1 00:00:02,723 --> 00:00:04,588 I think I'm failing Psychopharmacology. 2 00:00:04,792 --> 00:00:06,191 Why are you taking that? 3 00:00:06,393 --> 00:00:09,794 I thought it was a class about crazy farm animals, okay? 4 00:00:09,997 --> 00:00:11,965 Let's finish the unit. I don't wanna be late for lunch. 5 00:00:12,166 --> 00:00:14,600 Amar is to love, right? 6 00:00:14,802 --> 00:00:18,829 Oh, speaking of love, Shirley, how's it going with the sexy dreadlock guy? 7 00:00:19,039 --> 00:00:21,030 Oh, I'm sure I don't have a chance with him. 8 00:00:21,609 --> 00:00:23,167 Abed and I talked to him by the vending machine. 9 00:00:23,377 --> 00:00:25,777 He asked about you. He specifically asked about me? 10 00:00:25,980 --> 00:00:29,177 When Annie brought you up, he specifically asked, "Who is that?" 11 00:00:29,950 --> 00:00:30,939 Abed. Oh. 12 00:00:31,619 --> 00:00:32,677 What? That's what he said. 13 00:00:32,887 --> 00:00:35,754 Abed, your social skills aren't exactly streets ahead. 14 00:00:35,956 --> 00:00:37,548 You know what I mean? I don't. 15 00:00:37,758 --> 00:00:39,248 You're not alone in this case. Pierce. 16 00:00:39,460 --> 00:00:41,690 Stop trying to coin the phrase, "Streets ahead." 17 00:00:41,896 --> 00:00:44,023 Trying? Ha, ha. 18 00:00:44,231 --> 00:00:46,096 Coined and minted. 19 00:00:46,300 --> 00:00:47,699 Been there, coined that. 20 00:00:48,369 --> 00:00:50,701 "Streets ahead" is verbal wildfire. 21 00:00:50,905 --> 00:00:54,966 Does it just mean cool, or is it supposed to be like miles ahead? 22 00:00:55,509 --> 00:00:57,340 If you have to ask, you're streets behind. 23 00:00:57,545 --> 00:00:59,035 Okay. We can banter if we wanna banter. 24 00:00:59,246 --> 00:01:02,044 But I'm leaving for lunch early. Me too. 25 00:01:02,249 --> 00:01:03,375 Me three. Streets ahead. 26 00:01:03,584 --> 00:01:06,348 Man, you guys really love these stupid chicken fingers, huh? 27 00:01:06,554 --> 00:01:09,682 They're not stupid, they're the only good thing in the cafeteria. 28 00:01:09,890 --> 00:01:11,983 I haven't had one in weeks. They run out so fast. 29 00:01:12,193 --> 00:01:13,785 If God were edible, not that I'm Catholic, 30 00:01:13,994 --> 00:01:16,360 but if it was cool to eat God, he'd be a chicken finger. 31 00:01:16,564 --> 00:01:17,553 Mm-hm. 32 00:01:17,998 --> 00:01:20,057 Well, I wouldn't know. I'm a vegetarian. 33 00:01:20,267 --> 00:01:21,564 Oh, shocker. Yeah. 34 00:01:21,769 --> 00:01:24,499 And if you guys knew how they treated the animals that you're eating, 35 00:01:24,705 --> 00:01:27,765 you'd eat them even faster just to put them out of their misery. 36 00:01:27,975 --> 00:01:30,068 And then you would throw up. 37 00:01:30,778 --> 00:01:33,906 I don't know, maybe I'm feeling extra protective of animals today 38 00:01:34,114 --> 00:01:35,638 because my cat is sick. 39 00:01:35,849 --> 00:01:37,248 Oh, a cat? That's awful. 40 00:01:37,451 --> 00:01:38,611 He has diabetes. 41 00:01:38,819 --> 00:01:40,753 He can't even make it to the litter box. 42 00:01:40,955 --> 00:01:42,422 Chicken run. Whoo! 43 00:01:44,992 --> 00:01:48,359 I'm afraid that I'm gonna have to put her to sleep and... 44 00:01:48,562 --> 00:01:50,086 Mm-hm. 45 00:01:50,297 --> 00:01:51,958 Aw, go on. God bless you. 46 00:01:52,166 --> 00:01:54,896 Save some for me. Watch out. 47 00:02:03,344 --> 00:02:06,074 Oh. I can hear those fingers calling my name. 48 00:02:06,280 --> 00:02:07,838 Troy. Troy, Troy. 49 00:02:08,048 --> 00:02:10,710 Did you get my text message? Did you get my text message? 50 00:02:10,918 --> 00:02:12,317 I think it's... 51 00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:14,210 Hi. 52 00:02:15,823 --> 00:02:19,054 I gotta stop hanging out with her. She sounds like a chicken finger. 53 00:02:19,960 --> 00:02:20,949 Again? 54 00:02:21,161 --> 00:02:24,153 Outrageous. At least apologize. 