1
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Ripped & Corrected By mstoll

2
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Unh.

3
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Unh.

4
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Uh, hello?

5
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Hi. Uh, is this the secret mee—

6
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"What errand?

7
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What haste?"

8
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Uh.

9
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Oh, shoot.

10
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Oh! "To Beelzebub with
the Brewer's Knave!"

11
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Ah, Kenneth.

12
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H-hey, Starchy.

13
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Glad you could make it.

14
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I officially call this meeting
of the Veritas Brigade to order.

15
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Lux in tenebris.

16
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Lux in tenebris.

17
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So... anybody have any
weird stuff to report?

18
00:01:11,146 --> 00:01:13,069
Well, sometimes, at night, I

19
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see a shadowy figure around

20
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Princess Bubblegum's tower.

21
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I have a feeling it
might be otherworldly!

22
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Whoa!

23
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This is some
good stuff.

24
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We are this close to finally

25
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exposing the
Princess' shady dealings.

26
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Meanwhile,
PB remains blissfully

27
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unaware up in
her Ivory tower.

28
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Excuse me.

29
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I believe I've made a
startling discovery of my own.

30
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I've developed
this high-tech device.

31
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It broadcasts waves that —

32
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theoretically —
disrupt parallel dimensions!

33
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Whoa, Kenny Boy,
you're blowing my mind.

34
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So... a tinkerer, eh?

35
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Fiddling at the fringes
of unknown realms.

36
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Tell me, Kenneth... will you be
ready when the flames of those

37
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evil places consume
everything you hold dear?

38
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What?

39
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I thought not!

40
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Hey, Peace Master —

41
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Ohh!

42
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Ohh! My noodle.

43
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There is something very wrong

44
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dwelling in
the Candy Kingdom...

45
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a dark entity I plan to
purge from the face of Ooo.

46
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Ho! Uh-oh!

47
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Its presence has
infected every home,

48
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every place of business,
even here in this very room.

49
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Yes, this foul
creature watches

50
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us even... now!

51
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I know you can hear me!

52
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Tonight,
your reign ends,

53
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'cause I am totally
gonna vanquish you!

54
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Whoa!

55
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Holy flippin' flap!

56
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Red alert!

57
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Pep But, start brewing
up some chamomile tea

58
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so I don't stress out!

59
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Aaahhh!

60
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Sorry.
I hate evil so much.

61
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It's all cool,
Peace Master.

62
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Truth sleuths keep it real.

63
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Yes. As lone scouts,
we may fall, but together,

64
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we will stand
as a mighty force!

65
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Oh, dang.
I got to go.

66
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But I shall
return in one hour!

67
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All right,
Peace Master.

68
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We'll be ready.

69
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Mmm! Dill-icious!

70
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Finally.

71
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Uh, sorry about
the wait, guys.

72
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Daddy was pontificating.

73
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Hey, dad, can we go to the
Sorcery and Dark Arts Faire tomorrow?

74
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No, honey.

75
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That stuff is highly
inappropriate for kids.

76
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Daddy works very
hard to protect

77
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you guys from
that kind of stuff.

78
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If you only knew of the

79
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monstrosities that
lurk around every corner!

80
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Dark Arts!

81
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Stop laughing!

82
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You're stressing Daddy out!

83
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Aaah!

84
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See? See what happens when
you mess with the Dark Arts?

85
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I'll get you, dark one!

86
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You wrecked
Peace Master's minivan!

87
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Yo! Red alert!

88
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Oh, shoot.

89
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Right, guys?

90
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Whatcha doin' about it?

91
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Whoa. Be careful about

92
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old-man naptime, please.

93
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That could have been
it for me just now.

94
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What is going on here?

95
00:04:26,967 --> 00:04:28,810
Don't. No!

96
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Hey, watch your pieces, man.

97
00:04:31,555 --> 00:04:34,525
I thought you were gonna whip
these guys into shape, Colonel.

98
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PB, you can't teach
a butterfly to bark.

99
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You know what I'm saying?

100
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Well, they like my stories.

101
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They're good listeners.

102
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It ain't like them
old days with

103
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those hard-nosed
Rattleball boys.

104
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Say, what happened to
them Rattleball boys?

105
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Okay, you guys.

106
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Keep up the good work!

107
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What was your count?

108
00:05:16,934 --> 00:05:18,060
Uh, 3 minutes.

109
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What about you?

110
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Uh, 3 minutes,
30 seconds.

111
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What's that —
your invisible watch?

112
00:05:23,815 --> 00:05:25,943
No, I was just
pointing at my wrist.

113
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Ohhh! 57 seconds.

114
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Oh, dang, we were
both counting fast!

115
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Hey, Rattleballs,
are you sure you're waterproof?

116
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No.

117
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Do you even need
to breathe, Rattleballs?

118
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Continue training!

119
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3, 2, 1...

120
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Hey, Peps,
where's the tea?

121
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Uh, just a second.

122
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Just leave it
out for me.

123
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I'm gonna go find Finn
or Rattleballs

124
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or somebody to run down
this Peace Master bozo.

125
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Okay, take your time.

126
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"Take my time"?

127
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All right.

128
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Oooh-wah-ooooh-wah.

129
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My light will
move in darkness.

130
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I go unseen by
low-level biddies.

131
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Whah-ha!

132
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Yes!

133
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Light of the hermit,
reveal my Nemesis,

134
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and in the folds of Horus,
carry me in haste!

135
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Fold I say!

136
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Yaaaaaaaaaaah!

137
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You going stinkhouse, baby?

138
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Ooh!

139
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Aaaaaaa—

140
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Whomp!

141
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Almost got me, but my lucky
talisman sensed your presence.

