1
00:00:04,923 --> 00:00:07,759
Happy Friday. What are you
doing this weekend?

2
00:00:07,759 --> 00:00:11,429
who am I doing this weekend?
The question is,

3
00:00:11,429 --> 00:00:14,058
he's forgotten. It's nobody.
He's asking because

4
00:00:14,058 --> 00:00:16,560
at the animal hospital.
I'm volunteering

5
00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:17,978
Aw.
Animal hospital?

6
00:00:17,978 --> 00:00:20,271
That makes sense.
The animals are patients.

7
00:00:20,271 --> 00:00:22,149
letting me work off
Dr. Zizmor's

8
00:00:22,149 --> 00:00:23,859
Daniel's surgery.
the cost of

9
00:00:23,859 --> 00:00:25,527
You won't spend money
on a phone,

10
00:00:25,527 --> 00:00:27,654
for your geriatric cat?
but you got Lasik

11
00:00:27,654 --> 00:00:29,656
the one eye, Jeff.
He only has

12
00:00:29,656 --> 00:00:32,159
I can't exactly buy him
a cat monocle, can I?

13
00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:33,577
It's pretentious.

14
00:00:33,577 --> 00:00:36,246
And for your information,
this is a Totorola.

15
00:00:40,084 --> 00:00:42,460
Troy and I will be having
a special Saturday night,

16
00:00:42,460 --> 00:00:45,047
Oh! It came!
as in Dark Knight.

17
00:00:45,047 --> 00:00:48,133
Our limited-edition,
$299 Dark Knight DVD

18
00:00:48,133 --> 00:00:50,844
commentary and autograph,
with bonus footage,

19
00:00:50,844 --> 00:00:53,847
message of up to four words!
including a personalized

20
00:00:53,847 --> 00:00:57,267
"Abed is Batman now,
Christian Bale."

21
00:00:57,267 --> 00:00:59,811
From the man himself.
It's official.

22
00:00:59,811 --> 00:01:01,563
May I have that back?
Thank you.

23
00:01:01,563 --> 00:01:03,565
If you see this lying out,
I'm using it,

24
00:01:03,565 --> 00:01:05,442
so don't take it
and dump it out.

25
00:01:05,442 --> 00:01:06,651
Is this about your noodles?

26
00:01:06,651 --> 00:01:08,612
I didn't say that.

27
00:01:08,612 --> 00:01:09,738
Yeah!

28
00:01:09,738 --> 00:01:12,032
Into your face!

29
00:01:12,032 --> 00:01:13,617
Your tears reveal
your weakness!

30
00:01:13,617 --> 00:01:16,453
What is it with foosball?
They've been at it for weeks.

31
00:01:16,453 --> 00:01:18,914
It's more important over there.
They're European.

32
00:01:18,914 --> 00:01:20,958
Foosball's the soccer
of ping-pong.

33
00:01:20,958 --> 00:01:23,210
I can't take it anymore.
Eats it! Eats it!

34
00:01:23,210 --> 00:01:25,003
Gentlemen,
Let them be.

35
00:01:25,003 --> 00:01:26,713
Clarence Thaddeus Foos.
my name is

36
00:01:26,713 --> 00:01:28,882
Fletcher Morton Foos,
My grandfather,

37
00:01:28,882 --> 00:01:31,093
invented this game
for one purpose,

38
00:01:31,093 --> 00:01:33,386
to have the loudest,
dumbest thing happen.

39
00:01:33,386 --> 00:01:36,640
of foosball is completed.
Now it has. The game

40
00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:38,142
You're free to return

41
00:01:38,142 --> 00:01:40,227
to your hearing-impaired
families.

42
00:01:41,895 --> 00:01:45,565
We'll stop if you can
score a point on us.

43
00:01:45,565 --> 00:01:48,152
Tempting, but then wouldn't I
be playing foosball?

44
00:01:48,152 --> 00:01:52,072
And, if so, how would I not
be a loud, weird knob?

45
00:01:52,072 --> 00:01:55,533
touching the foosenschaften.
Free shot. I'm not even

46
00:01:55,533 --> 00:01:57,953
Sorry, Luftballons.
I'm above it.

47
00:01:59,663 --> 00:02:02,040
Boo-yah!

48
00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:04,042
a word to describe
I wish there was

49
00:02:04,042 --> 00:02:06,586
at viewing misfortune.
the pleasure I feel

50
00:02:06,586 --> 00:02:08,839
It's the face
of a broken man.