55 00:02:24,365 --> 00:02:27,391 How can you just stand there like a mute idiot? 56 00:02:30,704 --> 00:02:32,296 Ooh. Well, 57 00:02:32,506 --> 00:02:33,666 throat surgery might humanize you. 58 00:02:33,874 --> 00:02:35,501 But it doesn't make this acceptable. 59 00:02:35,709 --> 00:02:37,404 So cute. 60 00:02:37,611 --> 00:02:39,636 And I don't even normally like dreadlocks. 61 00:02:39,847 --> 00:02:41,610 Hello. 62 00:02:43,384 --> 00:02:45,318 His dreadlocks remind me of the Predator. 63 00:02:45,519 --> 00:02:46,679 Which is weird because 64 00:02:46,887 --> 00:02:49,913 you're doing the actual hunting, and you seem invisible to him. 65 00:02:52,226 --> 00:02:53,591 Abed, you know what I do? 66 00:02:53,794 --> 00:02:55,421 Before I talk, I ask myself: 67 00:02:55,629 --> 00:02:56,789 "What am I about to say? 68 00:02:56,997 --> 00:02:59,363 And how might it affect each person listening?" 69 00:02:59,566 --> 00:03:00,897 I'm really glad you said that, Britta. 70 00:03:01,101 --> 00:03:02,864 The idea that you compulsively filter yourself 71 00:03:03,070 --> 00:03:04,662 makes your lack of flavor kind of a flavor. 72 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:10,867 Sorry, guys, they ran out again. Something's gotta be done. 73 00:03:12,246 --> 00:03:14,441 Oh, I love chicken fingers. 74 00:03:14,648 --> 00:03:16,172 Hey. Oh, you're the man. 75 00:03:17,017 --> 00:03:18,848 What the hell, man? 76 00:03:19,853 --> 00:03:21,616 That's half our problem right there. 77 00:03:21,822 --> 00:03:24,290 Star-Burns works the fryer and skims fingers. 78 00:03:24,491 --> 00:03:25,480 No way. 79 00:03:25,693 --> 00:03:28,924 He gives them to people just so they'll act like he isn't Star-Burns. 80 00:03:29,129 --> 00:03:32,394 Well, I may not eat meat, but I am not gonna eat that injustice. 81 00:03:32,599 --> 00:03:33,588 Let's complain. Yeah. 82 00:03:33,801 --> 00:03:36,531 If we complain, he gets a warning and learns to be sneakier. 83 00:03:36,737 --> 00:03:41,299 I say we knock him out of the kitchen and replace him with one of our own all in one move. 84 00:03:41,508 --> 00:03:42,839 Then we're the ones with the chicken. 85 00:03:43,043 --> 00:03:44,032 It's like a mafia movie. 86 00:03:44,244 --> 00:03:45,472 As far back as I can remember, 87 00:03:45,679 --> 00:03:47,408 I always wanted to be in a mafia movie. 88 00:03:47,614 --> 00:03:49,707 Cool. That's exactly what it's like, Abed. 89 00:03:49,917 --> 00:03:52,909 And you get the most important job. You're gonna be fry cook. 90 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:54,519 We may be watching different mafia movies. 91 00:03:54,722 --> 00:03:56,155 You worked in your dad's restaurant, right? 92 00:03:56,357 --> 00:03:58,757 Well, you'll apply for the job after we get Star-Burns fired. 93 00:03:58,959 --> 00:04:01,086 I don't know. I don't know about the firing. 94 00:04:01,295 --> 00:04:03,923 I think he really relies on that income. Yeah, man. 95 00:04:04,131 --> 00:04:05,792 Every day you flock here like sheep 96 00:04:05,999 --> 00:04:08,832 and wait in line for a broken promise from a dirty system. 97 00:04:09,036 --> 00:04:11,664 Back in those days, Jeff Winger was the guy that made things happen. 98 00:04:11,872 --> 00:04:15,035 He always knew what to say, and he always knew when to slap the table. 99 00:04:15,242 --> 00:04:16,971 You wanna be sheep, keep flocking. 100 00:04:17,177 --> 00:04:19,509 You wanna be wolves, form a pack. 101 00:04:19,913 --> 00:04:21,904 And that was it. It was that simple. 102 00:04:22,116 --> 00:04:24,346 At that moment, we stopped being a family 103 00:04:24,551 --> 00:04:27,179 and started being a family in italics. 104 00:04:28,589 --> 00:04:29,817 Britta got cozy with Star-Burns. 105 00:04:30,023 --> 00:04:31,320 Can I touch both of...? Oh. Yeah. 106 00:04:31,525 --> 00:04:33,390 He lowered his guard. 