142
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Phew! Phew! Phew!

143
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Ha ha!

144
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Aahh! Ohh!

145
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Look here, friends.

146
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The beast lies exposed!

147
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Oh, this is a mistake.

148
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That's my boy
Peppermint Butler.

149
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His powers of darkness
made me go crazy

150
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and crash my
minivan earlier!

151
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You need to chill,
Peace Master.

152
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I'm just a
harmless old butler.

153
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Mm?

154
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Yaaaaaah!

155
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Ohh!

156
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Ugh!

157
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Ha ha ha!

158
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In you go!

159
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You see this?

160
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My dark wizard gobbler poots
evil souls into the void.

161
00:07:36,114 --> 00:07:38,742
You can't do
that to our friend!

162
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Ohh. I see how it is.

163
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Maybe y'all should
get in here, too!

164
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My candy flesh!

165
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:49,961
Digest!

166
00:07:51,838 --> 00:07:53,465
Dimension disruptor,
come on!

167
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Please, please,
please, please!

168
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Hey. What?

169
00:07:57,719 --> 00:07:58,686
Yes!

170
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Aaah!

171
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Impossible!

172
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Time-out.

173
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You can't time-ou—

174
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Whaaa-zah! Whoop!

175
00:08:07,938 --> 00:08:08,939
No!

176
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Your dirty hobo birthday tricks
won't save you long time!

177
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You hear?

178
00:08:16,113 --> 00:08:17,535
You still here?

179
00:08:17,614 --> 00:08:18,866
Uh, no?

180
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I-I don't know. No.

181
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Then hear my challenge!

182
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On the field
of wizard battles,

183
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armed in my
talismans of light,

184
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I will destroy you
and free my children

185
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from the spell you cast

186
00:08:29,751 --> 00:08:31,469
over their minds!

187
00:08:31,545 --> 00:08:33,172
I accept!

188
00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:37,510
See you tomorrow, Butler.

189
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See you tomorrow, Momo.

190
00:08:41,596 --> 00:08:42,643
Tomorrow!

191
00:08:54,818 --> 00:08:57,947
Peppermint Burfer,
show yourself!

192
00:09:04,035 --> 00:09:07,255
Yeah, yeah,
I'm here... Momo.

193
00:09:07,330 --> 00:09:08,923
You're the Momo.

194
00:09:08,999 --> 00:09:12,924
Your spells are no match
for my righteous charm sack.

195
00:09:13,837 --> 00:09:15,180
Dark Arts!

196
00:09:15,255 --> 00:09:16,256
My kids!

197
00:09:16,339 --> 00:09:19,092
You like hunting monsters,
do you?

198
00:09:19,176 --> 00:09:22,851
Lords of the nightosphere,
he must pay a penalty.

199
00:09:22,929 --> 00:09:26,900
Transfigure this babe
into a super weirdie!

200
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Ha!

201
00:09:27,893 --> 00:09:28,894
Noooo!

202
00:09:29,895 --> 00:09:30,896
Barn!

203
00:09:30,979 --> 00:09:33,107
Now you got a monster kid.

204
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Son!

205
00:09:35,150 --> 00:09:37,619
Look, Pappy, dark magic!

206
00:09:37,694 --> 00:09:41,119
Remember, you still got
two non-monster kids.

207
00:09:41,198 --> 00:09:42,745
And if you want to
keep them that way,

208
00:09:42,824 --> 00:09:45,577
you better toss all
your charms down the hole!

209
00:09:45,660 --> 00:09:47,788
I will smite thee!

210
00:09:47,871 --> 00:09:48,997
A'ight.

211
00:09:50,332 --> 00:09:52,255
Whoa, sweet!

212
00:09:52,334 --> 00:09:53,335
Nooo!

213
00:09:54,336 --> 00:09:57,180
All right, all right.

214
00:09:57,255 --> 00:09:58,256
Oh, okay.

215
00:09:58,340 --> 00:10:00,217
All right, you win.

216
00:10:01,259 --> 00:10:05,230
One more thing —
show us your underwear.

217
00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:08,767
You fiend.

218
00:10:09,976 --> 00:10:14,197
Now, um, uh, walk around
like a big chicken.

219
00:10:21,154 --> 00:10:23,907
Now eat some dirt
off the ground.

220
00:10:23,990 --> 00:10:24,832
Please don't make me.

221
00:10:24,908 --> 00:10:25,909
'Ey!

222
00:10:25,992 --> 00:10:28,745
You want three
demon babies?

223
00:10:31,122 --> 00:10:32,248
Okay, stop.

224
00:10:32,332 --> 00:10:33,584
I took it too far.

225
00:10:34,709 --> 00:10:35,585
We're done here.

226
00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:37,046
Run —
run along, children.

227
00:10:38,630 --> 00:10:41,304
Dada, can I go to
the park and eat flies?

228
00:10:43,426 --> 00:10:45,053
Yes?

229
00:10:52,018 --> 00:10:55,397
Princess, I think I got
something on camera 206!

230
00:10:58,900 --> 00:11:01,574
Just look
at that sicko.

231
00:11:01,653 --> 00:11:03,496
Where's Peace Master?

232
00:11:03,572 --> 00:11:06,075
Gah,
I am freakin' out here!

233
00:11:06,157 --> 00:11:08,080
Princess,
your chamomile tea.

234
00:11:08,159 --> 00:11:09,035
Whfff! Thanks.

235
00:11:10,036 --> 00:11:12,255
Well, how do I
check my e-mails on this?

236
00:11:40,525 --> 00:11:42,402
This party is so crazy!

237
00:11:43,700 --> 00:11:47,700
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll