1 00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:08,860 In this land of ours, there are many great pits, 2 00:00:08,950 --> 00:00:11,270 but none more bottomless than the bottomless pit, 3 00:00:11,370 --> 00:00:13,330 Which as you can see here, is bottomless. 4 00:00:15,830 --> 00:00:17,520 Question. Is it bottomless? 5 00:00:18,340 --> 00:00:20,760 Kids, could one of you try explaining this to Soos? 6 00:00:20,850 --> 00:00:22,640 Grunkle Stan, why are we here again? 7 00:00:22,710 --> 00:00:24,590 To dispose of things that we don't want. 8 00:00:24,680 --> 00:00:27,050 So long, mystery shack suggestion cards. 9 00:00:27,590 --> 00:00:29,920 Goodbye, creepy love letters from Lil' Gideon. 10 00:00:30,710 --> 00:00:31,920 Die! Die! 11 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:34,890 What are you doing? 12 00:00:34,970 --> 00:00:36,950 Throwing stuff, dude. Everyone's doing it! 13 00:00:40,500 --> 00:00:41,570 What you got there, Mabel? 14 00:00:42,140 --> 00:00:45,370 It's just my personal box of mysterious secrets. 15 00:00:45,430 --> 00:00:47,680 Nothing worth wondering about! 16 00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:51,820 Goodbye forever! 17 00:00:53,210 --> 00:00:55,210 Grunkle Stan, do I really have to be the one to point out 18 00:00:55,310 --> 00:00:58,200 that a bottomless pit is, by definition, impossible? 19 00:00:58,650 --> 00:00:59,390 Says you! 20 00:00:59,890 --> 00:01:01,100 Well, I guess we'll never know. 21 00:01:04,850 --> 00:01:07,890 Aah! It's some sort of invisible pushing force! 22 00:01:08,140 --> 00:01:09,940 Quick! Everyone back to the shack! 23 00:01:11,470 --> 00:01:13,060 I'm not done getting rid of these yet! 24 00:01:15,020 --> 00:01:16,070 Grunkle Stan! No! 25 00:01:16,580 --> 00:01:19,850 Almost... almost... almost... 26 00:02:02,950 --> 00:02:05,030 Gravity Falls S01E14 Bottomless Pit 27 00:02:17,430 --> 00:02:18,890 So, anyone wanna scream some more? 28 00:02:18,990 --> 00:02:20,030 Where are we? 29 00:02:22,110 --> 00:02:25,320 We're somewhere where it looks like we're nowhere. 30 00:02:26,910 --> 00:02:28,460 We're gonna land on something eventually. 31 00:02:28,570 --> 00:02:29,850 Could be any second now! 32 00:02:35,360 --> 00:02:37,510 Well, it looks like we're down here for the long haul. 33 00:02:37,610 --> 00:02:39,020 Who wants to see some card tricks? 34 00:02:43,140 --> 00:02:43,930 Ta-da! 35 00:02:45,110 --> 00:02:47,400 Hey! Maybe we should pass the time by tellin' stories. 36 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:49,920 I've got a story! It's called: "The time Grunkle Stan 37 00:02:50,030 --> 00:02:51,930 got us all thrown into a bottomless pit. 38 00:02:52,030 --> 00:02:54,440 Where we spent the rest of our natural lives!" 39 00:02:55,560 --> 00:02:56,790 Go on. 40 00:02:56,890 --> 00:02:59,310 Come on, Dipper, you can do better than that. 41 00:02:59,450 --> 00:03:01,610 Fine. I'll tell you a story, 42 00:03:01,740 --> 00:03:03,520 A story I'd like to call: 43 00:03:03,760 --> 00:03:04,710 Voice over. 44 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:07,480 Ready? 45 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:10,490 Spin the pig! Whoo! 46 00:03:13,540 --> 00:03:16,180 Hey, Grunkle Stan, ever kissed a pig before? 47 00:03:16,300 --> 00:03:17,810 I'm not gonna answer that question. 48 00:03:18,290 --> 00:03:20,960 Guys! Guys! I think I just got bit by a snake! 49 00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:23,200 I need you to get me to a hospital quick! 50 00:03:25,550 --> 00:03:26,660 What? What's so funny? 51 00:03:26,780 --> 00:03:29,200 Uh, sorry, it's just hard to focus on what you're saying 52 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:31,480 with that squeaky puberty voice you got there. 53 00:03:31,610 --> 00:03:32,300 My what? 54 00:03:32,410 --> 00:03:34,420 It's nothing to be ashamed of, Dipper. 55 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:37,190 Your voice is hilarious. 56 00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:38,510 Are you saying my voice cracks? 57 00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:39,680 My voice doesn't crack. 58 00:03:39,790 --> 00:03:41,430 Dude, no offense, but it cracks so much 59 00:03:41,530 --> 00:03:43,090 we've already made a techno remix out of it. 60 00:03:43,620 --> 00:03:44,210 Nice to meet you. 61 00:03:44,320 --> 00:03:45,740 My name's Dipper Pines. 62 00:03:45,850 --> 00:03:47,090 P-p-pines, Pines, Pines. 63 00:03:47,190 --> 00:03:47,810 Nice to meet you. 64 00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:48,550 P-p-pines, Pines, Pines. 65 00:03:48,650 --> 00:03:50,350 Do I really sound like that? 66 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:52,340 Oh! Here comes my favorite part! 67 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:54,250 Stop it, guys! 68 00:03:56,040 --> 00:03:56,750 Gimme that! 69 00:03:59,540 --> 00:04:01,020 Spin the pig! 70 00:04:04,230 --> 00:04:06,610 Ugh! Even my sighs sound weird. 71 00:04:06,750 --> 00:04:07,860 - Hello there! - Aah! 72 00:04:08,210 --> 00:04:10,490 I couldn't help but overhear yer sitchy-ation! 73 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:11,550 Old man McGucket! 74 00:04:12,740 --> 00:04:13,640 Part-time inventor! 75 00:04:13,770 --> 00:04:15,220 Why did you spit on your hand? 76 00:04:15,340 --> 00:04:16,370 I don't rightly know! 77 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:18,120 Hey, I remember you! 78 00:04:18,270 --> 00:04:19,780 Your robot almost killed me! 79 00:04:19,900 --> 00:04:22,810 Come here! Follow me into this dark, dangerous alley! 80 00:04:24,250 --> 00:04:27,200 Lately I been a-tinkerizin' with a voice altering tonic, 81 00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:30,690 on account of my horrifyin' voice! 82 00:04:33,530 --> 00:04:37,430 You can run, but I'll still be in yer nightmares! 83 00:04:37,610 --> 00:04:39,540 This will really fix my voice? 84 00:04:39,700 --> 00:04:41,250 Thanks! Ah! 85 00:04:43,660 --> 00:04:45,960 Come mornin', you'll sound like a new man! 86 00:04:46,330 --> 00:04:48,690 If you survive. 87 00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:57,890 Good morning, Dipper. 88 00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:02,210 I did it! I did it! 89 00:05:02,380 --> 00:05:04,960 Now I have a new voice! 90 00:05:07,560 --> 00:05:11,100 'morning, Mabel. Who's my favorite Mabel? 91 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,120 Who are you? 92 00:05:13,210 --> 00:05:14,660 What have you done with my brother? 93 00:05:14,790 --> 00:05:15,270 Dipper! 94 00:05:15,380 --> 00:05:17,820 I'll save you from this body-switching warlock! 95 00:05:17,920 --> 00:05:18,790 Mabel, it's me! 96 00:05:19,010 --> 00:05:20,670 This is my voice now. 97 00:05:20,860 --> 00:05:22,200 I sound awesome. 98 00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:24,270 Sound awesome. 99 00:05:24,610 --> 00:05:27,840 I knew boys' voices changed, but this is weird. 100 00:05:28,030 --> 00:05:29,270 Weird and bad. 101 00:05:29,420 --> 00:05:32,620 Mabel, this is the best thing that ever happened to me. 102 00:05:32,770 --> 00:05:35,100 And just think of the prank calls. 103 00:05:37,270 --> 00:05:37,780 Hello? 104 00:05:37,930 --> 00:05:41,940 Hello. This is the president of the United States of America. 105 00:05:42,090 --> 00:05:43,430 I'm calling to tell you... 106 00:05:45,840 --> 00:05:47,240 What? Who is this? 107 00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:50,280 Ho-ho-ho! Magnificent! 108 00:05:50,410 --> 00:05:52,010 Mabel no like. 109 00:05:54,430 --> 00:05:56,750 How you diddly doing, Soos? 110 00:05:56,860 --> 00:05:57,620 - Kill it! - Oh! 111 00:05:57,760 --> 00:05:59,400 Kill it with fire! Everyone flee! 112 00:06:01,950 --> 00:06:03,230 What gives, man? 113 00:06:03,340 --> 00:06:05,900 You guys all made fun of my old voice. 114 00:06:06,010 --> 00:06:07,920 I thought you'd like the new one. 115 00:06:08,050 --> 00:06:09,990 Dude, at least before you sounded like a real person. 116 00:06:10,220 --> 00:06:12,450 Now you sound like some kind of weird commercial dude. 117 00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:13,750 I'll find Stan. 118 00:06:13,890 --> 00:06:16,220 He'll like my new voice. You'll see! 119 00:06:16,360 --> 00:06:18,790 I'll be right back after these messages. 120 00:06:18,930 --> 00:06:20,790 I, uh, I mean, goodbye. 121 00:06:22,050 --> 00:06:26,040 Grunkle Stan. Grunkle Stan! Where are you, Grunkle Stan? 122 00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:28,310 Huh? I'd know that voice anywhere! 123 00:06:28,610 --> 00:06:30,970 You're the guy who prank called me earlier! 124 00:06:32,670 --> 00:06:33,640 No. No, I'm not. 125 00:06:33,740 --> 00:06:35,400 I'm just a 12-year-old boy! 126 00:06:35,530 --> 00:06:38,650 You expect me to believe that, you crazy-voiced punk? 127 00:06:38,750 --> 00:06:41,110 W-wait! No! Aiyee! 128 00:06:42,230 --> 00:06:44,670 There's a prank caller on the loose! Let's get him! 129 00:06:44,980 --> 00:06:47,290 Yeah! Come on! Come on, let's get him! 130 00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:55,500 Escape! 131 00:06:58,220 --> 00:07:00,820 McGucket! Your invention was a catastrophe! 132 00:07:00,940 --> 00:07:02,880 That's probably why I live in the dump! 133 00:07:04,750 --> 00:07:06,900 My own sister didn't recognize me. 134 00:07:07,010 --> 00:07:08,740 I scared away crowds! 135 00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:12,880 I even sound ridiculous when I cry. 136 00:07:13,010 --> 00:07:14,500 Well, now, here's yer problem! 137 00:07:14,620 --> 00:07:16,260 I gave you the wrong drinky-majig! 138 00:07:16,380 --> 00:07:18,140 This one's for voiceover professional. 139 00:07:19,220 --> 00:07:22,090 Ah! I'm sure I've got a better voice in here somewhere. 140 00:07:22,280 --> 00:07:23,780 Good! Hurry up. 141 00:07:24,810 --> 00:07:26,130 You got here just in time. 142 00:07:26,230 --> 00:07:27,650 Come sundown, you'd have 143 00:07:27,770 --> 00:07:29,870 reverted back to your ridiculous old voice. 144 00:07:29,990 --> 00:07:32,520 It was ridiculous, wasn't it? 145 00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:34,490 D-d-d-d-dipper Pines, 146 00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:35,290 That's me! 147 00:07:35,410 --> 00:07:37,620 This remix is dedicated to my brother. 148 00:07:37,760 --> 00:07:40,040 Dipper, your voice is one of a kind. 149 00:07:40,180 --> 00:07:41,710 Dude, I never heard anything like it. 150 00:07:41,820 --> 00:07:43,080 R-r-remix over! 151 00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:46,930 You ready for yer new voice? 152 00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:49,020 This one should be permanent! 153 00:07:58,410 --> 00:07:59,390 Hey, guys. 154 00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:01,080 - Dipper! - Oh, dude, you're back! 155 00:08:02,310 --> 00:08:04,050 Yeah. I guess I realized 156 00:08:04,160 --> 00:08:06,150 that even though my voice might not be perfect, 157 00:08:06,250 --> 00:08:08,670 It's still mine, and I wouldn't change it for anything, 158 00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:10,660 Not even for whatever was in this new vial. 159 00:08:10,750 --> 00:08:13,010 So what did you do with the rest of that potion? 160 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:14,460 I dumped it in Stan's coffee. 161 00:08:14,810 --> 00:08:16,700 Any of you kids seen my girdle? 162 00:08:16,810 --> 00:08:17,760 Where my girdle at? 163 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:22,460 What? What's so funny? I'm Grunkle Stan! 164 00:08:22,980 --> 00:08:25,450 Kids laughin'. Laughin' at their grunkle. 165 00:08:26,060 --> 00:08:30,530 I spy, with my little eye, something that is Black! 166 00:08:30,650 --> 00:08:32,240 Ooh! Ooh! Everything. 167 00:08:32,350 --> 00:08:33,780 Yay for Soos! 168 00:08:33,890 --> 00:08:35,130 Yay for Soos! 169 00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:37,860 Hey, guys, who wants to pass the time by spinning? 