You're not gonna believe this. 204 00:08:52,497 --> 00:08:54,079 I went to Phoebe instead of Titan. 205 00:08:54,207 --> 00:08:56,494 It's, like, hello, Saturn, after 10 moons, 206 00:08:56,626 --> 00:08:58,993 time to stop naming and start numbering, you know? 207 00:08:59,129 --> 00:09:01,370 What's — Wh-What's with you assholes? 208 00:09:01,506 --> 00:09:03,417 Morty, please, don't do this. 209 00:09:04,843 --> 00:09:06,129 Your Morty is gone! 210 00:09:06,261 --> 00:09:09,219 I am Voltamatron, Destroyer of Worlds! 211 00:09:09,347 --> 00:09:11,634 Grandpa Rick, there must be some scientific way to save him! 212 00:09:11,766 --> 00:09:13,757 Not scientific, but there may be a way. 213 00:09:13,893 --> 00:09:16,385 Morty, I know you're in there. It's me, your grandpa. 214 00:09:16,521 --> 00:09:18,137 I know I can be mean, but I love you, Morty. 215 00:09:18,273 --> 00:09:19,729 We all do. You gotta fight this thing. 216 00:09:19,858 --> 00:09:21,269 I know you can. You're stronger than all of us! 217 00:09:21,401 --> 00:09:23,733 Morty, it's Mom! We love you. You have to fight it! 218 00:09:23,862 --> 00:09:26,320 Come on, Morty! Fight that stupid worm thing! 219 00:09:26,447 --> 00:09:27,357 - We love you! 220 00:09:27,490 --> 00:09:28,696 We love you so much! 221 00:09:28,825 --> 00:09:30,407 Yes, Morty, come on, you're doing it! 222 00:09:30,535 --> 00:09:33,072 You're doing it! You're doing it! 223 00:09:35,039 --> 00:09:36,621 Should we pull it out? 224 00:09:36,749 --> 00:09:39,081 No, don't touch it. Just keep loving Morty! 225 00:09:39,210 --> 00:09:41,167 We still love you. 226 00:09:41,296 --> 00:09:43,253 But I do have a thing at 6:00. 227 00:09:43,381 --> 00:09:44,792 Oh, God, do I have to keep looking? 228 00:09:44,924 --> 00:09:47,086 Geez, Morty, come on, pinch it off already! 229 00:09:49,554 --> 00:09:52,216 Don't! Oh. God, sorry, Morty. I love you! 230 00:09:53,474 --> 00:09:55,056 God, is there going to be an intermission? 231 00:09:55,185 --> 00:09:57,847 Excuse me, but I ordered the large evil space worm. 232 00:09:57,979 --> 00:09:59,595 I know, it's like, is that a demon slug 233 00:09:59,731 --> 00:10:01,472 in your stomach, or are you just happy to — 234 00:10:01,608 --> 00:10:03,349 - Sorry! 235 00:10:03,484 --> 00:10:06,351 Well, I guess it's nice to know the whole family sucks! 236 00:10:06,487 --> 00:10:07,852 So if the blue ones are my fault 237 00:10:07,989 --> 00:10:10,481 and the purple ones are my family's, what are the red ones? 238 00:10:10,617 --> 00:10:13,109 Yeah, d-don't read into it, Morty! 239 00:10:14,579 --> 00:10:16,115 Ahh. 240 00:10:16,247 --> 00:10:18,614 Shit! We need to find shelter before the sunset, Morty. 241 00:10:18,750 --> 00:10:21,117 Venzenulon Nine has a night temperature of 300 below! 242 00:10:21,252 --> 00:10:23,163 We'll freeze, Morty! W-We'll be dead in seconds! 243 00:10:23,296 --> 00:10:25,378 I-I think I saw a cave over there. 244 00:10:25,506 --> 00:10:26,587 You've seen too many movies, Morty. 245 00:10:26,716 --> 00:10:29,458 A cave isn't gonna cut it. We're gonna have to use Beebo. 246 00:10:29,594 --> 00:10:32,131 Beebo led us to water! He's our friend! 247 00:10:32,263 --> 00:10:33,799 - He won't even feel it! - Oh, no, no! 248 00:10:37,435 --> 00:10:39,221 You wanna die, Morty? Get in Beebo! 