1 00:00:01,336 --> 00:00:03,088 It's settled. 2 00:00:03,130 --> 00:00:05,257 The urinals in the women's restroom will be turned into planters. 3 00:00:05,299 --> 00:00:07,342 Onto chores. 4 00:00:07,384 --> 00:00:09,052 We need some able bodies to clear out a space 5 00:00:09,094 --> 00:00:10,554 in the east hall's storage room. 6 00:00:10,596 --> 00:00:12,347 I'll do it. Really? 7 00:00:12,389 --> 00:00:13,557 Yeah, Annie always goes from the easy chores to the hardest. 8 00:00:13,599 --> 00:00:14,809 That's true, isn't it? 9 00:00:14,850 --> 00:00:16,143 I'll do it too. Yeah, me too. 10 00:00:16,184 --> 00:00:17,770 Okay, that concludes this meeting. 11 00:00:17,812 --> 00:00:19,104 Oh! Aw, man! 12 00:00:19,146 --> 00:00:20,648 Nobody picks up on my patterns! 13 00:00:20,689 --> 00:00:21,941 What am I gonna say next? 14 00:00:21,981 --> 00:00:24,151 Graham cracker! You didn't know. 15 00:00:24,192 --> 00:00:26,236 Hey, it's the "Aw couple." 16 00:00:26,278 --> 00:00:27,613 Aw. 17 00:00:27,655 --> 00:00:29,323 Look what Rachel got me. Pile of Bullets. 18 00:00:29,364 --> 00:00:31,366 An interactive old west themed VCR game from the '90s. 19 00:00:31,408 --> 00:00:33,160 I found it at goodwill. 20 00:00:33,201 --> 00:00:35,913 It was between a thighmaster and a Dick Tracy burger king glass. 21 00:00:35,955 --> 00:00:37,790 Happy anniversary. Anniversary? 22 00:00:37,832 --> 00:00:39,708 I guess I should learn your name, young lady. 23 00:00:39,750 --> 00:00:42,461 Oh, Rachel. Rachel. Nice to meet you, Rachel. 24 00:00:42,503 --> 00:00:43,754 You can go. 25 00:00:43,796 --> 00:00:45,506 Okay. 26 00:00:45,547 --> 00:00:47,090 Aw! 27 00:00:47,132 --> 00:00:49,050 Anniversary? Yeah, Rachel and I have been dating 28 00:00:49,092 --> 00:00:50,636 for one of your months, but our relationship 29 00:00:50,678 --> 00:00:52,513 is 12 times more efficient, so it's really been a year. 30 00:00:52,554 --> 00:00:53,764 Our sleep cycles are in synch, 31 00:00:53,806 --> 00:00:55,015 we can communicate with our eyebrows, 32 00:00:55,056 --> 00:00:56,266 and she knows my Netflix password, 33 00:00:56,308 --> 00:00:57,309 Jeff's Netflix password. 34 00:00:57,351 --> 00:00:58,435 Damn it. I'm changing that. 35 00:00:58,477 --> 00:00:59,520 I changed it. To what? 36 00:00:59,561 --> 00:01:01,313 Nice try. 37 00:01:01,355 --> 00:01:02,356 Annie, can Rachel come to our place to play this tonight? 38 00:01:02,397 --> 00:01:03,565 I can't afford to take her anywhere. 39 00:01:03,607 --> 00:01:05,860 Well, my brother's in town for the week, 40 00:01:05,901 --> 00:01:07,068 and I'm broke too, 41 00:01:07,110 --> 00:01:08,236 so I was gonna make him dinner tonight. 42 00:01:08,278 --> 00:01:09,571 Cool. Double date? 43 00:01:09,613 --> 00:01:11,490 Dinner and 1993 interactive VCR game? 44 00:01:11,532 --> 00:01:12,825 What are you making? Salmon. 45 00:01:12,867 --> 00:01:14,910 Buttered noodles. 46 00:01:14,952 --> 00:01:16,203 Buttered noodles are my favorite. 47 00:01:16,244 --> 00:01:17,496 Hmm. Ah! 48 00:01:17,538 --> 00:01:21,667 Quick announcement for two of Greendale's finest. 49 00:01:21,709 --> 00:01:23,418 Payday is postponed until next week. 50 00:01:23,460 --> 00:01:24,628 So this… 51 00:01:25,838 --> 00:01:28,924 Is my freestyle rap apology. 52 00:01:55,951 --> 00:01:57,578 I don't know what that was, I don't. 53 00:01:58,829 --> 00:02:00,915 I don't know what that was. 54 00:02:40,704 --> 00:02:43,415 So nice to have the Edison kids under one roof again. 55 00:02:43,457 --> 00:02:45,542 Remember when we used to cut carrots for mom? 56 00:02:45,584 --> 00:02:46,627 Yes. 57 00:02:46,668 --> 00:02:48,754 I need a soda. Oh, okay. 58 00:02:49,588 --> 00:02:51,130 One, two, three. 59 00:02:53,592 --> 00:02:54,885 Door's busted. 60 00:02:54,927 --> 00:02:56,720 Landlord's in jail and money's tight. 61 00:02:56,762 --> 00:02:58,137 Yeah. 62 00:03:07,064 --> 00:03:08,440 Oh, my God! 63 00:03:08,482 --> 00:03:10,525 Anthony! Thank you! 64 00:03:10,567 --> 00:03:11,819 Yeah. 65 00:03:11,860 --> 00:03:13,946 Hey, Abed, a quick word. Hmm. 66 00:03:16,949 --> 00:03:18,993 What would you think about my brother moving in with us? 67 00:03:19,034 --> 00:03:20,535 Do I just keep cutting carrots? 68 00:03:20,577 --> 00:03:21,996 Yes, Anthony! 69 00:03:22,037 --> 00:03:23,747 He has money. He's handy. 70 00:03:23,789 --> 00:03:25,624 You're putting me on the spot. 71 00:03:25,666 --> 00:03:27,459 I guess my kneejerk concern would be that he's a Viking 72 00:03:27,501 --> 00:03:29,670 and might only use our home as a temporary base before moving inland 73 00:03:29,711 --> 00:03:31,755 where lumber is more plentiful. 