1
00:00:01,660 --> 00:00:03,822
Troy and Abed back from summer.

2
00:00:07,177 --> 00:00:08,994
Wait a minute.
Something's changed.

3
00:00:09,008 --> 00:00:10,873
Oh, there's 12 additional
thumb tacks on that board.

4
00:00:10,885 --> 00:00:11,885
They're driving me crazy.

5
00:00:13,010 --> 00:00:15,963
No, I meant this.
Trying out the hipster look.

6
00:00:16,139 --> 00:00:18,341
It's cool, but also not.

7
00:00:19,224 --> 00:00:20,931
Hey, guys, have a good summer?

8
00:00:20,975 --> 00:00:22,664
Take them off.

9
00:00:24,048 --> 00:00:26,277
Happy first day of school.

10
00:00:26,548 --> 00:00:27,849
Oh.

11
00:00:27,862 --> 00:00:30,340
Good morning.
I brought brownies.

12
00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:32,968
Oh.

13
00:00:33,355 --> 00:00:37,033
Congratulations, it's me.

14
00:00:38,247 --> 00:00:41,249
Huh, I see we've all reinvented
ourselves over the summer.

15
00:00:41,282 --> 00:00:43,132
A little late
to the hipster party much?

16
00:00:43,152 --> 00:00:45,070
A little much on the much much?

17
00:00:46,433 --> 00:00:48,550
We should get to class?
Where's Pierce?

18
00:00:48,581 --> 00:00:50,416
- I don't know.
- Hey-o!

19
00:00:52,363 --> 00:00:53,631
Sorry, I'm late.

20
00:00:53,662 --> 00:00:56,004
Damn Mexican cleaning woman
did a cha-cha

21
00:00:56,023 --> 00:00:58,788
on my glasses,
so I got to wear this old pair.

22
00:01:01,967 --> 00:01:04,686
Abed.
Abed.

23
00:01:04,717 --> 00:01:06,890
- Abed.
- Yup.

24
00:01:06,921 --> 00:01:07,990
Did you go to your happy place?

25
00:01:08,022 --> 00:01:09,055
- Yeah.
- Did you envision

26
00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:11,100
a babbling brook
like I described?

27
00:01:11,118 --> 00:01:12,284
I started out
with a babbling brook,

28
00:01:12,313 --> 00:01:13,934
but then I layered in elements
from our world.

29
00:01:13,965 --> 00:01:15,699
I'm sure fans of the babbling
brook will complain,

30
00:01:15,716 --> 00:01:16,962
but I thought
that was limiting.

31
00:01:16,986 --> 00:01:18,397
Well, it's best
to keep it simple.

32
00:01:18,421 --> 00:01:19,953
- It was a babbling brook.
- Okay.

33
00:01:19,988 --> 00:01:21,650
Here's the deal, Jessica Biel.

34
00:01:21,678 --> 00:01:24,796
The first day of senior year
is emotional for everyone,

35
00:01:24,835 --> 00:01:27,009
so I hereby therapize you to go

36
00:01:27,022 --> 00:01:30,047
to your happy place
whenever you feel stressed.

37
00:01:30,223 --> 00:01:33,525
- I found my lucky notebook.
- Found my lucky charm.

38
00:01:33,582 --> 00:01:37,157
Abed, you ready for our last
first day of school?

39
00:01:37,619 --> 00:01:39,337
Are you ready, buddy?

40
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:42,746
I just need a minute.

41
00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:10,441
Abed's Happy Community College
show is filmed

42
00:02:10,472 --> 00:02:12,923
before a live audience
inside of my head.

43
00:02:16,389 --> 00:02:18,232
I can't believe we're finally
getting into this class.

44
00:02:18,270 --> 00:02:21,023
I can't believe there's a class called
"The History of Ice Cream."

45
00:02:21,077 --> 00:02:23,400
Seniors!

46
00:02:24,105 --> 00:02:26,140
There they are.

47
00:02:29,313 --> 00:02:31,280
- Seniors!
- Oh, speaking of seniors,

48
00:02:31,306 --> 00:02:33,661
I've decided I'm going
to do senioritis this year.

49
00:02:33,687 --> 00:02:36,651
You know, just hangin' out
and blowin' off classes,

50
00:02:36,679 --> 00:02:39,299
pullin' pranks,
not sayin' my "G" s.

51
00:02:39,343 --> 00:02:41,764
Ooh, I'll pull
some pranks with you.

52
00:02:41,931 --> 00:02:44,115
Okay.
Or Jeff or whoever.

53
00:02:44,146 --> 00:02:45,446
You know, whoever's around.
Whatever.

54
00:02:45,470 --> 00:02:47,104
So, Abed, after class,
we're still doing

55
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:49,044
our first-day-of-school tradition, right?
- You know it.

56
00:02:49,075 --> 00:02:50,375
We like to make wishes
in the fountain.

57
00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:52,230
- Ohh!
- Fellas, I hate to tell you,

58
00:02:52,261 --> 00:02:53,682
wishes aren't real.

59
00:02:53,719 --> 00:02:56,437
If you want something bad,
you have to work for it.