249 00:10:39,354 --> 00:10:41,937 Oh, no, no! 250 00:10:42,065 --> 00:10:44,147 Brace for the ice limit. 251 00:10:44,275 --> 00:10:45,857 Here it comes! 252 00:10:50,031 --> 00:10:53,444 Wait, are we on Venzenulon Nine or Venzenulon Seven? 253 00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:56,902 Wait a minute. Why would I ask for that to be removed? 254 00:10:57,038 --> 00:10:58,699 Are the red ones stuff you wanted removed? 255 00:10:58,831 --> 00:11:01,368 Ooh, that's clever, Morty, but I don't use color to sort things 256 00:11:01,501 --> 00:11:03,492 because I'm not a mouse in a European children's book. 257 00:11:03,628 --> 00:11:05,369 Then why are all those pink ones by the liquor? 258 00:11:05,505 --> 00:11:07,337 Liquor? 259 00:11:14,722 --> 00:11:16,713 - Shit, that was close. - We lost Captain Sky. 260 00:11:16,849 --> 00:11:18,339 He gave his life for the uprising. 261 00:11:18,476 --> 00:11:20,638 Yeah. It really makes you think, huh, Morty? 262 00:11:20,770 --> 00:11:22,511 We should never take things for granite. 263 00:11:22,647 --> 00:11:24,308 - What? - I'm just saying. Life's short. 264 00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:25,805 We shouldn't take things for granite. 265 00:11:25,942 --> 00:11:27,853 - Are you saying "granite"? - Well, yeah. 266 00:11:27,986 --> 00:11:29,772 It's "granted," with a "D." 267 00:11:29,904 --> 00:11:32,646 Take things for granted. Did you actually think it was — 268 00:11:32,782 --> 00:11:34,523 Jesus Christ, Rick, 269 00:11:34,659 --> 00:11:36,775 what are you, a boulder — a rock person? 270 00:11:36,911 --> 00:11:38,242 How long have you been saying that wrong? 271 00:11:38,371 --> 00:11:39,361 Oh, you like that, huh? 272 00:11:39,497 --> 00:11:41,488 I b-b-bet that really blows your mind. 273 00:11:41,624 --> 00:11:42,955 I mean, yeah, it's kind of great. 274 00:11:43,084 --> 00:11:45,246 - You want me to erase it? - What, you can do that? 275 00:11:45,378 --> 00:11:47,369 - Ah, shit. 276 00:11:47,505 --> 00:11:49,746 I fucking knew it, you piece of shit! 277 00:11:49,882 --> 00:11:52,249 You - You - You're a fucking asshole. Rick! 278 00:11:52,385 --> 00:11:54,092 Take it easy, Morty. Come on. Just relax. 279 00:11:54,220 --> 00:11:55,585 No, I'm not gonna fucking relax! Come here! 280 00:11:55,722 --> 00:11:56,803 Let go of me, you little bitch! 281 00:11:56,931 --> 00:11:58,012 I'm gonna grab you by the scruff of your — 282 00:11:58,141 --> 00:12:00,803 - Take that! - Ohh! 283 00:12:00,935 --> 00:12:02,642 - Umm. - Umm. Uhh. 284 00:12:02,770 --> 00:12:04,181 - What — - What's going on? 285 00:12:04,314 --> 00:12:05,304 - Where am I? - Who are we? 286 00:12:05,440 --> 00:12:08,398 - Who am I? - I think I'm an adolescent boy. 287 00:12:08,526 --> 00:12:10,984 Huh, and I'm an elderly man. 288 00:12:11,112 --> 00:12:15,231 And we appear to be in some kind of secret confined space. 289 00:12:15,366 --> 00:12:17,903 - Yeah, umm... - Don't look at me like that. 290 00:12:18,036 --> 00:12:20,494 For all we know, you could be the fuckin' weirdo. 291 00:12:22,665 --> 00:12:24,576 Huh, these things are obviously storage units, 292 00:12:24,709 --> 00:12:26,450 and since we can't remember what went wrong, 293 00:12:26,586 --> 00:12:29,294 my guess is that the technology involves memory 294 00:12:29,422 --> 00:12:32,585 and that this thing on your head is designed to... 295 00:12:32,717 --> 00:12:34,299 Tell us the code, jagoff! 