107 00:04:34,628 --> 00:04:36,289 He was gone. 108 00:04:37,865 --> 00:04:40,231 I mean, the way Jeff saw it, by not respecting us, 109 00:04:40,434 --> 00:04:42,231 Star-Burns had basically brought it on himself. 110 00:04:42,436 --> 00:04:43,733 And when his job opened up, 111 00:04:43,937 --> 00:04:47,703 we did what we had to do to keep the list of applicants to a minimum. 112 00:04:47,908 --> 00:04:50,672 I had worked in my dad's falafel restaurant , so I had a pretty impressive resume. 113 00:04:50,878 --> 00:04:51,867 It's very impressive. 114 00:04:52,079 --> 00:04:55,537 Especially your reference. Just give them a call right now. 115 00:04:55,749 --> 00:04:57,614 But we weren't taking any chances. The fix was in. 116 00:04:59,420 --> 00:05:01,820 Trump Tower, this is Donald. 117 00:05:02,022 --> 00:05:04,388 Well, he can deep-fry the hell out of chicken I can tell you that. 118 00:05:04,591 --> 00:05:08,220 Troy even applied for the same job and gave the world's worst interview. 119 00:05:08,429 --> 00:05:11,091 Just to make me look better, and that was that. 120 00:05:12,499 --> 00:05:15,798 This was the glorious time. No more racing to the cafeteria. No more lines. 121 00:05:16,003 --> 00:05:19,131 To us, lines were for suckers, hacks, sheep. 122 00:05:19,339 --> 00:05:21,307 We were wolves. 123 00:05:21,508 --> 00:05:23,772 And we had the chicken to prove it. 124 00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:28,172 To victory. 125 00:05:28,382 --> 00:05:31,249 It feels unfamiliar, but it tastes like chicken. 126 00:05:34,555 --> 00:05:37,115 Hi. Hello. 127 00:05:37,324 --> 00:05:39,189 You guys are lucky. They're always running out. 128 00:05:39,593 --> 00:05:40,821 Would you like one? 129 00:05:41,295 --> 00:05:45,288 The name's Shirley, memorize it. I will, Shirley. 130 00:05:46,033 --> 00:05:47,364 See that, ladies? 131 00:05:47,568 --> 00:05:49,695 The universe goes by supply and demand. 132 00:05:49,903 --> 00:05:52,599 The more you take and use, the more it sends. 133 00:05:52,806 --> 00:05:54,706 Somebody's been taking a little extra. What's in that container? 134 00:05:54,908 --> 00:05:56,170 Eight fingers. Abed. 135 00:05:56,810 --> 00:05:58,300 Abed's study group. 136 00:05:59,546 --> 00:06:01,980 Why you giving Chang chicken? We have an agreement. 137 00:06:02,182 --> 00:06:04,082 If you get caught skimming, you get fired. 138 00:06:04,284 --> 00:06:08,448 We all go back to eating like Britta. Yeah, we put you in that job. 139 00:06:08,655 --> 00:06:10,714 I dressed like a crazy pharaoh for you, man. 140 00:06:10,924 --> 00:06:12,858 You make the fingers, Abed, not the decisions. 141 00:06:13,293 --> 00:06:14,954 I'm sorry. It's okay, buddy. 142 00:06:15,162 --> 00:06:17,460 But just remember, these things have power. 143 00:06:17,865 --> 00:06:21,164 So just let me know next time you have any more agreements, all right? 144 00:06:21,368 --> 00:06:23,393 Yeah, I agreed to give Chang eight fingers per lunch 145 00:06:23,604 --> 00:06:26,573 in exchange for a 10 percent bump on every Spanish test for each of us. 146 00:06:26,773 --> 00:06:27,865 Oh. 147 00:06:28,075 --> 00:06:30,669 Okay, Abed makes the fingers and the decisions. 148 00:06:30,878 --> 00:06:34,712 Yeah, I'm gonna pass Spanish class. 149 00:06:35,916 --> 00:06:37,850 Oh, Abed, you're the best. 150 00:06:39,686 --> 00:06:42,655 At Greendale, they were always out of chicken fingers. 151 00:06:42,856 --> 00:06:45,051 So whoever could get them had power. 152 00:06:45,259 --> 00:06:47,625 And I the guy was in the apron, so I came up with a system. 153 00:06:47,828 --> 00:06:50,456 And pretty soon half the chicken at Greendale was going out the side door. 154 00:06:52,399 --> 00:06:55,527 Everybody in our crew had a job. T- Bone was the bag man. 155 00:06:55,736 --> 00:06:59,035 He'd move the fingers to a storeroom where two of the girls did the packaging. 