170 00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,290 Everyone spin! 171 00:08:39,400 --> 00:08:39,890 No. 172 00:08:46,140 --> 00:08:48,530 Dipper's pain is funny, but I'm starting to get bored. 173 00:08:48,630 --> 00:08:50,310 Soos, tell a story. 174 00:08:50,420 --> 00:08:51,580 Really? Okay. 175 00:08:51,690 --> 00:08:55,100 This story is called "Soos's really great pinball story." 176 00:08:55,560 --> 00:08:59,000 Is that a good title? Do they have to be, like, puns or whatever? 177 00:09:03,380 --> 00:09:05,520 Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! 178 00:09:05,700 --> 00:09:08,060 This is it, dudes. After four long years of trying, 179 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:09,670 I might finally get the high score 180 00:09:09,770 --> 00:09:11,580 on Stan's creepy old pinball machine. 181 00:09:11,680 --> 00:09:13,200 If I do this, I'll go down 182 00:09:13,330 --> 00:09:14,910 in pinball history with the likes of Sal, Gaff, 183 00:09:15,020 --> 00:09:17,580 and of course Poo. 184 00:09:17,690 --> 00:09:20,200 Have you ever tried maybe just tilting the machine? 185 00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:21,210 I don't know, dudes. 186 00:09:21,330 --> 00:09:23,680 Isn't breaking the rules, like, against the rules? 187 00:09:23,780 --> 00:09:25,940 Nuts to the rules! Tilt! Tilt! Tilt! 188 00:09:27,670 --> 00:09:29,870 Failure. You stink! 189 00:09:29,980 --> 00:09:32,040 All right, that's it. Ready, kids? 190 00:09:34,090 --> 00:09:35,220 Tilt! Tilt! Tilt! Tilt! 191 00:09:35,390 --> 00:09:37,360 Quit tiltin', pardner. Quit tiltin', pardner. 192 00:09:37,470 --> 00:09:38,020 Tilt! 193 00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:40,550 Bull's eye! 194 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:44,430 New high score! 195 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,040 - Oh, yes! - All right! 196 00:09:46,150 --> 00:09:47,960 This is the best moment of my life. 197 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:50,050 This totally beats my old best moment. 198 00:09:56,030 --> 00:09:59,760 That ain't right. You cheated. 199 00:09:59,880 --> 00:10:01,690 Oh, yeah? What are you gonna do about it? 200 00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:04,140 You're just a pinball game, pinball game. 201 00:10:04,260 --> 00:10:05,340 Taunt, taunt. 202 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:06,810 Uh, guys? There's an awful 203 00:10:06,920 --> 00:10:08,850 lot of green lightning coming out of that game. 204 00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:10,710 No, that's the normal amount of green lightning. 205 00:10:18,770 --> 00:10:20,210 Ugh. Five more minutes. 206 00:10:22,630 --> 00:10:24,800 Aah! That's not a normal alarm clock. 207 00:10:24,900 --> 00:10:26,950 Soos! We're inside the game! 208 00:10:27,870 --> 00:10:29,670 - Crazy. - Sweet moses! 209 00:10:29,770 --> 00:10:31,400 Hushed exclamation of wonder. 210 00:10:35,650 --> 00:10:36,310 Awesome! 211 00:10:37,610 --> 00:10:38,900 Boing! Boing! Boing! 212 00:10:40,530 --> 00:10:43,540 Dude, if this is a dream, I never wanna wake up! 213 00:10:44,540 --> 00:10:46,230 That can be arranged. 214 00:10:47,840 --> 00:10:50,880 Welcome to tumbleweed terror, pardners! 215 00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:54,800 Hey, it's the skeleton cowboy guy. 216 00:10:54,890 --> 00:10:56,950 Did you zap me into your game to congratulate me 217 00:10:57,030 --> 00:10:59,100 On getting the high score? I beat poo, dude. 218 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:02,480 Hardly. If'n I do recall, I warned y'all not to cheat. 219 00:11:02,580 --> 00:11:04,200 I tried to be gentleman-like, 220 00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:05,930 but I'm plum sick of being tilted. 221 00:11:07,170 --> 00:11:09,810 So now I reckon. I'm gonna tilt you. 222 00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:12,370 Oh, yeah? Well— well, take this! 223 00:11:12,810 --> 00:11:15,440 Ow! And this! Ow! It hurts! 224 00:11:15,540 --> 00:11:17,640 I wish this was working better! Oh, dude! 225 00:11:18,130 --> 00:11:18,790 Soos! 226 00:11:20,460 --> 00:11:22,350 Get yourselves ready for the... 227 00:11:23,650 --> 00:11:25,230 Multi-ball! 228 00:11:30,300 --> 00:11:30,810 Over there! 229 00:11:32,590 --> 00:11:33,470 Where are you? 230 00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:36,550 I'm not done teachin' you a lesson about cheating yet! 231 00:11:36,650 --> 00:11:38,870 How are we ever gonna get out of here? Think, guys! 232 00:11:38,980 --> 00:11:40,200 I'm trying, but it's hard 233 00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:42,550 with that gorgeous pinball wench distracting me. 234 00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:47,610 Okay, don't worry, guys. 235 00:11:47,710 --> 00:11:49,130 I know every inch of this machine. 236 00:11:49,580 --> 00:11:51,230 There's a manual power switch inside. 237 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:53,060 I can sneak in there and turn off the game, 238 00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:55,840 but we'll have to distract the cowboy guy. 239 00:11:56,070 --> 00:11:57,830 Are either of you good at jumping up and down 240 00:11:57,920 --> 00:11:59,150 and making annoying noises? 241 00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:02,770 My time has come. 242 00:12:03,850 --> 00:12:06,590 All right, let's go, Soos. Soos? 243 00:12:06,700 --> 00:12:08,470 So are you, like, doing anything later or— 244 00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:20,200 Right. 245 00:12:10,930 --> 00:12:13,040 Come on out and show yourselves, varmints! 246 00:12:14,910 --> 00:12:17,260 Listen to me and look at what I'm doing! 247 00:12:21,860 --> 00:12:23,220 Somethin' ain't right here. 248 00:12:23,330 --> 00:12:25,340 Distraction! Distraction! 249 00:12:25,460 --> 00:12:26,920 Let me see where this is goin'. 250 00:12:42,750 --> 00:12:45,970 Yippe-ti-yi— what? Where are ya? 251 00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:49,370 Durn it, I wish I had a neck! 252 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,700 Soos! Psst! What's going on? 253 00:12:56,820 --> 00:12:57,950 Just press the switch already! 254 00:12:58,090 --> 00:13:01,120 Okay, so I was gonna do that, but I've been thinking. 255 00:13:01,230 --> 00:13:11,230 According to this, 256 00:13:01,820 --> 00:13:03,990 turning off the power erases the high score permanently. 257 00:13:04,270 --> 00:13:06,730 That score is, like, my one big life accomplishment. 258 00:13:06,830 --> 00:13:09,370 What? If you don't hurry up we could die in here! 259 00:13:09,650 --> 00:13:12,020 Fair point. But, what is life anyway, 260 00:13:12,140 --> 00:13:14,480 When compared to the immortality of a high score? 261 00:13:14,580 --> 00:13:16,320 Soos! Are you out of your— 262 00:13:16,420 --> 00:13:17,540 There y'all are. 263 00:13:18,790 --> 00:13:21,130 Get ready to meet yer maker, kids! 264 00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:24,340 My maker is ballway games in Redmond, Washington. 265 00:13:30,660 --> 00:13:31,060 Mabel! 266 00:13:35,290 --> 00:13:37,650 - SOOS! - SOOS: PLEASE! 267 00:13:37,750 --> 00:13:39,480 Turn it off! 268 00:13:42,170 --> 00:13:43,460 Goodbye, high score! 269 00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:00,550 Oh, you dudes okay? 270 00:14:00,660 --> 00:14:03,100 Yeah, Soos. You did it! You freed us! 271 00:14:03,550 --> 00:14:05,810 Hey, man, I'm sorry you had to lose your high score. 272 00:14:05,900 --> 00:14:08,440 That's okay. I got a new life accomplishment now: 273 00:14:08,770 --> 00:14:09,680 saving you dudes. 274 00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:13,460 You think that pinball wench will call me? 275 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,030 I can't believe this nonsense! 