296 00:12:35,928 --> 00:12:37,259 It's pointless. He's stonewalling. 297 00:12:37,388 --> 00:12:39,595 Rick, if we don't unlock those vaccines, Earth dies! 298 00:12:39,724 --> 00:12:41,681 You know, it might be time to step up your interrogation! 299 00:12:41,809 --> 00:12:43,049 Not sure what you're implying, Morty, 300 00:12:43,186 --> 00:12:44,847 but some lines I don't cross. 301 00:12:44,979 --> 00:12:46,595 Yeah, well, I crossed every line I had 302 00:12:46,731 --> 00:12:49,143 when this bastard tried to kill Jessica! 303 00:12:51,319 --> 00:12:55,028 Okay, see those two fleshy sacs under his chin, Morty? 304 00:12:55,156 --> 00:12:56,146 Grab 'em. 305 00:12:56,824 --> 00:12:58,485 You remember the codes now? 306 00:12:58,618 --> 00:13:01,610 - Twist! 307 00:13:01,746 --> 00:13:04,078 Give us the codes, man! Twist harder, Morty! 308 00:13:04,207 --> 00:13:06,039 - Harder! 309 00:13:06,167 --> 00:13:08,374 Okay, let go, let go, let him breathe. 310 00:13:09,921 --> 00:13:11,207 He wants to make a deal. 311 00:13:11,339 --> 00:13:13,626 Half the codes now, half after you finish. 312 00:13:13,758 --> 00:13:15,544 But can we trust — Wait, what? 313 00:13:15,676 --> 00:13:16,632 F-Finish what? 314 00:13:16,761 --> 00:13:17,671 Y-You know. 315 00:13:17,804 --> 00:13:19,386 I thought I was torturing him! 316 00:13:19,514 --> 00:13:20,879 Oh, and this disappoints you? 317 00:13:21,015 --> 00:13:22,551 Do I tell him we don't have a deal, Morty? 318 00:13:22,683 --> 00:13:23,969 Because if we can kill our enemies 319 00:13:24,102 --> 00:13:27,094 but we can't jack them off, then how are we better than them? 320 00:13:27,230 --> 00:13:28,891 Well, what did you find out? 321 00:13:29,023 --> 00:13:30,605 We're partners, I guess, 322 00:13:30,733 --> 00:13:33,350 and we fight aliens, like "Men in Black"? 323 00:13:33,486 --> 00:13:35,068 "Men in Black,"Men in Black." 324 00:13:35,196 --> 00:13:36,607 I have "Men in Black 2" in here. 325 00:13:36,739 --> 00:13:38,229 So — So you get the general idea. 326 00:13:38,366 --> 00:13:39,777 Not quite. 327 00:13:39,909 --> 00:13:41,570 It's basically an endless string of callbacks to — 328 00:13:41,702 --> 00:13:44,820 All right, save it for YouTube. I'll keep looking for clues. 329 00:13:49,210 --> 00:13:50,075 What are you doing? 330 00:13:50,211 --> 00:13:51,497 You want your shelf level or not? 331 00:13:51,629 --> 00:13:54,212 And if I say yes, you're gonna provide that for me with that? 332 00:13:54,340 --> 00:13:55,375 Yes, see the bubble? 333 00:13:55,508 --> 00:13:57,090 I'm familiar with the bubble, Morty. 334 00:13:57,218 --> 00:13:59,004 I also dabble in precision, 335 00:13:59,137 --> 00:14:01,048 and if you think you can even approach it 336 00:14:01,180 --> 00:14:03,171 with your sad, naked, caveman eyeball 337 00:14:03,307 --> 00:14:05,674 and a bubble of fucking air, you're the reason this species 338 00:14:05,810 --> 00:14:07,175 is a failure, and it makes me angry! 339 00:14:07,311 --> 00:14:08,176 You're drunk. 340 00:14:08,312 --> 00:14:10,098 You want to put up a shelf, put up a shelf. 341 00:14:10,231 --> 00:14:12,347 You want to experience true level? 