60
00:02:56,733 --> 00:02:57,733
Or use a spell.

61
00:02:57,758 --> 00:02:59,013
All of our wishes come true.

62
00:02:59,044 --> 00:03:01,829
Last year, Troy wished we got
Bin Laden and the Dorito Taco.

63
00:03:01,870 --> 00:03:03,638
Yeah, but Obama got credit
for both.

64
00:03:03,670 --> 00:03:05,770
Could you wish for Jeff
to be on time for once?

65
00:03:05,813 --> 00:03:08,141
No. No wasting wishes
on impossibilities.

66
00:03:08,352 --> 00:03:09,758
We have to make
this year count,

67
00:03:09,779 --> 00:03:11,080
especially
since it's the last one.

68
00:03:13,519 --> 00:03:16,250
Oh, no, is all this
for "The History of Ice Cream"?

69
00:03:16,273 --> 00:03:18,600
They overbooked it, so it's
first come, first serve now.

70
00:03:18,631 --> 00:03:20,060
Oh, just like real ice cream.

71
00:03:20,081 --> 00:03:22,944
- Guys, over here!
- Oh, Jeffrey.

72
00:03:27,206 --> 00:03:29,108
Jeff, I can't believe
that you came early.

73
00:03:29,137 --> 00:03:30,510
Don't you read
Gary's twitter feed?

74
00:03:30,535 --> 00:03:32,219
He posted a crisis alert
about it.

75
00:03:32,237 --> 00:03:33,622
I came early to save seats.

76
00:03:33,686 --> 00:03:36,822
Oh, you know what, girls,
I gave you the old flyer.

77
00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:39,375
"Instagram for besties"
is in room 44.

78
00:03:39,912 --> 00:03:42,447
Showing up early,
helping others,

79
00:03:42,483 --> 00:03:44,057
sending girls away?

80
00:03:44,167 --> 00:03:46,275
Could this be
a whole new Jeff Winger?

81
00:03:46,303 --> 00:03:48,097
Don't ruin it by approving it.

82
00:03:52,549 --> 00:03:54,417
Oh, so that's progressed.

83
00:03:54,462 --> 00:03:55,966
I mean, it's progressed,

84
00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:57,896
but it hasn't
progressed-progressed.

85
00:03:57,929 --> 00:03:58,960
It's progressive.

86
00:03:58,989 --> 00:04:01,023
- Good luck, Troy.
- Hey!

87
00:04:01,043 --> 00:04:02,962
You can't just walk in here!

88
00:04:03,007 --> 00:04:05,144
I've been pissing in jars
for an hour

89
00:04:05,175 --> 00:04:06,525
trying to keep this seat.

90
00:04:06,543 --> 00:04:07,960
- Oh.
- Too bad, Leonard.

91
00:04:07,998 --> 00:04:09,815
All right, all right.

92
00:04:09,847 --> 00:04:12,182
All right.
Simmer Dean.

93
00:04:12,213 --> 00:04:14,314
This can't be good.
He's dressed as himself.

94
00:04:14,339 --> 00:04:17,733
Apparently Greendale's registration
system has been hacked.

95
00:04:17,831 --> 00:04:20,081
That's right.
Someone hacked

96
00:04:20,110 --> 00:04:22,163
into the supply closet
and counterfeited

97
00:04:22,176 --> 00:04:24,485
these "History of Ice Cream"
admission cards.

98
00:04:25,347 --> 00:04:28,043
Whoever did this is very good.

99
00:04:28,112 --> 00:04:30,786
There is only one fair way
to solve this.

100
00:04:30,823 --> 00:04:35,168
So follow me to...

101
00:04:57,773 --> 00:05:01,098
The Hunger Deans!

102
00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:02,863
Thank you.
Thank you.

103
00:05:02,895 --> 00:05:05,146
There are 35 tests of strength

104
00:05:05,172 --> 00:05:06,171
and agility.

105
00:05:06,202 --> 00:05:08,822
The winner of each one
of these contests

106
00:05:08,840 --> 00:05:11,373
will be awarded
a red rubber ball.

107
00:05:11,391 --> 00:05:13,487
No ball, no ice cream.

108
00:05:13,534 --> 00:05:15,978
And these are impossible
to counterfeit

109
00:05:16,013 --> 00:05:20,375
because each one has been marked
by my distinct bite print.

110
00:05:20,541 --> 00:05:22,476
- Oh, lord, no.
- Yes.

111
00:05:22,519 --> 00:05:24,113
Guys, we need
to take this class.

112
00:05:24,151 --> 00:05:26,019
It's the only History credit
this semester.

113
00:05:26,039 --> 00:05:28,374
Whatevs.
We'll take it next semes.

114
00:05:28,706 --> 00:05:29,962
Ter.
Semester.

115
00:05:30,007 --> 00:05:31,775
But I need it now.

116
00:05:31,857 --> 00:05:34,794
Okay, I took
some extra classes online,

117
00:05:34,841 --> 00:05:36,707
and I'm one history credit away
from graduating.

118
00:05:37,607 --> 00:05:39,444
Jeff, you're graduating early?

119
00:05:39,487 --> 00:05:42,317
Well, graduating after 30
can't be characterized as early.

120
00:05:42,353 --> 00:05:44,822
- When were you gonna tell us, Jeff?
- I was working on a speech.

121
00:05:44,871 --> 00:05:47,506
And, believe me, it tied in
a lot of things.

122
00:05:47,533 --> 00:05:50,022
There was a lot of resolutions
and epiphanies.

123
00:05:50,040 --> 00:05:51,828
And it would have gone down
a lot better

124
00:05:51,894 --> 00:05:54,269
after we had taken
the ice cream class together.

125
00:05:54,290 --> 00:05:55,761
So that's why you were holding
our seats?

126
00:05:55,801 --> 00:05:57,195
For your own selfish reasons?

127
00:05:57,229 --> 00:05:59,263
No, I want us
to take the class together.

128
00:05:59,290 --> 00:06:01,502
I just want it to be
the last class we take together.

129
00:06:01,533 --> 00:06:03,286
I probably should have phrased

130
00:06:03,306 --> 00:06:05,029
- that differently.
- Fine. Win your red ball.

131
00:06:05,047 --> 00:06:07,652
What do I care?
I've got a senior prank to pull.

132
00:06:07,673 --> 00:06:08,836
- Shirley.
- Mm-hmm.

133
00:06:08,864 --> 00:06:10,364
So, Abed, ready
to make some wishes?

134
00:06:10,384 --> 00:06:12,660
Make chocolate hot dogs
a reality?

135
00:06:12,684 --> 00:06:13,850
Actually, why don't you go
with Britta?

136
00:06:13,871 --> 00:06:15,212
I think I'll just hang out here
and watch.

137
00:06:15,230 --> 00:06:16,563
Really?
Are you sure?

138
00:06:16,613 --> 00:06:19,582
- Yeah, I'm fine.
- F-i-n-e or f-y-n-e?

139
00:06:19,909 --> 00:06:21,610
We made one of 'em a code
for "not fine."

140
00:06:21,659 --> 00:06:24,542
- Oh.
- F-y-n-e.

141
00:06:24,592 --> 00:06:26,373
Okay, he's fine.
Let's go.

142
00:06:26,529 --> 00:06:28,448
- See you around, old Jeff.
- No.

143
00:06:28,478 --> 00:06:31,327
New Jeff. New Jeff does not
just look out for himself.

144
00:06:31,370 --> 00:06:33,336
New Jeff is gonna win
seven red balls

145
00:06:33,361 --> 00:06:35,158
because he is not gonna take
that class

146
00:06:35,183 --> 00:06:36,864
unless you guys are with me.

147
00:06:36,958 --> 00:06:39,843
Look, we're gonna have
to leave this place sometime.

148
00:06:39,931 --> 00:06:41,898
Like an ice cream cone melting

149
00:06:41,922 --> 00:06:45,325
in the sun, our time here
can't last forever.

150
00:06:45,614 --> 00:06:47,764
That was part of the speech
I was writing!

151
00:06:50,153 --> 00:06:51,337
Hey, guys.
What's going on?

152
00:06:51,388 --> 00:06:53,450
Oh, just making plans
for the future.

153
00:06:53,487 --> 00:06:56,031
Can't stay
at Greendale forever.

154
00:06:56,068 --> 00:06:57,536
Hey, is mine different
than yours?

155
00:06:59,470 --> 00:07:00,895
Look out below.

156
00:07:00,931 --> 00:07:04,471
Coming in for a land-Dean.

157
00:07:06,625 --> 00:07:07,757
Amelia Earhart?

158
00:07:07,779 --> 00:07:10,397
Close.
I am America's sexiest aviator,

159
00:07:10,424 --> 00:07:12,401
Leo DiCaprio.

160
00:07:12,977 --> 00:07:15,442
And, just as his character
lost his mind,

161
00:07:15,545 --> 00:07:18,548
so have I lost
your student records.

162
00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:21,144
What?
I can't believe it.

163
00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:23,972
Yeah, Amelia Earhart
would have been faster.

164
00:07:24,475 --> 00:07:27,096
As you know,
our student records are stored

165
00:07:27,128 --> 00:07:30,232
on a Microsoft Paint file,
which I was assured

166
00:07:30,256 --> 00:07:32,006
was future-proof.

167
00:07:33,169 --> 00:07:35,113
Meanwhile,
our extended warranty

168
00:07:35,117 --> 00:07:37,949
is not being honored by the restaurant
that used to be Circuit City.

169
00:07:39,378 --> 00:07:41,922
But I think the fairest way
to handle this

170
00:07:41,972 --> 00:07:45,113
is to have everyone repeat
the last three years.

171
00:07:45,457 --> 00:07:46,778
You can't be serious.

172
00:07:46,811 --> 00:07:48,945
In-Dean, I am.

173
00:07:50,497 --> 00:07:52,166
I'm gonna be here forever.

174
00:07:52,195 --> 00:07:55,957
Forever.
Forever. Forever.