51
00:02:08,839 --> 00:02:10,548
Jeff. Smile.

52
00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:12,050
Uh, uh…
Ooh!

53
00:02:12,050 --> 00:02:14,344
They come in a six-pack.
They, uh…

54
00:02:18,265 --> 00:02:21,559
To run out of steam ♪
d Give me the hope

55
00:02:21,559 --> 00:02:24,729
It can be here ♪
d Somebody said

56
00:02:24,729 --> 00:02:28,984
Tied up dead in a year ♪
d We could be roped up

57
00:02:44,624 --> 00:02:46,918
Oh…

58
00:02:46,918 --> 00:02:48,628
Buttered noodles.

59
00:02:51,631 --> 00:02:54,551
I'm allowed to throw out
the dust, right?

60
00:02:54,551 --> 00:02:56,761
Yeah.

61
00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:20,035
What's wrong?

62
00:03:20,035 --> 00:03:23,454
I… I…

63
00:03:26,666 --> 00:03:27,834
Why?

64
00:03:27,834 --> 00:03:29,544
Why?
I stepped on it.

65
00:03:29,544 --> 00:03:32,256
I was dusting the TV.
Why?

66
00:03:32,256 --> 00:03:34,049
I can get a new one
before he gets home.

67
00:03:34,049 --> 00:03:36,843
Oh, sure, Annie. And then
we just have to record

68
00:03:36,843 --> 00:03:39,846
fake exclusive commentary
by Christian Bale.

69
00:03:39,846 --> 00:03:43,183
Go ahead, you first.
This scene was a challenge

70
00:03:43,183 --> 00:03:45,643
Stop it! That's not an option!
to all involved…

71
00:03:45,643 --> 00:03:47,729
is irreplaceably awesome!
The disc

72
00:03:47,729 --> 00:03:49,940
a different disc, and…
What if we got

73
00:03:49,940 --> 00:03:53,443
Know how many sitcoms have
done the "secretly replace

74
00:03:53,443 --> 00:03:56,863
a broken, priceless item"
thing? 'Cause Abed does.

75
00:03:56,863 --> 00:03:58,740
Abed knows everything,

76
00:03:58,740 --> 00:04:00,867
You think you can
think your way out of this

77
00:04:00,867 --> 00:04:05,163
with your thinkiness,
but don't think too much.

78
00:04:05,163 --> 00:04:06,873
You just have to confess.

79
00:04:06,873 --> 00:04:08,458
Okay?
Okay.

80
00:04:17,717 --> 00:04:20,053
We shot this on location…

81
00:04:20,053 --> 00:04:22,139
He's right. Won't work.

82
00:04:27,144 --> 00:04:30,105
What are you doing?
Jeffrey?

83
00:04:30,105 --> 00:04:32,357
Hmm? Oh. You know,
I just thought

84
00:04:32,357 --> 00:04:34,776
next time those Deutsch bags
try to show off,

85
00:04:34,776 --> 00:04:36,653
maybe I can catch them
by surprise.

86
00:04:36,653 --> 00:04:39,072
You don't need to worry
what foreigners think.

87
00:04:39,072 --> 00:04:41,741
That's your birthright
as an American.

88
00:04:41,741 --> 00:04:44,744
Okay.

89
00:04:44,744 --> 00:04:46,997
Small confession.

90
00:04:46,997 --> 00:04:48,457
I used to love foosball.

91
00:04:48,457 --> 00:04:50,583
after-school game
It was a great

92
00:04:50,583 --> 00:04:52,710
for a lonely kid
with no dad.

93
00:04:52,710 --> 00:04:54,129
Just masculine enough

94
00:04:54,129 --> 00:04:56,381
without having to know
how to throw or catch.

95
00:04:56,381 --> 00:04:59,676
I have seen you throw.
And it was fun.

96
00:04:59,676 --> 00:05:03,013
Till I started getting bullied
by people like those Germans.

97
00:05:03,013 --> 00:05:04,389
So I quit.

98
00:05:04,389 --> 00:05:06,891
the right thing.
Well, you did

99
00:05:06,891 --> 00:05:10,645
Foosball is a vile game
for vile people.

100
00:05:10,645 --> 00:05:12,105
You wouldn't get it.

101
00:05:12,105 --> 00:05:14,899
not a fresh-baked-pie thing.
It's a guy thing,

102
00:05:14,899 --> 00:05:18,028
Well, I might get it a little.

103
00:05:33,001 --> 00:05:35,337
You don't know me.