342 00:14:12,483 --> 00:14:15,100 - Do you? Y-yes. 343 00:14:23,995 --> 00:14:26,828 Ugh, all right, come on. 344 00:14:33,296 --> 00:14:35,003 Wow, it's so — 345 00:14:35,131 --> 00:14:39,250 Oh, oh, oh, oh, my God, oh, Christ, ooh, ooh, ooh, ahh. 346 00:14:39,385 --> 00:14:41,752 Oh, yeah, true level, bitch. 347 00:14:41,888 --> 00:14:44,095 Morty, come on, we're leaving for school. 348 00:14:44,223 --> 00:14:46,760 Oh, everything's crooked! Reality is poison! 349 00:14:46,893 --> 00:14:48,099 I want to go back! I hate this! 350 00:14:48,227 --> 00:14:49,308 - What's his deal? - Can't live like this! 351 00:14:49,437 --> 00:14:51,098 Shh, shh, shh, shh, Morty, Morty, Morty. 352 00:14:51,230 --> 00:14:52,971 Go to school, Summer. I'll go in Morty's memory 353 00:14:53,107 --> 00:14:54,518 and do a little — 354 00:14:54,650 --> 00:14:56,891 Lambs to the cosmic slaughter! 355 00:14:57,028 --> 00:14:58,268 Well? 356 00:14:58,404 --> 00:15:01,613 You seem to be in charge of what I get to remember. 357 00:15:01,741 --> 00:15:03,652 - Why? - Good question. 358 00:15:04,785 --> 00:15:07,402 Morty, I need darkness to prime these optical inductors. 359 00:15:07,538 --> 00:15:09,779 Hit the leftmost light switch by the door for me. 360 00:15:09,916 --> 00:15:10,781 The left. 361 00:15:18,132 --> 00:15:19,714 Okay, lights on. 362 00:15:21,219 --> 00:15:24,177 So, did I just hear three distinct light switch clicks? 363 00:15:24,305 --> 00:15:25,591 W-W-What do you mean? 364 00:15:25,723 --> 00:15:27,680 I feel like the three sounds I heard could be explained 365 00:15:27,808 --> 00:15:30,596 by an initial erroneous flipping of a switch on the right 366 00:15:30,728 --> 00:15:32,560 followed by a hasty, corrective flipping 367 00:15:32,688 --> 00:15:33,723 of the requested switch. 368 00:15:33,856 --> 00:15:36,518 Then during the resultant darkness and silence, a third, 369 00:15:36,651 --> 00:15:39,609 shameful unflipping of the initially flipped switch. 370 00:15:39,737 --> 00:15:41,523 Is my assessment accurate? 371 00:15:41,656 --> 00:15:44,990 Yeah, that's — that's basically how — how it all shaked out. 372 00:15:45,117 --> 00:15:48,235 - I'm sorry. - Ugh. All right, come on. 373 00:15:48,371 --> 00:15:50,533 - What? - Come on! 374 00:16:03,886 --> 00:16:06,218 - Grab a shovel. 375 00:16:06,347 --> 00:16:07,462 W-What is - 376 00:16:07,598 --> 00:16:09,589 Grab a shovel! 377 00:16:11,894 --> 00:16:13,350 What was that? 378 00:16:16,315 --> 00:16:18,431 I can't find a goddamn zip tie anywhere! 379 00:16:18,568 --> 00:16:20,684 All right, fuck it! 380 00:16:25,241 --> 00:16:26,948 Ahh, zip tie. 381 00:16:44,135 --> 00:16:45,671 Why are you making me do this for you again? 382 00:16:45,803 --> 00:16:48,170 Who doesn't wish they could talk to animals, Rick? 383 00:16:48,306 --> 00:16:49,546 Most humans! 384 00:16:49,682 --> 00:16:51,548 There, I'm done. Just stay out of trouble! 385 00:16:53,060 --> 00:16:54,346 Gotta keep moving. Can't stop. 386 00:16:54,478 --> 00:16:56,515 Up, down, down, up, up, up, down, up, stop, down. 387 00:16:56,647 --> 00:16:58,103 The queen needs food. The babies need food. 388 00:16:58,232 --> 00:16:59,768 The queen makes babies. 389 00:17:00,735 --> 00:17:02,271 The situation in Argentina 390 00:17:02,403 --> 00:17:03,689 has proven less convenient than predicted. 