156 00:06:59,239 --> 00:07:02,333 We could trust them not to eat the supply because Britta was a vegetarian. 157 00:07:02,543 --> 00:07:05,842 And Shirley figured that if she stole, she'd go to hell. 158 00:07:06,313 --> 00:07:10,374 They'd hand the stuff out the window to Annie. She was the leg man, the distributor. 159 00:07:11,818 --> 00:07:14,582 The crazy thing was, it was their food. 160 00:07:14,788 --> 00:07:18,224 And we were stealing it and giving it back to them like it was a big favor. 161 00:07:18,425 --> 00:07:21,861 Nobody asked any questions, because Pierce's experience as a CEO 162 00:07:22,062 --> 00:07:24,622 had taught him how to keep the wheels from squeaking. 163 00:07:24,831 --> 00:07:26,389 I had it all worked out on a schedule. 164 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:27,589 You know, I've never been fired. 165 00:07:27,801 --> 00:07:29,666 The minute before you thought about busting us, 166 00:07:29,870 --> 00:07:32,031 that was the minute you had chicken in your hand. 167 00:07:32,239 --> 00:07:34,799 It's just insulting that you're eating his chicken fingers 168 00:07:35,008 --> 00:07:36,566 in front of me. 169 00:07:36,910 --> 00:07:39,572 Everyone had their hand out. Everyone wanted what we had. 170 00:07:39,780 --> 00:07:41,111 Oh. Well, here you go. 171 00:07:43,450 --> 00:07:45,077 And Jeff had the most important job of all. 172 00:07:45,285 --> 00:07:47,412 He was at the top. He was the boss. 173 00:07:47,621 --> 00:07:49,418 He was our leader. 174 00:07:49,623 --> 00:07:51,147 What the hell is going on? 175 00:07:51,358 --> 00:07:52,985 AV kids hooked it up. 176 00:07:53,193 --> 00:07:55,423 Abed supplied the whole department with chicken fingers. 177 00:07:55,629 --> 00:07:58,496 You think that's good, check out my posse and Troy's monkey. 178 00:07:58,699 --> 00:08:01,133 Troy, why do you have a monkey? 179 00:08:01,335 --> 00:08:03,166 It's an animal that looks like a dude. 180 00:08:03,370 --> 00:08:04,598 Why don't I have 10 of them? 181 00:08:04,805 --> 00:08:08,263 Guys, look at what Abed scored for me. 182 00:08:09,610 --> 00:08:10,736 It has a million zippers, 183 00:08:10,944 --> 00:08:13,276 and it was free. 184 00:08:16,283 --> 00:08:18,774 Oh, robot. I am a robot. 185 00:08:18,986 --> 00:08:21,352 I am programmed to love this backpack. 186 00:08:21,555 --> 00:08:22,647 This is insane. 187 00:08:22,856 --> 00:08:26,622 More insane than programming them to replace auto workers? 188 00:08:26,827 --> 00:08:27,885 What? 189 00:08:28,095 --> 00:08:31,531 Okay, okay, if you're not in this study group, please... 190 00:08:32,366 --> 00:08:34,425 No, no. That means you, sexy dreadlocks. 191 00:08:34,635 --> 00:08:35,966 Britta's hairdresser. What? 192 00:08:36,169 --> 00:08:39,297 Pierce's hackneyed entourage. Hackneyed? 193 00:08:39,506 --> 00:08:40,530 You see the turban guy? 194 00:08:40,741 --> 00:08:44,336 Yes, in a '90s ski movie that featured an entourage. 195 00:08:44,544 --> 00:08:46,102 Don't you guys think this is getting out of hand? 196 00:08:46,313 --> 00:08:47,302 We're not gonna get caught. 197 00:08:47,514 --> 00:08:48,606 We have campus security on the take. 198 00:08:48,815 --> 00:08:50,305 Abed's got it all figured out. 199 00:08:51,351 --> 00:08:52,443 Well, that's a relief. Yeah. 200 00:08:52,653 --> 00:08:55,781 It's pretty cool being friends with the biggest man on campus. 201 00:08:55,989 --> 00:08:57,854 Isn't that right, Annie's Boobs? 202 00:08:58,358 --> 00:08:59,586 Please rename that thing. 203 00:08:59,793 --> 00:09:01,818 And this time, not with a contest on Twitter. 204 00:09:02,029 --> 00:09:03,894 It's his Twitter account. He can do what he wants. 205 00:09:04,097 --> 00:09:05,689 They are my body parts. 