276 00:14:18,130 --> 00:14:20,510 Magic tonics? Soos winning at something? 277 00:14:20,610 --> 00:14:22,120 what do you come up these stuff? 278 00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:24,060 I'll tell you a good story. 279 00:14:24,180 --> 00:14:27,720 It's called "Grunkle Stan wins the football bowl." 280 00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:34,620 Mr. Pines. 281 00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:37,040 I thought old folks were useless, 282 00:14:37,140 --> 00:14:39,890 But you taught me and my gloating friends a lesson. 283 00:14:41,140 --> 00:14:44,070 Here's your football winning trophy, Mr. Pines! 284 00:14:44,150 --> 00:14:46,380 Thanks, beautiful woman, but I couldn't have done it 285 00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:49,110 without my sidekick, foot-bot. 286 00:14:49,210 --> 00:14:51,940 Thank you for building me, daddy. 287 00:14:55,120 --> 00:14:56,200 I love you, Stan. 288 00:14:56,550 --> 00:14:57,700 Come on. 289 00:14:59,300 --> 00:15:01,180 What? That story was great. 290 00:15:01,280 --> 00:15:03,360 I even threw in a talking robot for the kids. 291 00:15:03,470 --> 00:15:06,510 Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna tell a non-terrible story, 292 00:15:06,610 --> 00:15:08,170 A story called... 293 00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:09,290 Thoothache. 294 00:15:12,980 --> 00:15:15,050 This attraction is gonna make me a fortune! 295 00:15:15,150 --> 00:15:16,750 Easy with that bear, corduroy! 296 00:15:16,850 --> 00:15:18,270 I need him in showroom condition! 297 00:15:20,210 --> 00:15:21,790 No! No! 298 00:15:21,900 --> 00:15:23,170 Aw! They're hugging! 299 00:15:23,530 --> 00:15:24,960 So let me get this straight. 300 00:15:25,050 --> 00:15:27,950 Your plan is to teach this bear to ride a bicycle? 301 00:15:28,040 --> 00:15:30,790 Nah, come on. Everyone's seen a bicycle-riding bear. 302 00:15:31,120 --> 00:15:33,030 No, no. I'm gonna teach this bear... 303 00:15:33,580 --> 00:15:34,710 To drive! 304 00:15:38,010 --> 00:15:40,090 And the yellow light means speed up. 305 00:15:41,870 --> 00:15:42,380 Uh-oh. 306 00:15:44,930 --> 00:15:47,140 What seems to be the problem, officers? 307 00:15:49,060 --> 00:15:52,210 Now there had better be a darn good explanation for this. 308 00:15:52,370 --> 00:15:53,260 Oh, there is. 309 00:15:53,380 --> 00:15:56,990 You see, I'm a very old man, not long for this earth, 310 00:15:57,100 --> 00:15:59,530 and the doctor's assigned me a seeing-eye bear 311 00:15:59,630 --> 00:16:01,670 To drive me to the hospital in case of emergencies. 312 00:16:02,070 --> 00:16:05,060 Is that right? Then where's your doctor's note? 313 00:16:05,630 --> 00:16:08,090 Why, it's right here, inside my jacket! 314 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:09,840 Ah! There you go! 315 00:16:13,410 --> 00:16:15,830 Well, I can't argue with dr. Medicine. 316 00:16:15,930 --> 00:16:17,640 To the hospital, honeypants! 317 00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:26,180 Grunkle Stan, how could you lie to those policemen? 318 00:16:26,290 --> 00:16:28,300 Don't you know lying is always wrong? 319 00:16:28,410 --> 00:16:30,340 Mabel, when you get to be my age, 320 00:16:30,440 --> 00:16:31,190 You'll learn that sometimes 321 00:16:31,290 --> 00:16:33,400 You have to bend the truth for the greater good. 322 00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:35,620 Hey, has anyone seen my plate of spaghetti? 323 00:16:36,810 --> 00:16:37,710 No. 324 00:16:37,850 --> 00:16:41,060 But I bet Soos has. You know how he likes to eat. 325 00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:44,170 This is a dark day. Thanks, Grunkle Stan! 326 00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:46,320 See? Greater good. 327 00:16:50,630 --> 00:16:53,240 Waddles, what am I gonna do about Grunkle Stan? 328 00:16:53,620 --> 00:16:55,130 He needs to stop lying. 