391 00:17:03,821 --> 00:17:06,062 We'll have to re-destabilize their economy, 392 00:17:06,198 --> 00:17:08,485 refocus labor class outrage from upper to middle, 393 00:17:08,618 --> 00:17:10,575 foster a coup, and install a compliant regime. 394 00:17:10,703 --> 00:17:11,568 Same as Guatemala? 395 00:17:11,704 --> 00:17:12,910 Yes, but you can double-time it. 396 00:17:13,039 --> 00:17:14,245 We need a quorum to pick a new pope 397 00:17:14,373 --> 00:17:16,910 in case the Exxon/Monsanto thing falls through in Africa. 398 00:17:17,043 --> 00:17:19,501 Why not use chemtrails? Put a canopy on Uganda. 399 00:17:19,629 --> 00:17:21,415 They're set to agitate any mo— What? 400 00:17:21,547 --> 00:17:23,254 That kid is watching us. 401 00:17:23,382 --> 00:17:24,964 So, we're squirrels. He's a kid. 402 00:17:25,092 --> 00:17:28,130 He's watching us like he hears what we're saying. 403 00:17:28,262 --> 00:17:30,754 Hey, kid. Young man? Come here, little boy. 404 00:17:30,890 --> 00:17:33,473 Tell Daphne to run a 199 on a possible Dolittle. 405 00:17:33,601 --> 00:17:36,434 Little boy! We'll give you wishes if you can hear us! 406 00:17:36,562 --> 00:17:38,473 We can make you fly and get candy. 407 00:17:46,822 --> 00:17:49,063 Oh, fuck! Oh, fuck! Fuck me! Fuck me! 408 00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:51,532 Rick! 409 00:17:51,661 --> 00:17:53,823 Ah, shit, Morty, what did you do? 410 00:17:58,709 --> 00:18:00,666 All right, Morty, pack your shit! 411 00:18:00,795 --> 00:18:02,786 That's only gonna keep 'em down for a little bit, Morty! 412 00:18:02,922 --> 00:18:04,253 You fucked with squirrels, Morty! 413 00:18:04,382 --> 00:18:05,588 We got a good five minutes 414 00:18:05,716 --> 00:18:07,502 before they're backing up on our ass, Morty! 415 00:18:07,635 --> 00:18:09,751 We have to pack up and move to a new reality, Morty! 416 00:18:09,887 --> 00:18:12,345 You know I said we could only do that a couple of times! 417 00:18:12,473 --> 00:18:15,431 We're fucked over here because of these damn squirrels, Morty! 418 00:18:15,559 --> 00:18:17,391 I don't know what my reaction is, 419 00:18:17,520 --> 00:18:20,103 but I think I'm mounting in suspicion of you. 420 00:18:20,231 --> 00:18:22,518 - Well, what are you gonna do? - I'm gonna remember everything! 421 00:18:22,650 --> 00:18:23,481 Everything! 422 00:18:32,535 --> 00:18:33,570 Yeah! 423 00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:41,825 Ah! 424 00:18:54,014 --> 00:18:55,550 Well, what'd you find out? 425 00:18:55,683 --> 00:18:57,845 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you gonna do, kill me? 426 00:18:57,977 --> 00:19:00,810 No, I'm not gonna kill you. I'm gonna kill myself! 427 00:19:00,938 --> 00:19:02,599 All those memories just erased! 428 00:19:02,732 --> 00:19:04,314 Sitting in this room collecting dust! 429 00:19:04,442 --> 00:19:07,230 W-What's the point of going on if most of everything 430 00:19:07,361 --> 00:19:10,023 that happens just ends up sitting in here? 431 00:19:11,282 --> 00:19:12,397 All right, kid. 432 00:19:12,533 --> 00:19:14,399 I don't know much aside from the fact that "Men in Black 2" 433 00:19:14,535 --> 00:19:17,653 was a joyless cash grab, but I do know that whatever you have 434 00:19:17,788 --> 00:19:20,029 brewing around in your noggin really connected with you. 435 00:19:20,166 --> 00:19:21,156 I can't deny that, 436 00:19:21,292 --> 00:19:23,704 and I can't deny that I'm inspired by your passion. 437 00:19:23,836 --> 00:19:25,702 I want in. Suicide pact! 438 00:19:25,838 --> 00:19:27,749 - Yes, yeah, let's do it! 439 00:19:27,882 --> 00:19:30,419 Together, you old son of a bitch! On three! 440 00:19:31,802 --> 00:19:32,917 Two... 441 00:19:33,053 --> 00:19:36,091 You guys doing Morty's Mind Blowers? 442 00:19:36,223 --> 00:19:37,930 Morty's Mind Blowers? 443 00:19:38,058 --> 00:19:40,345 Grandpa, is this a scenario three? 444 00:19:40,478 --> 00:19:42,810 Uh, w-what's that, and w-who are you? 445 00:19:42,938 --> 00:19:45,771 Oh, man, it's a scenario four. 446 00:20:02,875 --> 00:20:04,741 Ugh, fucking God damn it! 447 00:20:04,877 --> 00:20:06,663 I don't get paid enough for this shit! 448 00:20:07,546 --> 00:20:10,755 There's a Craftsman nearby. I can smell it. 449 00:20:10,883 --> 00:20:13,124 Whoa, what — what — 450 00:20:13,260 --> 00:20:14,170 Can I help you? 451 00:20:14,303 --> 00:20:17,011 H-How did we fall asleep during interdimensional cable? 452 00:20:17,139 --> 00:20:18,755 - Yeah, what the hell, Summer? - Summer, you dumb bitch! 453 00:20:18,891 --> 00:20:20,006 How long were we out, you dumb bitch! 454 00:20:20,142 --> 00:20:21,052 How much interdimensional cable did we miss, you stupid bitch! 455 00:20:21,185 --> 00:20:22,971 How many improv TV shows with commercials did we miss, Summer? 456 00:20:23,103 --> 00:20:24,093 Why did you let us fall asleep? 457 00:20:24,230 --> 00:20:25,470 - You dumb bitch! - You stupid bitch! 458 00:20:25,606 --> 00:20:26,812 All right, Morty, fuck this noise. 459 00:20:26,941 --> 00:20:28,397 Let's get out of here and go on a classic 460 00:20:28,526 --> 00:20:31,143 - Rick and Morty adventure. - Yeah, right, Rick, I'm all-in. 461 00:20:31,278 --> 00:20:33,235 No wonder you're constantly fighting 462 00:20:33,364 --> 00:20:34,946 with each other and behind schedule. 463 00:20:35,074 --> 00:20:36,564 - What? - Nothing. 464 00:21:03,978 --> 00:21:05,343 Rick? Hello? 465 00:21:05,479 --> 00:21:06,935 Just here for my putter. 466 00:21:07,064 --> 00:21:09,522 Jerry's Mind Blowers? 467 00:21:13,737 --> 00:21:14,818 Follow the boys! 468 00:21:19,910 --> 00:21:21,617 We're charged and aimed at Alpha Centauri, 469 00:21:21,745 --> 00:21:23,611 ready for transport. 470 00:21:23,747 --> 00:21:26,034 They fell for it! Let's send Gobo home! 471 00:21:26,166 --> 00:21:27,531 - All right! 472 00:21:27,668 --> 00:21:29,625 - Where's Dad? - He should be here any second. 473 00:21:29,753 --> 00:21:31,494 It's funny, Jerry spent his life seeking attention, 474 00:21:31,630 --> 00:21:33,792 but in the end, humanity's instinctive dismissal of him 475 00:21:33,924 --> 00:21:35,210 saved an alien's life. 476 00:21:35,342 --> 00:21:37,049 He knows where to go, right? 477 00:21:37,177 --> 00:21:38,963 Yep, any minute now. 478 00:21:43,267 --> 00:21:45,133 Did it work? Did you guys get Gobo home? 479 00:21:45,269 --> 00:21:47,510 You have Gobo! You were supposed to bring him to the hill! 480 00:21:47,646 --> 00:21:49,228 As if. He was in your basket 481 00:21:49,356 --> 00:21:50,938 He was in your car! 482 00:21:55,738 --> 00:21:56,648 Oh! 483 00:21:56,780 --> 00:21:58,691 Oof! Dibs on his stuff.