74 00:03:31,797 --> 00:03:33,256 He's a good guy. We can't afford to keep splitting the rent two ways. 75 00:03:33,298 --> 00:03:35,216 You have a better idea? How about Rachel? 76 00:03:35,258 --> 00:03:37,218 Is that a joke? Is it cool if I poop? 77 00:03:37,260 --> 00:03:39,847 No, Anthony! Just cut the carrots! 78 00:03:39,888 --> 00:03:41,515 You've been dating Rachel for a month. 79 00:03:41,556 --> 00:03:43,433 I don't think you heard his question. The answer is yes! 80 00:03:45,686 --> 00:03:47,688 Rachel and I have been dating for the equivalent of a year. 81 00:03:47,729 --> 00:03:50,273 Oh, really? 'Cause I feel like I've been hearing about that for two years. 82 00:03:50,315 --> 00:03:52,526 You can't just microwave a relationship like it's a bean burrito. 83 00:03:52,567 --> 00:03:54,028 Annie. I ain't living with your month long girlfriend, brah. 84 00:03:54,069 --> 00:03:55,278 Well, I ain't living with your wack ass, 85 00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:56,222 don't-know-whether- to-keep- cutting-carrots- 86 00:03:56,237 --> 00:03:57,531 or-ask-if-he-can-take- a-poop-brother. 87 00:03:57,572 --> 00:03:58,991 Can we discuss this later? 88 00:03:59,033 --> 00:04:00,200 Rachel's on her way, and I'd like to practice my smile. 89 00:04:02,953 --> 00:04:05,080 I guess it was just air. 90 00:04:11,920 --> 00:04:13,964 Why are we organizing a storage room? 91 00:04:14,006 --> 00:04:15,632 How is this not a janitor's job? 92 00:04:15,674 --> 00:04:17,300 Can I ask you something? 93 00:04:17,342 --> 00:04:19,427 Why the hell do you have all those muscles 94 00:04:19,469 --> 00:04:21,889 if you're gonna bitch about moving boxes? 95 00:04:21,930 --> 00:04:23,598 Is the air working in here? 96 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:25,684 I'm sweating like a catholic on judgment day. 97 00:04:25,726 --> 00:04:27,061 Just a little protestant humor. 98 00:04:27,102 --> 00:04:29,229 I've got more. Oh, can't wait. 99 00:04:31,565 --> 00:04:32,983 Nothin'. 100 00:04:33,025 --> 00:04:36,111 Wait, there's something in there blocking the vent. 101 00:04:36,153 --> 00:04:37,779 You gonna open it? 102 00:04:37,821 --> 00:04:39,990 You do realize nothing good has ever been found in a vent, right? 103 00:04:40,032 --> 00:04:41,241 It's a vent. 104 00:04:42,159 --> 00:04:43,410 Whoa. 105 00:04:45,079 --> 00:04:46,371 Huh. 106 00:04:55,463 --> 00:04:58,258 Intro to Chemistry. Third edition. 107 00:05:01,887 --> 00:05:03,388 Mint. 108 00:05:03,430 --> 00:05:06,558 $200 retail. 160 on the street. 109 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,018 Why are there books in an air duct? 110 00:05:08,060 --> 00:05:10,187 Why is there hot sauce in the bathroom? 111 00:05:10,229 --> 00:05:11,521 It's Greendale. They must be stolen. 112 00:05:11,563 --> 00:05:14,315 We have to tell the dean. Hold on. 113 00:05:14,357 --> 00:05:18,862 Let's just calm down and have a slow, pleasant chat 114 00:05:18,904 --> 00:05:20,030 about possibilities. 115 00:05:20,072 --> 00:05:21,865 What kind? All kinds. 116 00:05:21,907 --> 00:05:23,242 Anything is possible. 117 00:05:23,283 --> 00:05:24,993 We might one day have hover cars. 118 00:05:25,035 --> 00:05:27,495 Kale might be poisonous. 119 00:05:27,537 --> 00:05:29,248 And we might not have to get the dean involved here. 120 00:05:29,289 --> 00:05:31,666 Jeffrey, these are stolen! From who? 121 00:05:31,708 --> 00:05:33,794 By who? How long ago? 122 00:05:33,835 --> 00:05:35,420 It's "from whom," "by whom." 123 00:05:35,462 --> 00:05:37,172 But he nailed the third question. 124 00:05:37,214 --> 00:05:40,050 Look, we are the committee that deals with Greendale's problems. 125 00:05:40,092 --> 00:05:42,469 Now did you see anything on our list 126 00:05:42,510 --> 00:05:45,264 about a pile of missing books that are worth more than the school they're hidden in? 127 00:05:45,304 --> 00:05:46,514 One thing's for sure. 128 00:05:46,556 --> 00:05:48,850 If we hand these over, they'll really go missing. 129 00:05:48,892 --> 00:05:51,394 And you think that money's gonna be used to cut our paychecks 130 00:05:51,436 --> 00:05:54,231 or to make another rapping peanut costume? 