175
00:07:56,576 --> 00:07:58,933
I'm gonna stay in here forever.

176
00:08:03,614 --> 00:08:06,736
Gentlemen... and ladies.

177
00:08:06,988 --> 00:08:08,438
My first red ball

178
00:08:08,460 --> 00:08:10,277
is way up high.

179
00:08:10,308 --> 00:08:12,125
To touch my ball,

180
00:08:12,157 --> 00:08:14,509
first touch the sky.

181
00:08:14,647 --> 00:08:16,064
Go!

182
00:08:17,296 --> 00:08:18,365
Give it up, Leonard.

183
00:08:18,396 --> 00:08:21,425
I'm gonna eat
your ice cream, Winger.

184
00:08:21,573 --> 00:08:24,336
Agh!
You? You're pre-med!

185
00:08:24,361 --> 00:08:25,814
- I want ice cream.
- Yeah, well, I want

186
00:08:25,837 --> 00:08:27,684
to graduate with dignity.

187
00:08:27,959 --> 00:08:29,174
Not cool!

188
00:08:32,353 --> 00:08:34,304
Jeff's really going
after that ball.

189
00:08:34,573 --> 00:08:37,065
There's got to be a joke
in there somewhere.

190
00:08:37,264 --> 00:08:38,547
That's my first ball.

191
00:08:38,604 --> 00:08:40,304
New Jeff!

192
00:08:41,274 --> 00:08:43,230
Give me a minute.
Give me a minute.

193
00:08:45,693 --> 00:08:47,213
No.

194
00:08:48,786 --> 00:08:50,950
You know, if we're doing the
first three years over again,

195
00:08:50,968 --> 00:08:52,238
I could change majors.

196
00:08:52,276 --> 00:08:54,684
I've always been curious
about Forensics.

197
00:08:54,781 --> 00:08:56,606
Hey, did you know
you could major in Antics?

198
00:08:56,642 --> 00:08:58,361
I checked.
You need a tomfoolery pre-req,

199
00:08:58,392 --> 00:08:59,942
but they waive it for women.

200
00:09:01,251 --> 00:09:02,320
This is lunacy.

201
00:09:02,358 --> 00:09:04,086
We are not gonna start over
as freshmen.

202
00:09:04,111 --> 00:09:06,062
Hey, there's
a freshman mixer tonight.

203
00:09:06,088 --> 00:09:07,218
Are you guys freshmen?

204
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:09,571
We can be.

205
00:09:22,119 --> 00:09:23,988
This prank is amazing.

206
00:09:24,011 --> 00:09:26,424
He's gonna come in here later
and have the creepy feeling

207
00:09:26,448 --> 00:09:28,270
someone was in here.

208
00:09:28,349 --> 00:09:29,561
We should go
before we get caught.

209
00:09:29,580 --> 00:09:31,411
Well, aren't we gonna do
something now that we're here?

210
00:09:31,434 --> 00:09:33,135
Do something?

211
00:09:33,498 --> 00:09:35,273
All right.

212
00:09:35,342 --> 00:09:37,877
A prank on a prank.

213
00:09:37,908 --> 00:09:40,838
Let's move everything
on his desk over an inch

214
00:09:40,863 --> 00:09:42,226
except his stapler.

215
00:09:42,250 --> 00:09:43,850
Then he'll think
we moved his stapler.

216
00:09:43,859 --> 00:09:45,482
Oh, my God, there's
so many levels to this.

217
00:09:45,513 --> 00:09:47,648
How about we fill his car
with popcorn?

218
00:09:47,668 --> 00:09:49,358
That sounds messy.

219
00:09:49,606 --> 00:09:52,784
That sounds messy!

220
00:09:52,822 --> 00:09:55,641
Okay, keys.
Keys.

221
00:09:56,038 --> 00:09:58,006
Okay, I'm the Dean.

222
00:09:58,426 --> 00:09:59,509
I come into my office,

223
00:09:59,553 --> 00:10:00,582
turn on the light.

224
00:10:00,613 --> 00:10:03,865
"Oh, my, did my stapler
grow legs and move?"

225
00:10:04,018 --> 00:10:07,106
Then come over here for coffee.

226
00:10:07,198 --> 00:10:10,652
I would hide my keys

227
00:10:10,682 --> 00:10:15,414
in...
Huh.

228
00:10:15,759 --> 00:10:17,126
Oh.

229
00:10:20,464 --> 00:10:23,250
- Heels.
- Oh, you got skills.

230
00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:24,872
Oh.

231
00:10:24,985 --> 00:10:27,285
- Look who got his ball.
- Not my ball.

232
00:10:27,316 --> 00:10:28,135
Your ball.

233
00:10:28,161 --> 00:10:29,423
I just wanted you guys
to see it.

234
00:10:29,441 --> 00:10:31,793
- New Jeff.
- Jeffrey, is that blood on your shirt?

235
00:10:31,814 --> 00:10:33,064
Oh, no, it's cool.
It's Leonard's.

236
00:10:33,077 --> 00:10:34,676
Oh.
Oh.

237
00:10:35,732 --> 00:10:37,468
Two balls!