206 00:09:05,899 --> 00:09:08,493 Know what I don't appreciate? I do not consent to this. 207 00:09:08,702 --> 00:09:11,466 You'll be begging for his company. I own that. 208 00:09:11,672 --> 00:09:14,800 I wouldn't threaten a monkey. They have more lactic acid than us. 209 00:09:16,009 --> 00:09:18,671 Shared my chicken with him. Talk to the backpack. 210 00:09:18,879 --> 00:09:21,404 You're the worst, Annie. Streets ahead. 211 00:09:25,352 --> 00:09:27,377 Now, where's he going? 212 00:09:29,990 --> 00:09:32,083 Line starts behind you. Oh, he's cool. 213 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:34,952 Six fingers every Wednesday. 214 00:09:35,162 --> 00:09:37,824 Cool. And what can you offer? I have a bicycle. 215 00:09:38,031 --> 00:09:41,489 And I teach beginner's tennis. Cool, okay. 216 00:09:41,702 --> 00:09:45,468 Six fingers Wednesdays, all right. 217 00:09:45,906 --> 00:09:47,100 We'll be in touch, Janel. 218 00:09:47,307 --> 00:09:49,673 Thank you, Abed. You're welcome. 219 00:09:50,277 --> 00:09:52,040 Hey, Jeff. Hey, buddy. 220 00:09:52,746 --> 00:09:56,182 It's quite a setup you got here. Yeah, I'm pretty excited about it. 221 00:09:56,383 --> 00:09:59,284 It turns out everyone has needs and everyone has functions. 222 00:09:59,786 --> 00:10:01,651 Look, I've been thinking. 223 00:10:01,855 --> 00:10:05,951 Maybe I need to hit the big red button and bring an end to this operation. 224 00:10:06,159 --> 00:10:09,390 I mean, it's been fun, but it's out of control now. 225 00:10:09,596 --> 00:10:11,029 Am I right? I don't know. 226 00:10:11,231 --> 00:10:12,926 The entire campus is controlled by our group. 227 00:10:13,133 --> 00:10:16,899 Our group is controlled by chicken, and the chicken is controlled by me. 228 00:10:17,571 --> 00:10:19,061 Float? I'm good. 229 00:10:19,272 --> 00:10:23,265 Abed, the mafia movie is over. I'm not doing a mafia movie. 230 00:10:23,477 --> 00:10:26,878 In fact, I don't need to use movies or TV shows to talk to people anymore. 231 00:10:27,080 --> 00:10:29,742 Before I only needed them because the day-to-day world made no sense to me. 232 00:10:29,950 --> 00:10:32,475 But now, everyone's speaking the same language, chicken. 233 00:10:32,686 --> 00:10:34,620 I understand people and they finally understand me. 234 00:10:34,821 --> 00:10:37,449 Abed, eventually people are gonna get tired of chicken. 235 00:10:37,657 --> 00:10:38,749 I'm tired of chicken. 236 00:10:38,959 --> 00:10:42,122 You're not tired of chicken. You miss the taste of control. 237 00:10:43,063 --> 00:10:44,394 Well, that's crazy. 238 00:10:46,233 --> 00:10:47,257 Is it? 239 00:10:50,871 --> 00:10:52,668 Unfortunately, the very thing that drove you to this dorm room 240 00:10:52,873 --> 00:10:55,000 is what would prevent you from properly running this machine. 241 00:10:55,208 --> 00:10:57,005 Or even being a cog in it, your ego. 242 00:11:00,814 --> 00:11:04,409 I see. I see, this has been about me the whole time. 243 00:11:06,787 --> 00:11:09,119 You want a shot at the Jeff Winger throne? 244 00:11:09,322 --> 00:11:10,789 You better bring a powerful ass. 245 00:11:11,758 --> 00:11:14,488 Oh, and for your information, I don't have an ego. 246 00:11:14,694 --> 00:11:17,424 My Facebook photo is a landscape. 247 00:11:22,803 --> 00:11:23,997 You're the best, Eduardo. 248 00:11:25,806 --> 00:11:26,932 Thank you all for coming. 249 00:11:27,140 --> 00:11:30,200 Can we make this quick? I need to give a banana to Annie's Boobs. 250 00:11:30,410 --> 00:11:31,968 Abed is drunk with chicken power. 251 00:11:32,179 --> 00:11:34,977 He's gone from lovable Johnny Five to evil HAL. 252 00:11:35,182 --> 00:11:36,649 Hal Holb... Not Hal Holbrook. 253 00:11:36,850 --> 00:11:40,115 What are you saying? You all have to stop working for him. 254 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:43,585 Let this operation dry up and let his wheels spin down. 255 00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:46,725 At which point you would be in charge again, right? 256 00:11:46,927 --> 00:11:48,622 What? This is so sad. 257 00:11:48,829 --> 00:11:51,161 You're jealous of Abed because he's providing for us. 258 00:11:52,365 --> 00:11:55,129 No, I'm concerned about Abed because he won't listen to reason. 259 00:11:55,335 --> 00:11:56,632 Won't listen to your reason. 260 00:11:57,938 --> 00:11:59,530 Why should he? Jeff's so not... 261 00:11:59,739 --> 00:12:01,468 Say, "Streets ahead," and die. 262 00:12:02,709 --> 00:12:04,074 Streets ahead. 263 00:12:04,711 --> 00:12:05,837 You wanna boss me around? 264 00:12:06,046 --> 00:12:08,276 Get me an entourage. Get Troy a monkey. 265 00:12:08,481 --> 00:12:10,472 That's what a real boss does. Yes. 266 00:12:10,684 --> 00:12:13,209 We probably shouldn't even be talking to him without checking with Abed. 267 00:12:13,420 --> 00:12:16,321 I'm already trying him, he's not picking up. What did you do with him? 268 00:12:16,523 --> 00:12:19,492 I don't believe what greedy sellouts you people turned out to be. 269 00:12:19,693 --> 00:12:22,560 I'm not gonna stand and be ignored. Shh. Voicemail. 270 00:12:22,762 --> 00:12:25,526 Hey, Abed, Jeff says you're not listening to him. 271 00:12:25,732 --> 00:12:27,962 Does that mean we shouldn't listen to him either? 272 00:12:28,168 --> 00:12:31,160 Oh, also, should we make special jackets for our crime family? 273 00:12:31,371 --> 00:12:33,703 Like blazers with chicken finger patches. 274 00:12:33,907 --> 00:12:35,534 I don't know, long message, I'm sorry. 275 00:12:35,742 --> 00:12:36,731 That's it. 276 00:12:36,943 --> 00:12:38,240 Oh! Abed. 277 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:41,611 Look, I'm walking out this door right now. 278 00:12:41,815 --> 00:12:43,214 Okay. Okay, bye. 279 00:12:43,416 --> 00:12:44,747 For real. Good. 280 00:12:44,951 --> 00:12:46,885 I'm not gonna look back. Mm-hm. 281 00:12:47,087 --> 00:12:48,782 Goodbye. Goodbye. 282 00:12:48,989 --> 00:12:51,389 Abed. Hi, hi, yeah. 283 00:12:51,591 --> 00:12:53,183 Anybody need anything? Oh, everything, 284 00:12:53,393 --> 00:12:54,382 you look handsome. 285 00:12:54,594 --> 00:12:57,085 I like everything about you now. You get the message? 286 00:12:57,297 --> 00:12:59,891 I want a new hairdresser though. 287 00:13:03,236 --> 00:13:05,534 Hey. Oh. 288 00:13:11,478 --> 00:13:14,606 How's my hair look? Oh. I like this. 289 00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:23,080 Yeah, I got you fired. 290 00:13:23,290 --> 00:13:27,158 You deserved it. Maybe, maybe not. 291 00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:31,262 The question is, what do they deserve? 292 00:13:37,237 --> 00:13:38,226 Key to the kitchen. 293 00:13:38,438 --> 00:13:42,841 There's a valve on the back of the chicken fryer that's not made anymore. 294 00:13:43,043 --> 00:13:46,274 Now, say someone were to remove it. 295 00:13:46,479 --> 00:13:48,106 The fryer wouldn't work. 296 00:13:50,917 --> 00:13:52,942 Forever. How petty do you think I am? 297 00:13:58,825 --> 00:14:01,350 Jeff leaving the family didn't turn out to be a problem. 298 00:14:01,561 --> 00:14:03,961 Okay, I think we're set for the quiz. 299 00:14:04,164 --> 00:14:05,631 Yep. See you guys in class. 300 00:14:05,832 --> 00:14:06,958 Oh, wait, before you go. 301 00:14:07,367 --> 00:14:08,925 Oh, free notebooks. 302 00:14:09,903 --> 00:14:12,599 But the family's success started to go to their heads. 303 00:14:12,806 --> 00:14:15,274 They didn't have college ruled? No, sorry. 304 00:14:15,842 --> 00:14:17,275 It's okay. 305 00:14:22,349 --> 00:14:23,680 Abed? Yeah? 306 00:14:23,883 --> 00:14:25,874 Can I talk to you for a minute? Sure. 307 00:14:26,086 --> 00:14:27,781 We have a situation. 308 00:14:27,988 --> 00:14:29,387 Hey. Who is this? 309 00:14:29,589 --> 00:14:30,578 It's Travis. 310 00:14:30,790 --> 00:14:32,690 You said you wanted someone in your entourage named Travis. 