329 00:16:55,180 --> 00:16:57,510 I know! But how do we stop him? 330 00:16:57,610 --> 00:16:59,840 Maybe you should check Dipper's journal. 331 00:16:59,950 --> 00:17:00,430 Oink, oink! 332 00:17:00,750 --> 00:17:02,280 Say "Oink" One more time. 333 00:17:02,580 --> 00:17:03,450 Oink, oink. 334 00:17:03,550 --> 00:17:05,270 Waddles, you genius! 335 00:17:07,770 --> 00:17:11,060 "Buried 'neath a tree stump in the deep forest are truth teeth, 336 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:16,110 which force upon the wearer an inability to lie." Hmm. 337 00:17:34,580 --> 00:17:37,360 Aah! What's going on? What? Mabel? 338 00:17:37,470 --> 00:17:38,480 Quick question. 339 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,580 What happened to Dipper's spaghetti plate? 340 00:17:40,990 --> 00:17:43,000 I ate it, because I have little to no concern 341 00:17:43,100 --> 00:17:45,230 for other people's possessions or emotions. 342 00:17:46,760 --> 00:17:48,810 Huh. That was strangely candid. 343 00:17:48,910 --> 00:17:52,290 Almost as if I'm unable to lie. Well, goodnight! 344 00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:58,640 You what? That seems like a horrible idea! 345 00:17:58,890 --> 00:17:59,930 It's great! 346 00:18:00,030 --> 00:18:01,660 Now he has to tell the truth. 347 00:18:03,220 --> 00:18:04,790 Scrambled meat, here it is. 348 00:18:05,380 --> 00:18:08,250 Stan, what do you do in secret every day during your lunch break? 349 00:18:08,540 --> 00:18:11,600 Usually I spend the hour aggressively scratching myself 350 00:18:11,700 --> 00:18:13,070 in places I shouldn't mention. 351 00:18:13,190 --> 00:18:14,940 Now I'm going to avoid making eye contact 352 00:18:15,050 --> 00:18:16,450 by pretending to read this newspaper, 353 00:18:16,570 --> 00:18:19,090 And go to the bathroom without washing my hands. 354 00:18:20,740 --> 00:18:21,820 Well, that was disturbing. 355 00:18:21,940 --> 00:18:23,150 Don't worry, Dipper. 356 00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:25,210 The truth is always a good thing. 357 00:18:26,530 --> 00:18:27,220 Hey, excuse me. 358 00:18:27,330 --> 00:18:29,110 Do you think this t-shirt is my size? 359 00:18:29,260 --> 00:18:31,630 Never mind the t-shirt! Hey, everybody! 360 00:18:31,740 --> 00:18:34,610 Look at this guy's abnormal and unattractive face! 361 00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:37,160 I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. 362 00:18:38,330 --> 00:18:39,520 Doing my taxes. 363 00:18:41,070 --> 00:18:43,180 Uh, Grunkle Stan, why did you write this? 364 00:18:43,290 --> 00:18:45,990 Because I regularly commit massive tax fraud. 365 00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:49,020 Might wanna tuck that one away there. 366 00:18:51,530 --> 00:18:52,330 Oh, no! 367 00:18:55,210 --> 00:18:57,600 Sometimes I think, is this all there is? 368 00:18:57,940 --> 00:19:00,850 Is life just some kind of horrific joke without a punch line? 369 00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:02,690 That we're all just biding our time 370 00:19:02,790 --> 00:19:04,700 until the sweet, sweet release of death? 371 00:19:13,620 --> 00:19:14,350 Kids! 372 00:19:14,470 --> 00:19:16,810 I think I have a growth forming on my back! 373 00:19:16,920 --> 00:19:18,980 Just wanted to be honest with you guys! 374 00:19:19,090 --> 00:19:20,300 I can't take it anymore, Mabel! 375 00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:22,130 You have to take those teeth out of his mouth. 376 00:19:22,230 --> 00:19:23,900 But then he'd be a liar again! 377 00:19:24,030 --> 00:19:26,450 Could is possibly be any worse than this? 378 00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:29,660 So after further investigation, 379 00:19:29,780 --> 00:19:33,580 Turns out there is no Dr. Medicine in Gravity Falls. 