104
00:05:37,964 --> 00:05:42,593
Ho…ly… crap.

105
00:05:42,593 --> 00:05:44,553
I think I figured out
the viewing order.

106
00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:46,597
Original version,
director's cut,

107
00:05:46,597 --> 00:05:49,809
director's cut with commentary,
original version cool-down.

108
00:05:49,809 --> 00:05:53,188
Mm-hm.
Yeah, we'll see.

109
00:05:53,188 --> 00:05:57,359
Oh, my God, you guys.
We've been robbed!

110
00:05:59,319 --> 00:06:04,241
Oh, man. I can't believe
we got robbed.

111
00:06:04,241 --> 00:06:07,160
You have to teach me.
Shirley, Shirley.

112
00:06:07,160 --> 00:06:09,620
those evil power Krauts.
Please, help me beat

113
00:06:09,620 --> 00:06:11,206
Don't you get it, Jeff?

114
00:06:11,206 --> 00:06:14,709
that are good at foosball.
They're not evil people

115
00:06:14,709 --> 00:06:17,837
They are good at foosball
because they're evil.

116
00:06:17,837 --> 00:06:20,298
It's an evil game that
brings out the worst in us,

117
00:06:20,298 --> 00:06:21,716
like out-of-town weddings

118
00:06:21,716 --> 00:06:23,676
where the reception's
in the same place.

119
00:06:23,676 --> 00:06:26,304
Great. After three years
of religious advice

120
00:06:26,304 --> 00:06:27,847
and carb-laden pastries,

121
00:06:27,847 --> 00:06:31,142
you finally have one thing
I actually need, and…

122
00:06:32,269 --> 00:06:33,770
I'm sorry.

123
00:06:33,770 --> 00:06:36,314
Um, that was rude.

124
00:06:36,314 --> 00:06:39,526
so important to me.
It shouldn't be

125
00:06:39,526 --> 00:06:41,652
I'll see you Monday.
I'll, uh…

126
00:06:43,696 --> 00:06:45,031
Jeff…

127
00:06:46,450 --> 00:06:48,993
Tomorrow, dawn,

128
00:06:48,993 --> 00:06:50,245
be in the student lounge.

129
00:06:50,245 --> 00:06:52,330
Shirley, you are the best.

130
00:06:57,877 --> 00:07:00,422
please forgive me.
Dear Lord,

131
00:07:00,422 --> 00:07:02,591
have mercy on him.
And please

132
00:07:02,591 --> 00:07:04,301
The stakes have
never been higher.

133
00:07:04,301 --> 00:07:06,677
I found your YouTube page.
Shut up, Leonard.

134
00:07:06,677 --> 00:07:08,972
in reviewing frozen pizza?
What's the point

135
00:07:08,972 --> 00:07:10,723
You're talking about it.

136
00:07:11,975 --> 00:07:13,643
Well, that is true.

137
00:07:17,688 --> 00:07:20,024
the key to winning foosball
Now, Jeffrey,

138
00:07:20,024 --> 00:07:22,735
is to tap into your darkness,
so promise you won't judge

139
00:07:22,735 --> 00:07:24,571
the side of me
that might come out.

140
00:07:24,571 --> 00:07:27,782
perfectly blunt with you.
Shirley, I'm gonna be

141
00:07:27,782 --> 00:07:29,659
The few times you've been
a little bad

142
00:07:29,659 --> 00:07:31,369
I've liked you most.
are the times

143
00:07:31,369 --> 00:07:33,079
Remember making fun
Really?

144
00:07:33,079 --> 00:07:36,040
of Britta's boyfriend's nipples?
They were tiny.

145
00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:38,042
Remember what you did
to Pierce's hoagie?

146
00:07:38,042 --> 00:07:40,504
That was so disturbing,
I almost proposed.

147
00:07:40,504 --> 00:07:43,590
show me how to dominate.
Now, come on,

148
00:07:43,590 --> 00:07:47,552
hands on the grips.
All right, Winger,

149
00:07:47,552 --> 00:07:51,264
I'm coming up on your
right side in three, two, one!

150
00:07:51,264 --> 00:07:53,808
Know why you can't stop me?
I'm not playing a game.

151
00:07:53,808 --> 00:07:56,144
For you,
it's winning and losing.

152
00:07:56,144 --> 00:07:57,937
it's life and death. Unh!
For me,

153
00:07:57,937 --> 00:08:00,565
That's how I win.
That's where you have to go.

154
00:08:00,565 --> 00:08:03,360
No more thought,
no more feeling.