311 00:14:32,892 --> 00:14:34,655 Show him your license. 312 00:14:36,062 --> 00:14:37,495 Travis is his middle name. 313 00:14:37,697 --> 00:14:40,165 I go by Travis. No, you go by the door. 314 00:14:41,634 --> 00:14:43,397 See you, Travis. 315 00:14:46,706 --> 00:14:47,866 Abed? Yep? 316 00:14:48,074 --> 00:14:49,974 No, no, no. 317 00:14:50,643 --> 00:14:52,235 My monkey hates this caviar. 318 00:14:55,915 --> 00:14:57,041 Troy, isn't that...? 319 00:14:57,250 --> 00:15:00,447 They were spoiled, fat, lazy. 320 00:15:00,653 --> 00:15:03,781 I'd given them everything and somehow I'd lost their respect. 321 00:15:03,990 --> 00:15:05,821 So I did the only thing I could think of. 322 00:15:06,026 --> 00:15:08,017 I did what I thought Jeff would do. 323 00:15:08,228 --> 00:15:10,059 I sent them a message. 324 00:15:21,941 --> 00:15:24,239 Somebody's backpack. 325 00:16:04,918 --> 00:16:07,182 These were the bad times. 326 00:16:11,291 --> 00:16:13,054 There he is. Jeff, Jeff. 327 00:16:13,259 --> 00:16:14,248 Jeff. Jeff. 328 00:16:14,461 --> 00:16:16,588 Jeff, Abed killed my backpack. 329 00:16:16,796 --> 00:16:18,320 I caught him stuffing my man full of chicken. 330 00:16:18,531 --> 00:16:20,829 And Tyler Perry has a series of movies about why that's wrong. 331 00:16:21,034 --> 00:16:23,059 That little Arab is off his rocker. 332 00:16:23,269 --> 00:16:26,898 He released Annie's Boobs. Annie's Boobs could be anywhere. Could be... 333 00:16:27,107 --> 00:16:29,473 We got it. The monkey's name is Annie's Boobs. 334 00:16:29,676 --> 00:16:31,644 Look what Abed did to my hair. 335 00:16:31,845 --> 00:16:34,279 I feel terrible for all of you. 336 00:16:34,481 --> 00:16:37,143 Wait, no, I don't, because I warned you about all this. 337 00:16:37,350 --> 00:16:39,818 You were so high on your backpacks and hairstyles, 338 00:16:40,019 --> 00:16:41,919 you accused me of being jealous. 339 00:16:42,122 --> 00:16:43,680 You were right. But what can we do? 340 00:16:43,890 --> 00:16:46,654 I'm sorry, you brushed over that first part. 341 00:16:46,860 --> 00:16:48,191 Together. 342 00:16:48,394 --> 00:16:51,261 You were right. 343 00:16:51,464 --> 00:16:54,126 Now, what you can do is go home and write that on your bathroom mirror. 344 00:16:54,334 --> 00:16:56,495 Wouldn't that make it seem like I was right? 345 00:16:56,703 --> 00:16:58,534 Yeah. I don't have a mirror. 346 00:16:58,738 --> 00:17:00,535 It's not reversed because you're the... 347 00:17:00,740 --> 00:17:03,800 You'd have the mirror behind you. And I would like... 348 00:17:06,412 --> 00:17:10,439 As for Abed, for his sake I guess I'll have to take him out. 349 00:17:11,718 --> 00:17:15,415 Poor little guy. Oh, good, that's nice. 350 00:17:33,273 --> 00:17:34,706 Abed. 351 00:17:36,276 --> 00:17:39,473 What are you doing? Making Tater Tots. 352 00:17:39,679 --> 00:17:42,409 You were right, people got sick of chicken, but I was close. 353 00:17:42,615 --> 00:17:44,082 I just need a new food, a new system. 354 00:17:44,284 --> 00:17:46,479 I'm gonna experiment with jalapeño poppers next, and then Zucchini Zircles. 355 00:17:46,686 --> 00:17:48,654 I don't get it. It's not that complicated, Jeff. 356 00:17:48,855 --> 00:17:50,550 They replaced the C in circle with a Z for zucchini. 357 00:17:50,757 --> 00:17:53,021 No, no, I mean, why are you here? 358 00:17:53,226 --> 00:17:55,160 You said you were close? 359 00:17:58,364 --> 00:17:59,695 What were you close to? 360 00:18:02,235 --> 00:18:03,395 To the group? 361 00:18:05,271 --> 00:18:07,501 To people? Don't do a special episode about me. 362 00:18:07,707 --> 00:18:08,867 Oh. I wouldn't dream of it. 363 00:18:11,377 --> 00:18:13,470 Everyone else needs my help. 364 00:18:13,846 --> 00:18:17,577 That's what people don't get, is that they need to get me. 365 00:18:18,985 --> 00:18:22,978 I just need to be able to connect to people like you can, and then I can make everyone happy. 