131 00:05:54,273 --> 00:05:56,024 I can't believe what I'm hearing. Fine. 132 00:05:56,066 --> 00:05:58,193 You wanna go to heaven? Walk away, more for us. 133 00:05:58,235 --> 00:05:59,861 I'm an accomplice now! 134 00:05:59,903 --> 00:06:01,696 If I walk away, I'll only get into heaven by turning you in. 135 00:06:01,738 --> 00:06:05,700 But what about your restaurant? What about your kids? 136 00:06:05,742 --> 00:06:09,163 Ms. Bennett, when god talks to you, what language does he use? 137 00:06:09,204 --> 00:06:10,914 Because in my experience, 138 00:06:10,956 --> 00:06:12,331 when he thinks you deserve something, 139 00:06:12,373 --> 00:06:14,417 he drops it on you like a ton of bricks. 140 00:06:20,590 --> 00:06:21,758 Okay. 141 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:23,302 All right. 142 00:06:23,342 --> 00:06:24,552 But if we're gonna do this, 143 00:06:24,594 --> 00:06:26,387 we're gonna do this clean and safe. 144 00:06:26,429 --> 00:06:28,473 We're gonna move these to my restaurant in bread carts, 145 00:06:28,515 --> 00:06:30,142 and we're gonna sit on 'em until we know they're cold. 146 00:06:30,184 --> 00:06:31,643 Then we're gonna price them through a third party, 147 00:06:31,685 --> 00:06:33,603 and we're gonna unload them in a single score. 148 00:06:33,645 --> 00:06:35,147 None of that nickel and dime crap. 149 00:06:35,189 --> 00:06:36,857 I don't wanna leave a trail. 150 00:06:36,898 --> 00:06:38,692 Yeah, great. Wonderful. 151 00:06:38,733 --> 00:06:41,069 Okay, let's count these babies up. 152 00:06:41,111 --> 00:06:42,988 Yeah, great. 153 00:06:43,030 --> 00:06:44,572 When we were kids, 154 00:06:44,614 --> 00:06:46,825 Anthony and I would play time machine. 155 00:06:46,867 --> 00:06:48,202 We would go, 156 00:06:48,243 --> 00:06:50,245 "Oh, no! We're in barbarian times!" 157 00:06:50,287 --> 00:06:52,164 Quick! Back to the time machine!" 158 00:06:52,206 --> 00:06:56,084 And then we would run back to the time machine. 159 00:06:58,545 --> 00:06:59,963 It's true. 160 00:07:00,005 --> 00:07:01,965 I bet that's why Abed is like a brother to me. 161 00:07:02,007 --> 00:07:03,424 You guys are so alike. 162 00:07:03,466 --> 00:07:05,135 I can't accept that based on one time machine story. 163 00:07:05,177 --> 00:07:07,221 Rachel, did you tell Annie about your waterpik? 164 00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:11,850 I suppose now is as good a time as any. 165 00:07:11,892 --> 00:07:13,101 I own a waterpik. 166 00:07:13,143 --> 00:07:14,644 Annie has one too. 167 00:07:14,686 --> 00:07:16,146 You guys both care for your teeth the same amount. 168 00:07:16,188 --> 00:07:17,772 If you shared a bathroom, it'd go pretty smoothly. 169 00:07:17,814 --> 00:07:19,524 Anthony said he could fix our cabinets. 170 00:07:19,566 --> 00:07:21,442 Rachel used to mop floors when she worked at Kmart. She mops good. 171 00:07:21,484 --> 00:07:24,154 Is this a real conversation or are we being bugged by the feds? 172 00:07:24,196 --> 00:07:25,739 Abed. 173 00:07:26,614 --> 00:07:28,408 Sidebar. 174 00:07:31,328 --> 00:07:33,330 What do you think happens after you die? 175 00:07:35,332 --> 00:07:37,417 I don't know. You're lucky. 176 00:07:39,544 --> 00:07:40,754 Stop trying to sell me on Rachel. 177 00:07:40,795 --> 00:07:42,089 Stop pitching Anthony so hard. 178 00:07:42,130 --> 00:07:43,924 You're like ice cream cake out there. Overkill. 179 00:07:43,965 --> 00:07:45,217 We need a roommate. We're broke. 180 00:07:45,259 --> 00:07:46,760 I vote for Rachel. I vote for Anthony. 181 00:07:46,801 --> 00:07:48,762 Flip a coin? No. Coins create parallel timelines. 182 00:07:48,803 --> 00:07:49,888 Rock, paper, scissors? 183 00:07:49,930 --> 00:07:51,348 That's a nine sided coin. 184 00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:54,351 What about Pile of Bullets? 185 00:07:54,393 --> 00:07:56,061 You wanna decide on a roommate 186 00:07:56,103 --> 00:08:00,523 with a 1993 old west themed VCR game? 187 00:08:00,565 --> 00:08:02,192 If Rachel or I win, Rachel moves in. 188 00:08:02,234 --> 00:08:03,610 If you or Anthony win, I'll politely surrender 189 00:08:03,651 --> 00:08:05,570 and count down the days until he eats me. 190 00:08:05,612 --> 00:08:07,572 All right, it's settled. 191 00:08:09,324 --> 00:08:11,368 Is this working? It's a handshake in progress. 192 00:08:12,953 --> 00:08:14,288 Who wants to play Pile of Bullets? 193 00:08:14,329 --> 00:08:15,580 Not me. You have to. 194 00:08:15,622 --> 00:08:17,249 Oh, it's okay, we don't have to. 195 00:08:17,291 --> 00:08:18,499 It's not okay. We do have to. We all have to, 196 00:08:18,541 --> 00:08:19,918 and one day we'll tell you why. 197 00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:21,795 But for now, let's simply retire to the TV area. 198 00:08:21,836 --> 00:08:24,339 For the highest stakes 1993 interactive VCR game 199 00:08:24,381 --> 00:08:26,007 of your entire young adult lives. 