155
00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:06,237
Kill or be killed. Kill
or be killed, little man.

156
00:08:06,237 --> 00:08:09,240
Think when this mattered, before
you got to be too cool. Unh!

157
00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:10,908
Stop acting like
you're not ashamed.

158
00:08:10,908 --> 00:08:12,910
Follow that shame to the fear.

159
00:08:12,910 --> 00:08:14,912
Follow that fear to the rage.

160
00:08:14,912 --> 00:08:17,332
You put that rage…
Aah!

161
00:08:17,332 --> 00:08:19,709
Up your ass, turkey.
Ha-ha!

162
00:08:19,709 --> 00:08:22,045
There's only two ways
off this table,

163
00:08:22,045 --> 00:08:23,880
kill or be killed. Say it.

164
00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:25,632
Say it, mumbles!
Kill or be killed.

165
00:08:25,632 --> 00:08:27,758
Kill or be killed.
Kill!

166
00:08:27,758 --> 00:08:30,970
Kill! Kill!
Kill! Kill!

167
00:08:30,970 --> 00:08:32,514
Yeah!

168
00:08:34,474 --> 00:08:36,351
You called me turkey.

169
00:08:36,351 --> 00:08:37,561
I love it.

170
00:08:42,232 --> 00:08:45,026
Sorry we couldn't get a car
over here until now.

171
00:08:45,026 --> 00:08:47,362
Our captain was killed
on duty last night.

172
00:08:47,362 --> 00:08:49,155
My God, I'm so sorry.

173
00:08:49,155 --> 00:08:50,490
Yeah. Good man.

174
00:08:50,490 --> 00:08:52,701
Leaves behind two kids
and a pregnant wife.

175
00:08:52,701 --> 00:08:54,785
So you're missing
a Batman DVD?

176
00:08:54,785 --> 00:08:57,581
extended cut wasn't insured.
My Dark Knight extended

177
00:08:57,581 --> 00:09:00,041
No sign of forced entry
on your door or windows.

178
00:09:00,041 --> 00:09:01,626
Sure it wasn't misplaced?

179
00:09:01,626 --> 00:09:04,629
Some of my jewelry's missing.
Someone broke in.

180
00:09:04,629 --> 00:09:06,130
You sure about that, Annie?

181
00:09:06,130 --> 00:09:08,174
Mm-hm. My necklace.

182
00:09:08,174 --> 00:09:09,759
It was gold.
White gold.

183
00:09:09,759 --> 00:09:12,345
And my name engraved in Hebrew.
With emeralds.

184
00:09:12,345 --> 00:09:14,222
It was a bat mitzvah gift
from my nana.

185
00:09:14,222 --> 00:09:16,266
She was a Rockette.
She married a count.

186
00:09:16,266 --> 00:09:18,727
He loved her for her mind.
He was blind.

187
00:09:18,727 --> 00:09:21,145
Good color for the report,
but I got to be honest,

188
00:09:21,145 --> 00:09:23,481
small stuff like this
almost never turns up.

189
00:09:23,481 --> 00:09:26,276
We'll be in touch.
Oh, no, Abed.

190
00:09:26,276 --> 00:09:29,946
You look familiar. Did I pretend
to shoot a guy in front of you

191
00:09:29,946 --> 00:09:31,989
to teach you about gun safety?

192
00:09:34,033 --> 00:09:35,952
I'm really good at faces.

193
00:09:35,952 --> 00:09:38,455
I guess the only upside is

194
00:09:38,455 --> 00:09:40,415
it's brought us closer
as roommates.

195
00:09:40,415 --> 00:09:43,251
Something doesn't add up.
There was no forced entry.

196
00:09:43,251 --> 00:09:45,420
Had to be an inside job.
We don't know that.

197
00:09:45,420 --> 00:09:47,714
pharmaceuticals, laptops,
Instead of taking cash,

198
00:09:47,714 --> 00:09:52,427
they take my Batman DVD and
one piece of ornate jewelry?

199
00:09:52,427 --> 00:09:53,762
It's smoke.
Nana gave it.

200
00:09:53,762 --> 00:09:55,430
It's a ruse, a lie.
Hmm?

201
00:09:55,430 --> 00:09:58,015
what happened here.
I think I know

202
00:09:58,015 --> 00:10:00,893
The landlord did it.
Abed, I…

203
00:10:00,893 --> 00:10:03,854
keys to every apartment, means.
It all makes sense. Rick has

204
00:10:03,854 --> 00:10:06,399
He knows when we're coming
and going, opportunity.