366 00:18:27,694 --> 00:18:30,959 Do you know why I'm here? You got caught with a fake degree. 367 00:18:31,164 --> 00:18:33,462 By the way, they started using that on Law & Order. 368 00:18:33,666 --> 00:18:35,224 Total rip off. 369 00:18:35,435 --> 00:18:37,903 I'm here to dismantle the fryer. 370 00:18:38,471 --> 00:18:41,065 To cut your power off at its source. 371 00:18:42,642 --> 00:18:43,904 Don't you see what happened? 372 00:18:44,110 --> 00:18:46,840 I manipulated the group into getting you the fry cook job 373 00:18:47,046 --> 00:18:49,105 so I could have some chicken. 374 00:18:49,315 --> 00:18:52,648 And you turned it all into a way to make everyone like you. 375 00:18:53,686 --> 00:18:57,315 Made me ashamed of myself, made me jealous. 376 00:18:57,523 --> 00:18:59,115 Maybe this is a special episode. 377 00:18:59,325 --> 00:19:01,691 It's pretty alarming behavior, Jeff. Yeah. 378 00:19:01,894 --> 00:19:04,829 There's specialists you could talk to. Maybe I should do that. 379 00:19:06,165 --> 00:19:08,497 In the meantime, let's make a deal. 380 00:19:09,435 --> 00:19:12,962 I'll help you connect with people, and you help me do a better job with them. 381 00:19:13,172 --> 00:19:14,730 Like Knight Rider. Exactly. 382 00:19:14,941 --> 00:19:17,102 Like Knight Rider. Deal. 383 00:19:17,777 --> 00:19:20,075 I'll put on a leather jacket and make out with an aerobics instructor. 384 00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:24,410 You pull around front and comedically startle passers-by with your ability to talk. 385 00:19:24,617 --> 00:19:26,983 Maybe we should just stay here and have a plate of chicken fingers. 386 00:19:27,453 --> 00:19:28,852 Cool. 387 00:19:29,289 --> 00:19:31,484 Can we eat them while sitting on a table like in Sixteen Candles? 388 00:19:31,691 --> 00:19:33,022 Pick one reference, Abed. 389 00:19:33,493 --> 00:19:34,755 Sixteen Candles. 390 00:19:36,162 --> 00:19:37,720 And just like that, the mafia movie was over. 391 00:19:37,930 --> 00:19:40,125 I quit the fry cook job, somewhat for the sake of the family, 392 00:19:40,333 --> 00:19:44,201 but mostly for the sake of Jeff's ego, poor guy. 393 00:19:46,105 --> 00:19:47,367 Things went back to normal. 394 00:19:47,573 --> 00:19:49,598 Everyone's back to being a bunch of regular schnooks. 395 00:19:49,809 --> 00:19:51,674 And I'm back to being a weirdo. 396 00:19:51,878 --> 00:19:55,507 Back to watching from the outside for now. 397 00:19:56,049 --> 00:19:58,279 There's still not enough chicken fingers. 398 00:19:58,484 --> 00:20:00,645 No way, no seriously. What? 399 00:20:00,853 --> 00:20:04,550 As soon as our family moved out, a new syndicate moved in to take its place. 400 00:20:04,757 --> 00:20:07,419 But you know what they'll never make a replacement for? 401 00:20:09,362 --> 00:20:10,886 Friends. 402 00:20:12,498 --> 00:20:14,261 Okay, thank you. That's great, Abed. 403 00:20:14,467 --> 00:20:16,697 But could you just answer the question? 404 00:20:16,903 --> 00:20:18,165 What was it? 405 00:20:18,371 --> 00:20:21,363 Do you know who might have stolen a box of hairnets from the kitchen? 406 00:20:21,941 --> 00:20:25,638 Someone with hair. I'm gonna write that down. 407 00:20:29,549 --> 00:20:30,743 Ready? 408 00:20:33,052 --> 00:20:34,644 Oh, that's nice. Never been done. 409 00:20:34,854 --> 00:20:37,414 Here I come. Back up the same staircase. 410 00:20:37,623 --> 00:20:40,057 It's good. Double escalator. 411 00:20:42,195 --> 00:20:45,392 Wow. I haven't seen that before. How did you think of that? 412 00:20:46,466 --> 00:20:48,832 And now for our signature trick. Awesome elevator. 413 00:20:49,035 --> 00:20:50,024 No. I can't do it. 414 00:20:50,236 --> 00:20:51,999 I got babies. I gotta get home. 415 00:20:52,205 --> 00:20:53,672 It's their loss. Yeah. 416 00:21:04,951 --> 00:21:07,317 That was awesome. Yeah.