380 00:19:33,730 --> 00:19:36,370 You'd better have a durn good explanation for this. 381 00:19:36,490 --> 00:19:37,340 Oh, and I do! 382 00:19:37,460 --> 00:19:38,780 You see, I lied to you. 383 00:19:38,890 --> 00:19:41,460 In addition, I've been parking in handicapped spaces, 384 00:19:41,580 --> 00:19:42,800 shoplifting fireworks, 385 00:19:42,900 --> 00:19:45,730 And smuggling endangered animals across multiple state lines. 386 00:19:46,180 --> 00:19:47,200 Also, you're fat. 387 00:19:49,270 --> 00:19:50,670 Is all this true? 388 00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:53,540 No, no, it's not true... right, Mabel? 389 00:19:53,660 --> 00:19:55,210 Uh... sirs, 390 00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:58,160 I have to be completely and totally honest with you. 391 00:19:58,280 --> 00:19:59,860 Our great uncle Stan is... 392 00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:01,890 Is... ugh! 393 00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:06,500 Stan is... 394 00:20:07,390 --> 00:20:09,250 secretly a crime fiction writer! 395 00:20:09,810 --> 00:20:10,230 What? 396 00:20:10,940 --> 00:20:12,560 Yeah! He was just telling you 397 00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:15,070 about a character from his upcoming page-turner 398 00:20:15,180 --> 00:20:16,420 crime grandpa. 399 00:20:16,540 --> 00:20:18,650 He's never committed a crime in his life! 400 00:20:18,770 --> 00:20:21,620 Also, have you lost weight? 401 00:20:24,220 --> 00:20:26,250 Finally, someone noticed. 402 00:20:26,350 --> 00:20:27,370 Wow, an author! 403 00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:28,950 Can you teach me how to read? 404 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:30,280 What? Author? 405 00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:32,710 Writer— masters of fiction! 406 00:20:32,850 --> 00:20:34,010 Good night, officers! 407 00:20:35,330 --> 00:20:36,470 Hey, you all right? 408 00:20:36,840 --> 00:20:38,330 I can't believe I lied! 409 00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:40,630 Mabel, it was for the greater good. 410 00:20:40,810 --> 00:20:42,790 Yeah. The greater good. 411 00:20:43,310 --> 00:20:44,520 Hello, police station? 412 00:20:44,630 --> 00:20:47,010 Yeah, I forgot to tell 'em about my tax fraud. 413 00:20:47,560 --> 00:20:49,530 No, tax fraud. 414 00:20:50,460 --> 00:20:51,150 Get 'em out! 415 00:20:51,280 --> 00:20:52,650 What's gotten into you kids? 416 00:20:53,540 --> 00:20:56,020 We have to find a place to get rid of these! 417 00:21:00,230 --> 00:21:03,560 And I never saw that box full of magical teeth again. 418 00:21:04,220 --> 00:21:05,250 Oh, wait, there it is. 419 00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:09,150 Oh, sweet, my shoes. 420 00:21:09,970 --> 00:21:11,370 I liked the part with the bear. 421 00:21:11,490 --> 00:21:13,110 The rest seemed pretty farfetched. 422 00:21:13,220 --> 00:21:14,390 Mabel, we already know that story. 423 00:21:14,500 --> 00:21:15,470 We just lived through it. 424 00:21:15,580 --> 00:21:17,580 So, if we're living through that story right now, 425 00:21:17,750 --> 00:21:18,570 How does it end? 426 00:21:18,680 --> 00:21:20,350 Guys, do you see that? 427 00:21:23,550 --> 00:21:25,090 - Oh, what is that? - Oh, no! 428 00:21:25,190 --> 00:21:26,930 - Where are we going? - Oh, my god! 429 00:21:35,250 --> 00:21:36,770 Where... where are we? 430 00:21:37,410 --> 00:21:39,120 Look! The shack! 431 00:21:39,220 --> 00:21:40,410 Which means... 432 00:21:40,910 --> 00:21:43,450 We came right back out the top 433 00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:46,080 And I don't think any time has passed. 434 00:21:46,320 --> 00:21:48,180 It must be some kind of wormhole 435 00:21:48,270 --> 00:21:50,610 Yeah, dude, that sounds science enough to be true. 436 00:21:50,710 --> 00:21:52,290 But, but that's impossible. 437 00:21:52,410 --> 00:21:53,840 No one will believe us. 438 00:21:53,980 --> 00:21:56,850 Maybe this is one story we should keep to ourselves. 439 00:21:57,120 --> 00:21:58,420 Agree. 440 00:22:02,820 --> 00:22:03,920 He'll be fine. 441 00:22:31,420 --> 00:22:32,720 This is stupid.