205
00:10:06,399 --> 00:10:09,944
And he dressed as The Joker
for Halloween, motive.

206
00:10:09,944 --> 00:10:12,781
Something's got to be done.
Hmm.

207
00:10:12,781 --> 00:10:14,658
Oh, let's not leap
to thing-doing.

208
00:10:14,658 --> 00:10:16,951
Right, Annie?

209
00:10:21,205 --> 00:10:22,832
Double strike.

210
00:10:22,832 --> 00:10:24,542
Got it.
Back blast.

211
00:10:25,543 --> 00:10:27,337
Boom!
Viper shot.

212
00:10:28,254 --> 00:10:30,548
Nailed it!
Oh, look.

213
00:10:30,548 --> 00:10:32,467
You do like foosball.
How cute.

214
00:10:32,467 --> 00:10:34,719
You just have to practice
with your mama.

215
00:10:34,719 --> 00:10:37,096
What are you doing here?
Shouldn't you be making

216
00:10:37,096 --> 00:10:39,265
weird art movies
or well-engineered cars?

217
00:10:39,265 --> 00:10:40,891
We came to play.
Take that back!

218
00:10:40,891 --> 00:10:43,812
We're using it, strudel-brain.
Get away from our table.

219
00:10:43,812 --> 00:10:45,396
Nice.
Then play us for it.

220
00:10:45,396 --> 00:10:46,731
Monday morning.
Fine.

221
00:10:46,731 --> 00:10:48,692
Only let's make it
interesting.

222
00:10:48,692 --> 00:10:50,610
The losers never use
this table again.

223
00:10:50,610 --> 00:10:53,488
that things have now become
Oh, you are so on

224
00:10:53,488 --> 00:10:55,323
very much like
Donkey Kong.

225
00:10:55,323 --> 00:10:56,825
We're gonna
kick das butt.

226
00:10:56,825 --> 00:10:58,117
Thank you.
Nice.

227
00:10:58,117 --> 00:10:59,786
Enough Teutonic punnery.

228
00:10:59,786 --> 00:11:02,163
Monday morning,
you get this.

229
00:11:06,209 --> 00:11:08,294
Were you guys walking
with a soccer ball

230
00:11:08,294 --> 00:11:10,087
just so you could do that?

231
00:11:11,589 --> 00:11:13,842
They left the ball
and everything.

232
00:11:13,842 --> 00:11:17,679
They were literally walking
around with it like a prop.

233
00:11:17,679 --> 00:11:20,431
That's like a $25 bit,
and it's not even that good.

234
00:11:21,932 --> 00:11:23,601
You have got to come clean.

235
00:11:23,601 --> 00:11:25,894
I don't know what he's doing,
but it feels dramatic.

236
00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:28,398
I'm sure he's moved on
to some other obsession.

237
00:11:30,608 --> 00:11:34,153
Oh, look, fun.
The police are powerless.

238
00:11:34,153 --> 00:11:36,447
I must take justice
into my own hands.

239
00:11:36,447 --> 00:11:39,325
operate above the law.
Men like Rick

240
00:11:39,325 --> 00:11:41,828
But there's something else
above the law.

241
00:11:41,828 --> 00:11:43,120
Bats.

242
00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:44,497
And me.

243
00:11:45,707 --> 00:11:48,167
anything drastic.
Abed, don't do

244
00:11:48,167 --> 00:11:50,587
Maybe we should just
take a step back and…

245
00:11:50,587 --> 00:11:53,297
Aw, is that the grappling hook
I got you for Christmas?

246
00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:54,507
The night beckons.

247
00:11:54,507 --> 00:11:56,593
Its black fingers
curl and uncurl,

248
00:11:56,593 --> 00:11:59,637
going, like, "Hey, come here."

249
00:11:59,637 --> 00:12:02,682
Abed, wait! Wait.
I did it.

250
00:12:02,682 --> 00:12:04,475
I stepped on your DVD,
and it broke,

251
00:12:04,475 --> 00:12:07,520
and I staged a break-in
to cover it up.

252
00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,774
If that were true, you would've
come forward a long time ago.

253
00:12:10,774 --> 00:12:14,026
You're lying to keep me
out of danger.

254
00:12:14,026 --> 00:12:15,695
But there can be no peace

255
00:12:15,695 --> 00:12:18,281
while crime spits and dances
on the grave of justice

256
00:12:18,281 --> 00:12:22,326
to the hot beats and infectious
rhythms of all that is wrong.