200 00:08:31,346 --> 00:08:32,931 Okay, let's see what you got. 201 00:08:41,189 --> 00:08:42,357 Yeah. 202 00:08:42,399 --> 00:08:43,442 Okay. 203 00:08:43,483 --> 00:08:45,068 I know somebody that knows people. 204 00:08:45,110 --> 00:08:46,486 I can get you a price per book, 205 00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:48,029 find a buyer, and make a deal. 206 00:08:48,071 --> 00:08:49,614 For half. That's ridiculous. 207 00:08:49,656 --> 00:08:52,284 I'm assuming more than half the risk. 208 00:08:52,326 --> 00:08:53,994 Half is fair. Not really. 209 00:08:54,035 --> 00:08:56,537 Because they're ours, all 100% of them. 210 00:08:56,579 --> 00:08:58,665 Giving you half is not fair, it's silly. 211 00:08:58,706 --> 00:08:59,958 Okay, good luck. 212 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:01,460 You wanna re-blindfold me? 213 00:09:01,501 --> 00:09:03,711 I know we're in E9 in the east wing. 214 00:09:03,753 --> 00:09:05,880 I know that because it smells like weed. 215 00:09:05,922 --> 00:09:08,216 Not my weed. 216 00:09:08,258 --> 00:09:10,885 Look, I'm willing to give her half. 217 00:09:10,927 --> 00:09:12,971 Hear that, Britta? You can have half of Jeff's share. 218 00:09:13,013 --> 00:09:14,555 That's not what I meant. 219 00:09:14,597 --> 00:09:15,849 That's what you're offering by giving her half of the total. 220 00:09:15,890 --> 00:09:17,476 Either she can get half of all of our money 221 00:09:17,517 --> 00:09:18,726 or she can get half of your share. 222 00:09:18,768 --> 00:09:20,561 Either way, you walk away with about 16%. 223 00:09:20,603 --> 00:09:22,063 That's not fair. Damn right. 224 00:09:22,105 --> 00:09:24,691 Here's what is 25% for each of us. 225 00:09:24,732 --> 00:09:26,485 Take it or leave it, Britta. 226 00:09:31,906 --> 00:09:33,533 Hey, guys. 227 00:09:36,828 --> 00:09:38,205 Hey. 228 00:09:38,246 --> 00:09:40,123 Look, if something sketchy is happening, 229 00:09:40,165 --> 00:09:41,791 I don't care. 230 00:09:41,833 --> 00:09:44,127 So I'm just gonna back out of the room now and… 231 00:09:44,169 --> 00:09:45,712 He can't leave. 232 00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:47,964 No! No! 233 00:09:48,006 --> 00:09:50,217 I didn't see anything. I did not see anything! 234 00:09:50,258 --> 00:09:52,260 Britta, find some rope. 235 00:09:52,302 --> 00:09:54,012 I've got rope. 236 00:09:54,054 --> 00:09:56,890 "Each player starts with six bullet tokens, 237 00:09:56,931 --> 00:10:01,102 "ten gold certificates, and a color-coded posse token." 238 00:10:01,144 --> 00:10:02,437 There's two types of tokens? 239 00:10:02,479 --> 00:10:03,938 I'm sure we'll figure it out. 240 00:10:05,315 --> 00:10:06,691 Howdy! 241 00:10:06,733 --> 00:10:08,443 You look like a real group of gunslingers. 242 00:10:08,485 --> 00:10:10,653 Everyone in town's mighty scared, 243 00:10:10,695 --> 00:10:13,240 what with all the gold and the outlaws. 244 00:10:13,281 --> 00:10:15,534 But only one of us can make it out alive. 245 00:10:15,575 --> 00:10:17,035 Are we robbing the town? 246 00:10:17,077 --> 00:10:20,330 By now, you should have your bullets, your gold, 247 00:10:20,372 --> 00:10:22,582 and two wild west tokens each. 248 00:10:22,623 --> 00:10:24,918 Hang onto those tokens no matter what. 249 00:10:24,959 --> 00:10:26,753 There's two kinds of tokens. Two each? 250 00:10:26,794 --> 00:10:29,256 Now when you hear the word "Draw," 251 00:10:29,297 --> 00:10:31,632 or when you see a square with a color or number matching 252 00:10:31,674 --> 00:10:33,634 one of you or your opponent's cards, 253 00:10:33,676 --> 00:10:35,595 the first one of you to say, "Bang," 254 00:10:35,636 --> 00:10:37,638 wins the challenged player's token 255 00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:39,807 and the amount of their bid in gold! 256 00:10:39,849 --> 00:10:41,059 What's going on? Shh! 257 00:10:41,101 --> 00:10:42,102 Ready? Yes? 258 00:10:42,143 --> 00:10:43,603 I'm not. Shh! 259 00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:54,406 Are we supposed to be bidding? Draw! 260 00:10:54,448 --> 00:10:56,157 I bid! Pow! Bang! 261 00:10:56,199 --> 00:10:57,200 Rattler! 262 00:10:57,242 --> 00:10:58,410 Bang! Five! Bang? 263 00:10:58,452 --> 00:10:59,453 Yee-haw! 264 00:10:59,494 --> 00:11:00,870 Bang bang! Five! Bang? 265 00:11:00,912 --> 00:11:02,330 Not bad! 266 00:11:02,372 --> 00:11:05,250 Collect your tokens and let's get on to the next round! 267 00:11:05,292 --> 00:11:06,460 What are you doing? Stop that. 268 00:11:06,501 --> 00:11:07,487 He said, "Collect your tokens." 269 00:11:07,502 --> 00:11:08,628 He can't see you. 270 00:11:08,669 --> 00:11:10,922 Didn't Abed shoot whoever's five? 271 00:11:10,964 --> 00:11:13,425 Draw! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! 272 00:11:13,467 --> 00:11:15,676 Odd numbered players, give up two cards! 273 00:11:15,718 --> 00:11:17,137 Draw! We have numbers? 274 00:11:17,178 --> 00:11:19,139 Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. 275 00:11:19,180 --> 00:11:20,639 Okay, okay, I don't think we're doing this right. 276 00:11:20,681 --> 00:11:22,809 Are we sure this is a game and not some art film? 277 00:11:22,850 --> 00:11:24,811 Now what do we do? We rewind it and start over. 278 00:11:24,852 --> 00:11:27,439 Okay, I'll allow it. No, it's okay. 279 00:11:27,481 --> 00:11:28,773 We gave it our best shot, no? 280 00:11:28,815 --> 00:11:31,734 I'm sorry, Rachel, is this your home? 281 00:11:31,776 --> 00:11:33,236 Oh, God, no, I'm sorry. 282 00:11:33,278 --> 00:11:34,264 Well, this is what we're playing. 283 00:11:34,279 --> 00:11:35,572 But it doesn't make any sense. 284 00:11:35,614 --> 00:11:37,240 Oh! It sounds like Anthony wants to forfeit. 285 00:11:37,282 --> 00:11:39,284 He doesn't. Don't forfeit, Anthony. 286 00:11:39,326 --> 00:11:40,701 Rachel, we can do this. 287 00:11:40,743 --> 00:11:42,661 Just focus, okay? Okay… 288 00:11:43,121 --> 00:11:44,498 Okay. 289 00:11:46,166 --> 00:11:47,834 Howdy! Howdy. 290 00:11:49,210 --> 00:11:50,837 I love textbooks. 291 00:11:50,878 --> 00:11:51,921 That's why I stole these. 292 00:11:51,963 --> 00:11:53,798 All right, knock it off. What? 293 00:11:53,840 --> 00:11:56,426 You gotta make it sound believable 294 00:11:56,468 --> 00:11:58,303 or you're not getting outta here. 295 00:11:58,345 --> 00:12:00,221 I'm trying. Try harder! 296 00:12:00,263 --> 00:12:01,389 Go. 297 00:12:04,184 --> 00:12:06,186 I love textbooks. 298 00:12:06,227 --> 00:12:07,686 That's why I stole them. 299 00:12:07,728 --> 00:12:10,064 Mmm. Look at this one. 300 00:12:12,609 --> 00:12:14,693 Stolen textbooks are the best kind. 301 00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:16,695 I stole all these books and put 'em in this room 302 00:12:16,737 --> 00:12:18,490 so I could come kiss them. 303 00:12:18,532 --> 00:12:20,575 That's all, thank you. 304 00:12:20,617 --> 00:12:23,036 Please, I'm on parole! 305 00:12:23,077 --> 00:12:24,871 Exactly. 306 00:12:24,912 --> 00:12:26,705 So keep your mouth shut or we'll send this file to everybody. 307 00:12:26,747 --> 00:12:28,041 What do you mean "Everybody"? 308 00:12:28,082 --> 00:12:29,876 Everybody! 309 00:12:33,838 --> 00:12:35,798 Look, I can't do this anymore. What? 310 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:38,218 I'm out. It's too far, it's too… 311 00:12:38,635 --> 00:12:40,637 Evil. 312 00:12:40,679 --> 00:12:42,472 Look, you guys can split the money. 313 00:12:42,514 --> 00:12:44,057 I'm just gonna leave quietly. 314 00:12:44,098 --> 00:12:45,684 Goodbye. 315 00:12:51,231 --> 00:12:52,175 What the hell? 316 00:12:52,190 --> 00:12:53,816 Yeah? What the hell? Ow! 317 00:12:53,858 --> 00:12:55,318 I can't let you leave until we're done with this deal. 318 00:12:55,360 --> 00:12:58,029 Shirley, this is not what god wants you to be doing today! 319 00:12:58,071 --> 00:12:59,698 We had our chance to think about that. 320 00:12:59,738 --> 00:13:01,241 He dropped this on us like a ton of bricks. 321 00:13:01,282 --> 00:13:02,325 Right, Hickey? 322 00:13:02,367 --> 00:13:03,910 Oh, yeah, definitely. 323 00:13:03,951 --> 00:13:05,995 Not to say that this isn't getting insane. 324 00:13:07,706 --> 00:13:10,333 Black hat Bill sure ain't the forgivin' type. 325 00:13:10,375 --> 00:13:11,918 You! Green player! Yes, partner? 326 00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,127 You can do better than that, can't you? 327 00:13:13,169 --> 00:13:14,837 Yes, pardner! 328 00:13:14,879 --> 00:13:16,631 Pick another player that you want to draw a cactus card. 329 00:13:16,673 --> 00:13:18,299 I choose Anthony! Anthony, draw a card. 330 00:13:19,718 --> 00:13:20,927 Oh! This is a good one. 331 00:13:20,968 --> 00:13:22,596 Keep this for when you're in a quick draw. 332 00:13:22,637 --> 00:13:23,638 Rachel, your turn! What do I do? 333 00:13:23,680 --> 00:13:25,181 You roll, you roll. Here. 334 00:13:25,223 --> 00:13:26,433 There. My turn. 335 00:13:26,474 --> 00:13:27,766 Stop! Snake bite! Lose a turn. 336 00:13:27,808 --> 00:13:29,394 Anti-venom. I'll take two. 337 00:13:29,436 --> 00:13:30,729 Draw! Bang! 338 00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:31,854 Okay, I bid five bullets. I raise six. 339 00:13:31,896 --> 00:13:33,523 Eleven. Pass. Reverse! 340 00:13:33,565 --> 00:13:34,899 Hold it! Yee-haw! 341 00:13:34,941 --> 00:13:37,193 Did you remember to say "Yee-haw"? 342 00:13:37,235 --> 00:13:39,778 Anyone that didn't loses a turn. 343 00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:41,155 Collect your coins! 344 00:13:41,197 --> 00:13:43,658 Anthony, I'll trade you two snakes for a bullet. 345 00:13:43,700 --> 00:13:45,784 Just say yes! I don't wanna die. 346 00:13:45,826 --> 00:13:47,245 Stop her, Rachel, stop her! Bang? 347 00:13:47,287 --> 00:13:48,705 No! Bid Five! 348 00:13:48,747 --> 00:13:50,873 Tornado! Tornado! 349 00:13:50,915 --> 00:13:52,083 Nine tornado! 350 00:13:52,125 --> 00:13:53,460 Pass! Seven! Reverse! 351 00:13:53,501 --> 00:13:54,711 Two tornado! Pass! 352 00:13:54,753 --> 00:13:55,836 Double! Draw! 353 00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:57,046 Bang! 354 00:13:57,088 --> 00:13:58,715 Oh, come on. 355 00:13:58,757 --> 00:14:00,799 You son of a bitch! Come on. 356 00:14:00,841 --> 00:14:02,636 Come on, come on. 357 00:14:02,677 --> 00:14:03,762 Come on, come on. 358 00:14:03,802 --> 00:14:05,388 Come on! 359 00:14:08,516 --> 00:14:09,976 If one of you rolled your bullet number, 360 00:14:10,017 --> 00:14:11,561 you're the winner! 361 00:14:11,603 --> 00:14:14,481 Fast-forward to the red screen to get your gold. 362 00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:19,235 Well, more food for the buzzards. 363 00:14:19,277 --> 00:14:20,861 Looks like modern times… 364 00:14:22,113 --> 00:14:24,491 Have come after all. 365 00:14:24,532 --> 00:14:25,825 See ya in the city. 366 00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:27,661 I wanna go home. Me too. 367 00:14:27,702 --> 00:14:29,496 No, we have to play again. 368 00:14:29,537 --> 00:14:31,831 Abed, I think you're having one of your special times, okay? 369 00:14:31,872 --> 00:14:32,999 So I'm gonna give you some space. 370 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,334 I don't want space. I want you to move in here. 371 00:14:34,375 --> 00:14:35,543 What? But that's not resolved! 372 00:14:35,585 --> 00:14:37,086 Anthony might move in, so… What? 373 00:14:37,128 --> 00:14:38,546 We want one of you to live with us. 374 00:14:38,588 --> 00:14:41,299 Yeah, we're settling it with a game of Pile of Bullets. 375 00:14:41,341 --> 00:14:45,303 That is not an explanation that should make anybody want to live here. 376 00:14:47,764 --> 00:14:50,475 Abed, I don't like this side of you, 377 00:14:50,517 --> 00:14:53,478 and I do not like that side of VCR technology. 378 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:55,647 I am glad that it's a dead medium. 379 00:14:55,689 --> 00:14:57,732 That was very uncomfortable. 380 00:15:03,154 --> 00:15:05,239 I don't really know how girlfriends work, 381 00:15:05,281 --> 00:15:07,158 but I don't think you have one anymore. 382 00:15:15,667 --> 00:15:17,627 Okay, cool. See you there. 383 00:15:17,669 --> 00:15:18,919 I'm meeting my guy in an hour. 384 00:15:18,961 --> 00:15:20,463 He wants to see a sample, set a price, 385 00:15:20,505 --> 00:15:21,756 and then we'll do the exchange. 386 00:15:21,798 --> 00:15:23,383 Oh, brother. 387 00:15:23,424 --> 00:15:25,051 So Britta doesn't know how much she's getting from this guy 388 00:15:25,092 --> 00:15:26,678 that none of us will ever see again. 389 00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:28,596 But she knows one thing for sure 390 00:15:28,638 --> 00:15:31,641 she'll be right back with it so you can divvy it up, 391 00:15:31,683 --> 00:15:33,100 even steven. 392 00:15:36,730 --> 00:15:38,439 Oh, man, that is rich. 393 00:15:38,481 --> 00:15:40,817 What's supposed to stop her from robbing you guys blind? 394 00:15:40,859 --> 00:15:42,026 What are you gonna do, call the cops? 395 00:15:42,068 --> 00:15:44,278 I'll go with her. Oh, yeah. Good plan. 396 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:46,698 Yeah, leave Hickey here, and the two of you do the deal. 397 00:15:46,740 --> 00:15:49,784 Yeah, what the hell? When did I volunteer for Guantanamo duty 398 00:15:49,826 --> 00:15:54,414 while you two traipse off to the Cuban equivalent of Las Vegas? 399 00:15:54,455 --> 00:15:56,165 Havana, right? 400 00:15:56,207 --> 00:15:58,125 Guys, don't listen to Jeff. He's just trying to divide us. 401 00:15:58,167 --> 00:16:01,379 Says the woman who's willing to take care of the cash by herself. 402 00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:03,590 As if you're Mr. Trustworthy. 403 00:16:03,631 --> 00:16:05,633 Why do you have so much access to rope? 404 00:16:05,675 --> 00:16:08,720 Hey, you're the one who left the door unlocked so Chang could get in here. 405 00:16:08,762 --> 00:16:10,555 How do I know you didn't do that on purpose? 406 00:16:10,597 --> 00:16:11,931 Guys. Guys! 407 00:16:11,972 --> 00:16:13,974 Calm down. 408 00:16:14,016 --> 00:16:17,812 I'm sure we can work this out. We just need to stay cool and talk it through. 409 00:16:19,272 --> 00:16:22,400 I'm sorry. That didn't work out the way I planned. 410 00:16:23,359 --> 00:16:25,319 I'm sorry. 411 00:16:25,361 --> 00:16:27,238 But you didn't leave me any choice. 412 00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:29,616 You were acting very poorly, I didn't know if I could trust you anymore! 413 00:16:29,657 --> 00:16:31,910 You dragged me into this. 414 00:16:31,951 --> 00:16:33,202 I didn't want this. 415 00:16:33,244 --> 00:16:34,954 Huh? 416 00:16:39,584 --> 00:16:41,711 You're packing? Yeah. 417 00:16:41,753 --> 00:16:43,713 You're leaving? Yeah. 418 00:16:43,755 --> 00:16:45,673 Because of last night? Yeah. 419 00:16:45,715 --> 00:16:47,967 I just think there's some unresolved issues here. 420 00:16:48,509 --> 00:16:50,261 You're right. 421 00:16:50,303 --> 00:16:53,222 I'm still really hurt by mom turning her back on me 422 00:16:53,264 --> 00:16:55,433 when I went to rehab. 423 00:16:55,475 --> 00:16:59,813 And I guess part of me was mad at you for siding with her, 424 00:16:59,854 --> 00:17:02,649 so I thought you moving in here was some kind of… 425 00:17:02,690 --> 00:17:04,191 Moral victory. 426 00:17:04,233 --> 00:17:06,152 What? No. 427 00:17:06,193 --> 00:17:08,279 I mean unresolved issues involving the black guy in all these photographs. 428 00:17:08,321 --> 00:17:10,197 Troy? Hey, I don't know his name, man. 429 00:17:10,239 --> 00:17:13,660 I just know he's clearly left some kind of vacuum. 430 00:17:13,701 --> 00:17:15,745 And screw you. What did I have to do with mom? 431 00:17:15,787 --> 00:17:17,664 I was 13. 432 00:17:23,753 --> 00:17:25,880 Hey. Hi. 433 00:17:25,922 --> 00:17:27,173 I'm here to do my third act apology. 434 00:17:27,214 --> 00:17:28,716 Abed, I don't think… Wait. 435 00:17:28,758 --> 00:17:31,302 Don't reject it until the whole thing's been served up. 436 00:17:31,344 --> 00:17:33,429 Dobry. 437 00:17:33,471 --> 00:17:35,431 Open your locker please. 438 00:17:43,022 --> 00:17:45,316 Hey. Hey. 439 00:17:45,358 --> 00:17:47,527 I wanna tell you something. Abed, this is adorable. 440 00:17:47,568 --> 00:17:49,946 Just because it's adorable doesn't mean it's not important. 441 00:17:49,988 --> 00:17:52,490 Listen. 442 00:17:52,532 --> 00:17:54,325 I've been accelerating our relationship 443 00:17:54,367 --> 00:17:56,661 because I've been worried I wouldn't pass a lot of the tests. 444 00:17:56,703 --> 00:17:58,287 I wanted you to move in because I thought 445 00:17:58,329 --> 00:18:00,080 if Annie was around, I'd have less chance of screwing things up. 446 00:18:00,122 --> 00:18:02,041 You're not screwing things up, though. 447 00:18:02,709 --> 00:18:04,752 That's good to know. 448 00:18:04,794 --> 00:18:06,045 But the problem with me will always be 449 00:18:06,086 --> 00:18:07,964 that I can never know for sure. 450 00:18:08,006 --> 00:18:09,131 There's not a huge amount of people in my life 451 00:18:09,173 --> 00:18:11,425 that haven't eventually kicked me out, 452 00:18:11,467 --> 00:18:13,052 and I don't always see it coming. 453 00:18:14,303 --> 00:18:16,430 I don't want it to happen with you. 454 00:18:16,472 --> 00:18:18,683 Well, don't manipulate me and don't keep secrets from me 455 00:18:18,725 --> 00:18:20,351 and we'll probably be okay. 456 00:18:21,435 --> 00:18:23,021 Cool. 457 00:18:23,062 --> 00:18:25,105 It stopped raining. 458 00:18:27,149 --> 00:18:28,902 Yeah, it sure did. 459 00:18:31,946 --> 00:18:34,156 Aw, you hired a stunt person. 460 00:18:34,198 --> 00:18:35,700 No, I did not. 461 00:18:38,703 --> 00:18:39,746 Where'd you get these? 462 00:18:39,787 --> 00:18:42,415 They were an inheritance from my father. 463 00:18:42,456 --> 00:18:44,333 He was a collector. Mmm-hmm. 464 00:18:45,001 --> 00:18:47,127 How many? 120. 465 00:18:47,169 --> 00:18:49,129 Well, for the whole bunch, maybe 20. 466 00:18:49,171 --> 00:18:50,464 Thousand? Dollars. 467 00:18:50,506 --> 00:18:52,550 $20,000? Twenty non thousand dollars. 468 00:18:52,592 --> 00:18:55,553 20 regular dollars. You might get that from a recycling place. 469 00:18:55,595 --> 00:18:58,765 These are misprints, honey. Check out page 105. 470 00:18:58,806 --> 00:19:00,975 Well, I can't because there's no page numbers. 471 00:19:01,017 --> 00:19:03,603 Ah! Well, that would be a problem. 472 00:19:03,644 --> 00:19:06,272 You know, "Class, turn to page there is no page… 473 00:19:06,313 --> 00:19:09,233 "Oh, well, if there's no page number, you can't turn to it." 474 00:19:09,275 --> 00:19:11,027 I've better things to do with my life. 475 00:19:27,418 --> 00:19:28,753 Although we haven't been saying it, 476 00:19:28,795 --> 00:19:31,047 Troy was an important part of our apartment. 477 00:19:31,672 --> 00:19:32,617 He kept the peace. 478 00:19:32,632 --> 00:19:34,174 Yeah. 479 00:19:34,216 --> 00:19:36,719 Goin' a little crazy without him. 480 00:19:36,761 --> 00:19:39,472 Maybe we need to live with a therapist. 481 00:19:39,513 --> 00:19:41,223 Or at least someone crazier than us. 482 00:19:49,356 --> 00:19:50,650 Let's give Craigslist another try. 483 00:19:50,691 --> 00:19:51,776 I think Craigslist is the way to go. 484 00:19:51,818 --> 00:19:53,861 Yeah, that's a good idea. Yeah. 485 00:19:53,903 --> 00:19:55,905 Are you guys all wearing the same clothes from yesterday? 486 00:19:55,947 --> 00:19:57,197 We've been through some stuff. 487 00:19:57,239 --> 00:19:59,700 But we learned something. No, we didn't. 488 00:19:59,742 --> 00:20:01,995 We learned that sometimes there's no lesson. 489 00:20:02,036 --> 00:20:04,122 How is that learning? We played Pile of bullets. 490 00:20:04,163 --> 00:20:05,205 Can we just get this meeting over with? 491 00:20:05,247 --> 00:20:06,582 So how'd the cleanup go? 492 00:20:06,624 --> 00:20:07,610 I learned how to smile. 493 00:20:07,625 --> 00:20:09,293 Don't step, don't step to me. 494 00:20:09,335 --> 00:20:11,754 I like coffee and water, don't step to me. 495 00:20:11,796 --> 00:20:13,798 Uh, damn it! I lost it. 496 00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:15,466 I lost it! 497 00:20:17,551 --> 00:20:19,053 Okay. 498 00:20:19,095 --> 00:20:21,639 I will get back to you. Thanks. 499 00:20:21,681 --> 00:20:23,557 Who was that, sweetie? 500 00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:26,185 Guess they want me for that Wild West videotape board game thing. 501 00:20:27,394 --> 00:20:29,647 Pile of bullets? Yeah. 502 00:20:31,732 --> 00:20:33,734 Devin, you pick up that phone right now 503 00:20:33,776 --> 00:20:36,154 and you call these people and you tell 'em you want this part. 504 00:20:36,195 --> 00:20:39,907 These VCR games is where everything is headed. 505 00:20:39,949 --> 00:20:41,283 Can't you see that? 506 00:20:41,325 --> 00:20:45,204 You just became the Luke Skywalker 507 00:20:45,245 --> 00:20:46,497 of the new Star Wars. 508 00:20:46,539 --> 00:20:48,207 We've gotta move. We do? 509 00:20:48,248 --> 00:20:49,333 Oh, yes, indeedy. 510 00:20:49,375 --> 00:20:52,003 We have got to move to Los Angeles. 511 00:20:52,045 --> 00:20:53,546 But I work here. 512 00:20:53,587 --> 00:20:54,797 Oh, please. 513 00:20:54,839 --> 00:20:56,799 You call Apple Computers work? 514 00:20:56,841 --> 00:20:59,052 What kind of company offers stock options 515 00:20:59,093 --> 00:21:01,220 as a Christmas bonus? 516 00:21:01,261 --> 00:21:02,805 That ship is sinkin'. 517 00:21:04,807 --> 00:21:07,935 Sweetie, remember when we were talkin' about trying cocaine? 518 00:21:07,977 --> 00:21:09,687 Yeah… 519 00:21:09,729 --> 00:21:12,899 I think we should start looking for some right now. 520 00:21:12,940 --> 00:21:15,902 Because we're gonna be able to afford it. 521 00:21:15,943 --> 00:21:18,029 Okay. I mean, if you're sure. 522 00:21:18,071 --> 00:21:20,656 I've never been more sure about anything in my entire life. 523 00:21:21,782 --> 00:21:23,784 Pile of Bullets. 524 00:21:23,826 --> 00:21:24,952 Pile of Bullets. 525 00:21:26,204 --> 00:21:27,496 Oh, yes! 526 00:21:28,581 --> 00:21:29,581 Did you get any of that?