238
00:10:38,334 --> 00:10:42,069
This is gonna be so good
when I finally get it.

239
00:10:44,517 --> 00:10:46,395
It's a little weird
doing this without Abed.

240
00:10:46,482 --> 00:10:48,038
Come on.
It'll be fun.

241
00:10:48,063 --> 00:10:50,166
I'll put my...
my Britta twist on it.

242
00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:54,586
I got skills.
I got skills.

243
00:10:54,957 --> 00:10:56,547
- Sorry.
- Let's get this started.

244
00:10:56,572 --> 00:10:57,822
We always do
the first one together.

245
00:10:57,849 --> 00:10:59,603
One, two, three.

246
00:10:59,641 --> 00:11:01,401
- I wish for a great school year.
- I wish for 1,000 wishes.

247
00:11:01,432 --> 00:11:03,070
Great school year?

248
00:11:03,195 --> 00:11:04,939
The first wish
is always for 1,000 wishes.

249
00:11:04,977 --> 00:11:06,260
But we have all these coins.

250
00:11:06,273 --> 00:11:08,268
Yeah, but the coins
aren't the wishes.

251
00:11:08,311 --> 00:11:09,811
Oh, I didn't know that.

252
00:11:09,884 --> 00:11:13,837
I wish for Britta to have 499
of my remaining wishes.

253
00:11:13,863 --> 00:11:15,447
Thank you.

254
00:11:15,542 --> 00:11:17,298
I wish to end all wars.

255
00:11:17,324 --> 00:11:18,372
That's another rule.

256
00:11:18,397 --> 00:11:20,297
No wishes
containing the word "all."

257
00:11:20,379 --> 00:11:21,979
Guaranteed ironic consequences.

258
00:11:22,005 --> 00:11:23,922
I don't think
anyone's gonna miss wars.

259
00:11:23,948 --> 00:11:25,767
Uhm, Star Wars, Thumb Wars,

260
00:11:25,791 --> 00:11:27,792
wow, Storage Wars!

261
00:11:27,831 --> 00:11:29,432
Fine.

262
00:11:29,714 --> 00:11:30,909
You can't get in the fountain.

263
00:11:30,934 --> 00:11:32,801
- I'm taking that penny back.
- I already told you,

264
00:11:32,839 --> 00:11:33,949
the pennies aren't wishes.

265
00:11:33,977 --> 00:11:35,394
You can't flip a wish.

266
00:11:35,421 --> 00:11:37,896
- That's ridiculous.
- Your rules are ridiculous.

267
00:11:37,921 --> 00:11:39,608
They're Abed's rules.

268
00:11:39,638 --> 00:11:41,507
And they're awesome,
and they always work.

269
00:11:41,551 --> 00:11:44,137
Well, Abed's not here, so...

270
00:11:44,712 --> 00:11:45,670
Unwish!

271
00:11:45,701 --> 00:11:47,673
- You can't do that.
- I just did.

272
00:11:47,808 --> 00:11:49,431
- Unwish!
- No! Rewish.

273
00:11:49,456 --> 00:11:51,906
- Ununwish.
- Give me it! Unwish!

274
00:11:51,946 --> 00:11:53,697
No!

275
00:11:53,763 --> 00:11:55,380
No!
Oh, I'm sorry.

276
00:11:55,418 --> 00:11:56,886
What... you're helping me!

277
00:11:56,912 --> 00:11:58,969
You're helping.
I like it.

278
00:11:59,251 --> 00:12:01,233
- Unwish! Unwish!
- Oh, God!

279
00:12:01,271 --> 00:12:02,771
Why does this feel good?

280
00:12:03,102 --> 00:12:05,171
Stupid, selfish Jeff

281
00:12:05,201 --> 00:12:07,603
coming here,
ruining our senior year.

282
00:12:07,651 --> 00:12:09,814
Ah, great!
My "G" s are back.

283
00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:11,497
Yes, it's crummy
that Jeff is leaving early,

284
00:12:11,529 --> 00:12:13,230
but we're all graduating
eventually.

285
00:12:13,249 --> 00:12:14,438
But why the rush?

286
00:12:14,462 --> 00:12:17,264
What, so Jeff can run off
and be a gross lawyer again?

287
00:12:17,300 --> 00:12:18,980
Troy and Abed
start drinking coffee?

288
00:12:18,999 --> 00:12:21,566
I become
a boring hospital administrator?

289
00:12:21,585 --> 00:12:23,866
- Who wants to do that?
- You do. Right?

290
00:12:23,897 --> 00:12:26,315
Yay, hospital administration!

291
00:12:26,366 --> 00:12:28,034
Can't wait to be buried alive

292
00:12:28,048 --> 00:12:30,015
under a pile of paperwork
and bed pans,

293
00:12:30,034 --> 00:12:32,602
just trying to summon the
courage to ask out Dr. Patel,

294
00:12:32,635 --> 00:12:35,571
the gorgeous Indian neurosurgeon
who doesn't even know I exist.

295
00:12:35,597 --> 00:12:37,208
This isn't a conversation,
is it?

296
00:12:37,221 --> 00:12:40,611
Whoo-hoo! The sad, slow march
toward death begins.

297
00:12:43,153 --> 00:12:44,742
Senioritis!

298
00:12:44,781 --> 00:12:47,483
Ready, set...

299
00:12:53,370 --> 00:12:55,233
Third ball.

300
00:13:00,642 --> 00:13:02,307
Fourth ball.

301
00:13:10,650 --> 00:13:12,851
Well, well, well.

302
00:13:13,628 --> 00:13:16,009
Looks like someone wants
to be a hero.

303
00:13:16,039 --> 00:13:18,040
A big man.
A huge, throbbing, sweaty...

304
00:13:18,073 --> 00:13:20,542
Dean, I just want to get my history
credit and get out of here.

305
00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:22,761
And I just need to know
how bad you want it.

306
00:13:22,852 --> 00:13:25,137
The next competition
will be particularly difficult

307
00:13:25,156 --> 00:13:27,591
for some of you
because... It requires

308
00:13:27,617 --> 00:13:29,555
complete emotional commitment.

309
00:13:29,641 --> 00:13:31,136
The Tango.

310
00:13:31,181 --> 00:13:32,278
I will be the judge.

311
00:13:32,315 --> 00:13:33,431
There can only be one winner,

312
00:13:33,452 --> 00:13:35,046
so choose your partners wisely.

313
00:13:35,116 --> 00:13:36,283
Come on, Winger.

314
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:37,599
It's water
under the bridge, right?

315
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:38,867
- Partners?
- Sorry.

316
00:13:38,892 --> 00:13:40,109
My dance card's full.

317
00:13:40,179 --> 00:13:43,521
For my partner
in the Tango competition,

318
00:13:43,938 --> 00:13:45,555
I choose...

319
00:13:46,011 --> 00:13:46,881
The Dean.

320
00:13:48,313 --> 00:13:49,956
The fountain works.

321
00:13:57,887 --> 00:13:59,271
All these balls.

322
00:13:59,814 --> 00:14:02,350
I'm so close, I can taste it.

323
00:14:06,673 --> 00:14:09,309
Pierce, only you could turn
a freshman mixer

324
00:14:09,316 --> 00:14:10,566
into a disaster.

325
00:14:10,567 --> 00:14:12,948
I was this close
to getting those two girls.

326
00:14:12,981 --> 00:14:15,184
Jeff, look how close you're
holding your fingers together.

327
00:14:15,238 --> 00:14:16,789
That's your penis.

328
00:14:18,114 --> 00:14:19,730
Guys, great news.

329
00:14:19,786 --> 00:14:21,453
After just one Forensics class,

330
00:14:21,461 --> 00:14:23,712
I found a way
to retrieve our student records.

331
00:14:23,725 --> 00:14:25,309
It turns out there's a backup.

332
00:14:25,335 --> 00:14:26,502
And it's in this safe.

333
00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:34,823
I have a theory, Dean.

334
00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:36,247
Do tell.

335
00:14:36,309 --> 00:14:38,397
I don't think
you want me to graduate.

336
00:14:39,011 --> 00:14:40,624
Don't be absurd, Jeffrey.

337
00:14:40,713 --> 00:14:43,117
I want success
for all Greendale students.

338
00:14:43,159 --> 00:14:45,203
Oh, really?
Then answer me this.

339
00:14:45,268 --> 00:14:47,436
What happened
to the other History class?

340
00:14:47,718 --> 00:14:50,056
What other History class?

341
00:14:50,357 --> 00:14:51,762
The second History class,

342
00:14:51,780 --> 00:14:53,543
the one
that actually taught History,

343
00:14:53,582 --> 00:14:55,587
that disappeared
from the schedule

344
00:14:55,609 --> 00:14:57,427
after I took summer classes.

345
00:14:57,453 --> 00:14:59,471
Oh, you're telling yourself
a fantasy.

346
00:14:59,503 --> 00:15:02,165
Who really made those
counterfeited ice cream tickets?

347
00:15:02,193 --> 00:15:04,692
Who's so good
that they got your handwriting

348
00:15:04,718 --> 00:15:06,853
with its hearts and flourishes?

349
00:15:07,154 --> 00:15:08,629
Oh, God, you're right.

350
00:15:08,730 --> 00:15:10,141
I can't let you go, Jeffrey.

351
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:11,525
You weren't supposed
to compete.

352
00:15:11,551 --> 00:15:13,908
You were supposed to walk away
with the rest of the study group.

353
00:15:14,038 --> 00:15:16,590
You can't not get rid of me
that easily.

354
00:15:16,868 --> 00:15:19,997
Oh, God, why'd I make it
feats of strength and grace?

355
00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:23,525
It's as if I wanted you to win.

356
00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:26,478
But that can't be true.

357
00:15:28,403 --> 00:15:29,854
Smile.

358
00:15:29,894 --> 00:15:31,271
Best friends!

359
00:15:37,871 --> 00:15:40,458
Let's hug it out.
Okay.

360
00:15:41,236 --> 00:15:43,676
Here.
One more ball to go.