257
00:12:25,162 --> 00:12:26,664
Oh!
Just…

258
00:12:26,664 --> 00:12:28,416
Use your foot.
Ooh!

259
00:12:28,416 --> 00:12:31,461
You're okay. Okay.
Ooh!

260
00:12:35,005 --> 00:12:38,217
Troy! What are we gonna do?
Now you're open to input?

261
00:12:38,217 --> 00:12:40,052
I'm following him.

262
00:12:40,052 --> 00:12:43,264
supposed to tone us down.
You moving in here was

263
00:12:44,515 --> 00:12:46,100
So, Shirley, tell me,

264
00:12:46,100 --> 00:12:49,353
your talent ever stop playing?
how does someone with

265
00:12:49,353 --> 00:12:53,149
I don't want to talk about that.
We're like best friends now.

266
00:12:53,149 --> 00:12:55,485
Don't back away from this.
Open up to me.

267
00:12:55,485 --> 00:12:57,821
Okay, well.

268
00:12:57,821 --> 00:13:00,448
When I was a kid,
I had anger, Jeff.

269
00:13:00,448 --> 00:13:04,410
And foosball was a release.
Real bad anger.

270
00:13:04,410 --> 00:13:07,747
But I didn't just beat people.
I broke 'em.

271
00:13:07,747 --> 00:13:10,792
this table over at this YMCA,
One time I was running

272
00:13:10,792 --> 00:13:12,710
and I was really giving it
to this kid,

273
00:13:12,710 --> 00:13:16,130
no offense. He started crying.
this skinny white boy,

274
00:13:16,130 --> 00:13:18,090
They always started crying.

275
00:13:18,090 --> 00:13:20,844
to take it all the way.
This boy made me want

276
00:13:20,844 --> 00:13:23,346
I started jabbing him
with the rods until…

277
00:13:24,388 --> 00:13:26,014
the boy peed himself.

278
00:13:26,014 --> 00:13:27,684
Everybody laughed.
I laughed.

279
00:13:27,684 --> 00:13:31,479
the game lost its flavor.
But after that,

280
00:13:31,479 --> 00:13:33,397
a boy pee his pants,
Once you make

281
00:13:33,397 --> 00:13:36,526
where your life is headed.
you start thinking about

282
00:13:39,153 --> 00:13:41,238
Jeff, what's wrong?

283
00:13:41,238 --> 00:13:44,826
Your ass is mine!
Gonna kill you!

284
00:13:44,826 --> 00:13:48,830
You're such a punk!
You like being beat by a girl?

285
00:13:48,830 --> 00:13:50,790
Yes!

286
00:13:50,790 --> 00:13:54,210
What are you crying for?
Your mama cannot help you,

287
00:13:54,210 --> 00:13:55,920
I know your daddy ain't around,

288
00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:57,714
or you wouldn't play
like a bitch.

289
00:13:59,131 --> 00:14:00,466
Ha!

290
00:14:00,466 --> 00:14:02,176
Ooh!

291
00:14:05,137 --> 00:14:08,599
Oh, my goodness gracious.
Is that what I think?

292
00:14:08,599 --> 00:14:11,477
all the way to tinkletown.
I just beat this kid

293
00:14:13,604 --> 00:14:15,857
Tinkletown. Tinkletown.

294
00:14:15,857 --> 00:14:19,610
Tinkletown.
Tinkletown.

295
00:14:19,610 --> 00:14:22,196
Tinkletown. Tinkletown.

296
00:14:22,196 --> 00:14:23,781
You were Big Cheddar?

297
00:14:23,781 --> 00:14:26,158
Who told you that…

298
00:14:26,158 --> 00:14:27,660
Oh, dear lord.

299
00:14:29,328 --> 00:14:30,705
You're Tinkletown?

300
00:14:30,705 --> 00:14:32,957
Don't call me that!

301
00:14:32,957 --> 00:14:35,668
All your fake sweetness
and religion

302
00:14:35,668 --> 00:14:38,796
is just a veil covering
a horrible monster.

303
00:14:41,591 --> 00:14:44,134
Mountain Dew that day!
And I had a lot of

304
00:14:49,223 --> 00:14:52,476
there's an 80% chance
Sam, Ziggy says

305
00:14:52,476 --> 00:14:55,813
until you bone these hippies.
you can't leave Woodstock

306
00:14:55,813 --> 00:14:57,314
Oh, boy.

307
00:15:15,959 --> 00:15:19,128
You know what I came for,
scum. Where is it?

308
00:15:19,128 --> 00:15:21,297
In the closet, man.
In the closet.

309
00:15:21,297 --> 00:15:23,132
Abed, stop it!
Get him!

310
00:15:23,132 --> 00:15:25,593
They're in the closet.
I mean, stop it.

311
00:15:25,593 --> 00:15:28,721
Just don't hurt me, Batman.
I knew I'd get caught.

312
00:15:28,721 --> 00:15:30,431
Closet.

313
00:15:35,436 --> 00:15:36,938
Women's shoes?

314
00:15:36,938 --> 00:15:40,608
But Rick doesn't have a wife.
Or women's feet.

315
00:15:40,608 --> 00:15:43,653
Wait. My summertime
ballet flats?

316
00:15:43,653 --> 00:15:44,988
I thought I lost these.

317
00:15:44,988 --> 00:15:47,156
Does he have the DVD?
Is it there?

318
00:15:47,156 --> 00:15:49,199
The what?
The DVD.

319
00:15:50,409 --> 00:15:51,869
He has it, all right.

320
00:15:51,869 --> 00:15:53,830
And it looks like
he broke it.

321
00:15:56,457 --> 00:15:58,501
Who are you?

322
00:16:03,714 --> 00:16:05,215
something to say,
If you had

323
00:16:05,215 --> 00:16:07,510
in the text message?
why not put it

324
00:16:07,510 --> 00:16:08,928
I wasn't sure what to say.

325
00:16:10,513 --> 00:16:13,265
you did to me, Big Cheddar?
Do you understand what

326
00:16:13,265 --> 00:16:16,519
Please, don't call me that.
Why not? It's what you are.

327
00:16:16,519 --> 00:16:18,688
A mean, nasty bully.

328
00:16:18,688 --> 00:16:20,606
I was 12 years old.

329
00:16:20,606 --> 00:16:23,609
I had to change schools.
I peed!

330
00:16:23,609 --> 00:16:25,194
I changed everything.

331
00:16:25,194 --> 00:16:27,738
My clothes, my hair,
my personality,

332
00:16:27,738 --> 00:16:28,990
because of you.

333
00:16:28,990 --> 00:16:30,950
What a waste.

334
00:16:30,950 --> 00:16:32,702
I wish I could take
a picture of you

335
00:16:32,702 --> 00:16:34,537
to my 10-year-old self.
and send it

336
00:16:34,537 --> 00:16:35,955
Watch it, Winger.

337
00:16:35,955 --> 00:16:38,082
You don't have a trademark
on self-pity.

338
00:16:38,082 --> 00:16:39,583
I will defend myself.

339
00:16:39,583 --> 00:16:43,587
Good. Bring the cheddar…
Big Cheddar.

340
00:16:43,587 --> 00:16:46,507
I'll put you on the express
train back to tinkletown!

341
00:17:15,870 --> 00:17:18,581
Ah! Die!
Ha! Never!

342
00:17:29,633 --> 00:17:31,844
Argh!

343
00:17:31,844 --> 00:17:34,055
Argh!

344
00:17:34,055 --> 00:17:35,848
Argh!

345
00:17:35,848 --> 00:17:37,266
No, you get it.
You get it.

346
00:17:37,266 --> 00:17:41,311
You need the advantage.
Wrong. Wrong!

347
00:17:41,311 --> 00:17:43,689
Every game I ever won,
I won fairly.

348
00:17:43,689 --> 00:17:47,193
my value. You took that away!
Foosball was how I measured

349
00:17:47,193 --> 00:17:49,486
Try sprouting three feet
Why do think I had to?

350
00:17:49,486 --> 00:17:51,530
just when boys are about
to look at you.

351
00:17:51,530 --> 00:17:54,075
Everyone stopped liking me.
This game is all I had.

352
00:17:54,075 --> 00:17:56,368
It's all I had.
Well, that's stupid.

353
00:17:56,368 --> 00:17:59,038
You're a perfectly
fine person.

354
00:17:59,038 --> 00:18:00,289
So are you.

355
00:18:00,289 --> 00:18:02,499
Thank you.

356
00:18:03,417 --> 00:18:04,752
You're welcome.

357
00:18:08,131 --> 00:18:10,841
I'm sorry, Jeff.

358
00:18:13,261 --> 00:18:16,764
to be sorry for, Shirley.
You don't have anything

359
00:18:16,764 --> 00:18:18,891
Rick has agreed to stay
out of your apartment

360
00:18:18,891 --> 00:18:20,476
as long as you stay
out of his.

361
00:18:20,476 --> 00:18:22,311
I'm getting tired
of saying this.

362
00:18:22,311 --> 00:18:25,606
if you'd invest in a shoe safe.
These things wouldn't happen

363
00:18:25,606 --> 00:18:29,568
That's it? We just live
upstairs from this…

364
00:18:29,568 --> 00:18:31,862
guy that's really
into footwear?

365
00:18:31,862 --> 00:18:34,698
Sweetie, you're a renter.
Look forward to owning a house.

366
00:18:34,698 --> 00:18:37,701
Be glad he's not into heads.
Thanks for your help, officer.

367
00:18:37,701 --> 00:18:41,872
I get out of school around 4:00.
If you should ever need me,

368
00:18:41,872 --> 00:18:45,709
your room, and that's okay?
This guys sleeps outside

369
00:18:45,709 --> 00:18:48,671
One thing I don't understand.

370
00:18:48,671 --> 00:18:50,756
Why would Rick deny
taking my DVD?

371
00:18:50,756 --> 00:18:52,258
And why break it?

372
00:18:52,258 --> 00:18:55,845
Maybe he stepped on it
by accident

373
00:18:55,845 --> 00:18:59,515
really, really bad.
and felt really,

374
00:18:59,515 --> 00:19:01,100
All the more reason
to confess.

375
00:19:01,100 --> 00:19:04,520
Not everybody's perfect, Abed.
Batman. And I am.

376
00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:06,438
Well, Batman,

377
00:19:06,438 --> 00:19:09,317
on behalf of all of us
that aren't perfect,

378
00:19:09,317 --> 00:19:12,444
can I just say I'm sorry
I broke your DVD?

379
00:19:12,444 --> 00:19:14,905
Apology accepted.

380
00:19:14,905 --> 00:19:17,867
I wouldn't mention it to Abed.
That guy's pretty ruthless.

381
00:19:17,867 --> 00:19:20,077
And that's coming
from Batman.

382
00:19:24,581 --> 00:19:26,542
Hey, guys.

383
00:19:26,542 --> 00:19:28,919
have you been?
Abed, where

384
00:19:28,919 --> 00:19:30,338
Troy, really?

385
00:19:30,338 --> 00:19:33,716
Aw, black in the house!
Let it go.

386
00:19:33,716 --> 00:19:37,011
My hand is cramping.
It's fine.

387
00:19:37,011 --> 00:19:38,888
Oh.

388
00:19:38,888 --> 00:19:40,764
Hey, Freudenkatzen.

389
00:19:40,764 --> 00:19:43,684
Ready for your schpankin'?

390
00:19:43,684 --> 00:19:46,979
Let's shut 'em down.
Just like we practiced?

391
00:19:46,979 --> 00:19:50,191
Let's dance, David Bowie.

392
00:20:05,915 --> 00:20:07,499
Get the ball, Karl.

393
00:20:07,499 --> 00:20:09,710
and stop yelling at me.
I'm trying,

394
00:20:09,710 --> 00:20:11,670
Stop being such a Schwein!

395
00:20:11,670 --> 00:20:14,423
We've played enough.
Aren't you playing foosball?

396
00:20:14,423 --> 00:20:16,092
We're gonna go see
a movie.

397
00:20:21,305 --> 00:20:23,015
are those two so close?
Since when

398
00:20:33,192 --> 00:20:36,528
Well, this is
November 29th,

399
00:20:36,528 --> 00:20:38,697
and I'm Leonard,

400
00:20:38,697 --> 00:20:40,157
and today I'm reviewing

401
00:20:40,157 --> 00:20:43,535
Eugenio's Four Cheese
Frozen Pizza.

402
00:20:43,535 --> 00:20:46,080
That's 5.99 at Kroger's.

403
00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:49,333
I've tried it before,
and we'll see.

404
00:20:54,463 --> 00:20:56,257
Mmm!

405
00:20:56,257 --> 00:20:58,342
Mmm, the cheese is good.

406
00:21:00,094 --> 00:21:01,929
The sauce is good too.

407
00:21:01,929 --> 00:21:04,765
It's definitely a buy.

408
00:21:04,765 --> 00:21:07,476
Eugenio's Four Cheese
Frozen Pizza.

409
00:21:07,476 --> 00:21:10,771
See you next time.
A buy.

410
00:21:10,771 --> 00:21:13,607
And you're about to get shot ♪
d I'm as high as hell