361
00:15:43,806 --> 00:15:46,619
But it's another dance contest,
so I think I got it.

362
00:15:47,640 --> 00:15:49,140
What's wrong with Abed?

363
00:15:54,439 --> 00:15:55,895
No, no, no, no,
don't open the safe.

364
00:15:55,936 --> 00:15:57,203
We're redoing
our first three years.

365
00:15:57,236 --> 00:15:59,279
- That's what I want.
- It's okay, Abed.

366
00:15:59,317 --> 00:16:01,802
Here's a trick I use
when I feel overwhelmed.

367
00:16:01,861 --> 00:16:03,881
Just imagine a happy place

368
00:16:03,912 --> 00:16:05,892
and then go there.

369
00:16:21,339 --> 00:16:24,541
Greendale babies
will be right back forever!

370
00:16:28,599 --> 00:16:31,228
Pierce, what did you do
to Abed?

371
00:16:31,852 --> 00:16:33,089
Gay balls!

372
00:16:33,116 --> 00:16:34,760
Nailed it.

373
00:16:36,341 --> 00:16:38,259
- Don't ask.
- Don't tell.

374
00:16:38,304 --> 00:16:41,090
Poor Abed. Is he
in his imagination emporium?

375
00:16:41,133 --> 00:16:43,713
Dreamatorium. No, this seems
like something new.

376
00:16:43,729 --> 00:16:47,450
Abed was having some anxiety
about all the changes this year,

377
00:16:47,481 --> 00:16:51,064
so I may have told him to go
to a happy place in his mind.

378
00:16:51,128 --> 00:16:53,933
You told him to go somewhere
in his mind?

379
00:16:53,976 --> 00:16:55,558
Do you realize
who you told that to?

380
00:16:55,577 --> 00:16:57,637
The last competition
to win a red ball

381
00:16:57,668 --> 00:16:59,181
begins in one minute.

382
00:16:59,213 --> 00:17:00,721
Honestly, Jeff, you can go.

383
00:17:00,764 --> 00:17:02,958
No one will think
you're selfish.

384
00:17:03,895 --> 00:17:04,978
This looks bad.

385
00:17:04,997 --> 00:17:06,998
I wish I hadn't broken Abed.

386
00:17:07,035 --> 00:17:09,919
There is one thing
we could try.

387
00:17:10,820 --> 00:17:12,785
Oh, okay.

388
00:17:20,018 --> 00:17:21,652
Hey, let's play Pretend.

389
00:17:21,703 --> 00:17:23,307
Yeah, we could be cowboys.

390
00:17:23,325 --> 00:17:24,775
We could be spacemen.

391
00:17:28,060 --> 00:17:31,096
That's right, baby Pierce.
We can play forever.

392
00:17:32,310 --> 00:17:34,449
- It's not working.
- What's not working?

393
00:17:34,507 --> 00:17:38,026
Okay, contestants, final
competition begins right now.

394
00:17:38,741 --> 00:17:41,448
God, I hate new Jeff.

395
00:17:42,745 --> 00:17:45,266
Hey, guys,
I have something to say.

396
00:17:45,298 --> 00:17:47,178
Yay!
Like always!

397
00:17:47,209 --> 00:17:49,260
I was just outside Babyville.

398
00:17:49,333 --> 00:17:50,854
There's nothing
outside Babyville.

399
00:17:50,885 --> 00:17:52,786
You know what, there is!

400
00:17:53,061 --> 00:17:54,535
And it was scary,

401
00:17:54,575 --> 00:17:56,922
because change is always scary.

402
00:17:57,335 --> 00:17:59,022
But then I thought of you guys,

403
00:17:59,073 --> 00:18:00,978
and I wasn't so scared.

404
00:18:01,012 --> 00:18:02,794
Abed, when you brought
this group together,

405
00:18:02,819 --> 00:18:06,289
you changed our lives,
but then we changed each other.

406
00:18:06,403 --> 00:18:08,650
And we're gonna keep changing
in unexpected ways.

407
00:18:09,050 --> 00:18:10,669
And we're still gonna be
friends,

408
00:18:10,700 --> 00:18:13,048
even if we don't all become
professors at Greendale

409
00:18:13,073 --> 00:18:15,018
or open a restaurant together

410
00:18:15,047 --> 00:18:17,682
or move into the same apartment
building after Pierce dies.

411
00:18:19,399 --> 00:18:21,187
Even if we go somewhere,

412
00:18:21,602 --> 00:18:23,636
we're not going anywhere.

413
00:18:23,681 --> 00:18:25,375
Aww.

414
00:18:35,852 --> 00:18:37,142
That was a killer speech, Jeff.

415
00:18:37,172 --> 00:18:38,950
- Oh.
- I didn't say anything.

416
00:18:38,956 --> 00:18:40,319
I literally just walked up.

417
00:18:40,362 --> 00:18:41,645
I know.
I made the speech for you.

418
00:18:41,664 --> 00:18:42,927
It hit all the right notes.

419
00:18:43,015 --> 00:18:44,912
I was trying to hang on to this
moment because I was so afraid

420
00:18:44,950 --> 00:18:46,415
of the future,
but then I realized

421
00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:48,508
all of this
was once the future.

422
00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:50,742
And it was completely different
from what I'd known before.

423
00:18:50,774 --> 00:18:52,302
And it was happening so fast,

424
00:18:52,472 --> 00:18:54,440
but in the end,
or in the now, I guess,

425
00:18:54,671 --> 00:18:55,640
it turned out great.

426
00:18:55,689 --> 00:18:57,323
And just like ice cream,

427
00:18:57,350 --> 00:18:59,118
we've melted together
and made a new...

428
00:18:59,142 --> 00:19:00,874
I just had to run the scenario
to figure it out.

429
00:19:00,911 --> 00:19:01,766
Oh.

430
00:19:01,841 --> 00:19:02,958
Sorry I missed the fountain.

431
00:19:03,013 --> 00:19:03,922
It's okay.

432
00:19:03,953 --> 00:19:05,420
Britta introduced a new rule...

433
00:19:05,565 --> 00:19:06,869
no rules.

434
00:19:07,187 --> 00:19:08,370
Cool.
We can discuss it.

435
00:19:08,399 --> 00:19:09,600
When they were incepting,

436
00:19:09,645 --> 00:19:11,683
I got their balls.

437
00:19:15,114 --> 00:19:17,082
Well, now that we're out
of History of Ice Cream,

438
00:19:17,108 --> 00:19:19,736
I can finally take
"Advanced Claims Denial."

439
00:19:19,769 --> 00:19:21,966
You should take "Forensics."

440
00:19:24,699 --> 00:19:27,738
Can somebody tell me
what the hell we just did?

441
00:19:29,780 --> 00:19:30,738
Jeffrey.

442
00:19:30,761 --> 00:19:32,483
- Jeffrey, wait.
- Dean, what are you...

443
00:19:32,527 --> 00:19:34,778
Oh! You smell like the floor
of a movie theater.

444
00:19:34,827 --> 00:19:36,311
Yeah,
but not for the usual reasons.

445
00:19:36,367 --> 00:19:38,136
I have had the worst day.

446
00:19:38,155 --> 00:19:39,509
Our dance photo
didn't come out,

447
00:19:39,534 --> 00:19:41,212
someone moved my stapler,

448
00:19:41,236 --> 00:19:43,737
and, worst of all, I hurt you.

449
00:19:43,763 --> 00:19:44,852
But you'll be happy to know

450
00:19:44,871 --> 00:19:47,365
that we'll be offering
another History class,

451
00:19:47,646 --> 00:19:49,046
because I care about you.

452
00:19:49,110 --> 00:19:50,848
And not because I found out
if we don't offer

453
00:19:50,866 --> 00:19:53,818
a real History class we'll lose,
like, $40,000 in grant money.

454
00:19:53,861 --> 00:19:55,034
Thank you, Dean.

455
00:19:55,069 --> 00:19:56,537
By the way, you didn't have
to come all this way

456
00:19:56,557 --> 00:19:58,957
- to tell me that.
- Oh, no, it wasn't a problem.

457
00:19:59,231 --> 00:20:00,797
It's on my way.

458
00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:04,464
Please tell me
you're breaking into that condo.

459
00:20:04,496 --> 00:20:06,117
No, I bought it.

460
00:20:06,294 --> 00:20:08,245
Now we'll be
like almost roomies.

461
00:20:08,334 --> 00:20:11,128
Oh, good, you got wine.
I've got friends with benefits.

462
00:20:11,162 --> 00:20:12,125
No subtext.

463
00:20:12,150 --> 00:20:14,836
I don't know why I was
so worried about change.

464
00:20:15,014 --> 00:20:16,462
This year's gonna be great.

465
00:20:16,594 --> 00:20:18,244
I'll be right over.

466
00:20:49,822 --> 00:20:50,988
Are you sure
this is gonna work?

467
00:20:51,033 --> 00:20:52,702
Guaranteed to work.
It's an antic.

468
00:20:53,604 --> 00:20:56,360
Ahh!
Not so fast, you two.

469
00:20:56,386 --> 00:20:58,671
- Get ready to run.
- In these heels?

470
00:21:00,247 --> 00:21:01,675
Where'd you girls
get those dresses?

471
00:21:01,706 --> 00:21:02,925
They're fabulous.

472
00:21:03,437 --> 00:21:04,901
- Mm.
- They're charming.

473
00:21:04,926 --> 00:21:06,382
Oh!

474
00:21:06,425 --> 00:21:08,226
Not so fast, mister.

475
00:21:08,257 --> 00:21:10,838
- Excuse you?
- Excuse me. Thank you, sir.

476
00:21:10,862 --> 00:21:12,924
- Not for you.
- Hello, it's Britta.

477
00:21:12,936 --> 00:21:14,490
Okay, I know a man
when I see one.

478
00:21:14,531 --> 00:21:16,648
Oh, lord, no!

479
00:21:18,561 --> 00:21:24,561
Sync and corrected by Elderfel
www.addic7ed.com
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther