Ripped & Corrected By mstoll
Unh.
Uh, hello?
Hi. Uh, is this the secret mee—
"What errand?
What haste?"
Uh.
Oh, shoot.
Oh! "To Beelzebub with the Brewer's Knave!"
Ah, Kenneth.
H-hey, Starchy.
Glad you could make it.
I officially call this meeting of the Veritas Brigade to order.
Lux in tenebris.
So... anybody have any weird stuff to report?
Well, sometimes, at night, I
see a shadowy figure around
Princess Bubblegum's tower.
I have a feeling it might be otherworldly!
Whoa!
This is some good stuff.
We are this close to finally
exposing the Princess' shady dealings.
Meanwhile, PB remains blissfully
unaware up in her Ivory tower.
Excuse me.
I believe I've made a startling discovery of my own.
I've developed this high-tech device.
It broadcasts waves that —
theoretically — disrupt parallel dimensions!
Whoa, Kenny Boy, you're blowing my mind.
So... a tinkerer, eh?
Fiddling at the fringes of unknown realms.
Tell me, Kenneth... will you be ready when the flames of those
evil places consume everything you hold dear?
What?
I thought not!
Hey, Peace Master —
Ohh!
Ohh! My noodle.
There is something very wrong
dwelling in the Candy Kingdom...
a dark entity I plan to purge from the face of Ooo.
Ho! Uh-oh!
Its presence has infected every home,
every place of business, even here in this very room.
Yes, this foul creature watches
us even... now!
I know you can hear me!
Tonight, your reign ends,
'cause I am totally gonna vanquish you!
Whoa!
Holy flippin' flap!
Red alert!
Pep But, start brewing up some chamomile tea
so I don't stress out!
Aaahhh!
Sorry. I hate evil so much.
It's all cool, Peace Master.
Truth sleuths keep it real.
Yes. As lone scouts, we may fall, but together,
we will stand as a mighty force!
Oh, dang. I got to go.
But I shall return in one hour!
All right, Peace Master.
We'll be ready.
Mmm! Dill-icious!
Finally.
Uh, sorry about the wait, guys.
Daddy was pontificating.
Hey, dad, can we go to the Sorcery and Dark Arts Faire tomorrow?
No, honey.
That stuff is highly inappropriate for kids.
Daddy works very hard to protect
you guys from that kind of stuff.
If you only knew of the
monstrosities that lurk around every corner!
Dark Arts!
Stop laughing!
You're stressing Daddy out!
Aaah!
See? See what happens when you mess with the Dark Arts?
I'll get you, dark one!
You wrecked Peace Master's minivan!
Yo! Red alert!
Oh, shoot.
Right, guys?
Whatcha doin' about it?
Whoa. Be careful about
old-man naptime, please.
That could have been it for me just now.
What is going on here?
Don't. No!
Hey, watch your pieces, man.
I thought you were gonna whip these guys into shape, Colonel.
PB, you can't teach a butterfly to bark.
You know what I'm saying?
Well, they like my stories.
They're good listeners.
It ain't like them old days with
those hard-nosed Rattleball boys.
Say, what happened to them Rattleball boys?
Okay, you guys.
Keep up the good work!
What was your count?
Uh, 3 minutes.
What about you?
Uh, 3 minutes, 30 seconds.
What's that — your invisible watch?
No, I was just pointing at my wrist.
Ohhh! 57 seconds.
Oh, dang, we were both counting fast!
Hey, Rattleballs, are you sure you're waterproof?
No.
Do you even need to breathe, Rattleballs?
Continue training!
3, 2, 1...
Hey, Peps, where's the tea?
Uh, just a second.
Just leave it out for me.
I'm gonna go find Finn or Rattleballs
or somebody to run down this Peace Master bozo.
Okay, take your time.
"Take my time"?
All right.
Oooh-wah-ooooh-wah.
My light will move in darkness.
I go unseen by low-level biddies.
Whah-ha!
Yes!
Light of the hermit, reveal my Nemesis,
and in the folds of Horus, carry me in haste!
Fold I say!
Yaaaaaaaaaaah!
You going stinkhouse, baby?
Ooh!
Aaaaaaa—
Whomp!
Almost got me, but my lucky talisman sensed your presence.
Phew! Phew! Phew!
Ha ha!
Aahh! Ohh!
Look here, friends.
The beast lies exposed!
Oh, this is a mistake.
That's my boy Peppermint Butler.
His powers of darkness made me go crazy
and crash my minivan earlier!
You need to chill, Peace Master.
I'm just a harmless old butler.
Mm?
Yaaaaaah!
Ohh!
Ugh!
Ha ha ha!
In you go!
You see this?
My dark wizard gobbler poots evil souls into the void.
You can't do that to our friend!
Ohh. I see how it is.
Maybe y'all should get in here, too!
My candy flesh!
Digest!
Dimension disruptor, come on!
Please, please, please, please!
Hey. What?
Yes!
Aaah!
Impossible!
Time-out.
You can't time-ou—
Whaaa-zah! Whoop!
No!
Your dirty hobo birthday tricks won't save you long time!
You hear?
You still here?
Uh, no?
I-I don't know. No.
Then hear my challenge!
On the field of wizard battles,
armed in my talismans of light,
I will destroy you and free my children
from the spell you cast
over their minds!
I accept!
See you tomorrow, Butler.
See you tomorrow, Momo.
Tomorrow!
Peppermint Burfer, show yourself!
Yeah, yeah, I'm here... Momo.
You're the Momo.
Your spells are no match for my righteous charm sack.
Dark Arts!
My kids!
You like hunting monsters, do you?
Lords of the nightosphere, he must pay a penalty.
Transfigure this babe into a super weirdie!
Ha!
Noooo!
Barn!
Now you got a monster kid.
Son!
Look, Pappy, dark magic!
Remember, you still got two non-monster kids.
And if you want to keep them that way,
you better toss all your charms down the hole!
I will smite thee!
A'ight.
Whoa, sweet!
Nooo!
All right, all right.
Oh, okay.
All right, you win.
One more thing — show us your underwear.
You fiend.
Now, um, uh, walk around like a big chicken.
Now eat some dirt off the ground.
Please don't make me.
'Ey!
You want three demon babies?
Okay, stop.
I took it too far.
We're done here.
Run — run along, children.
Dada, can I go to the park and eat flies?
Yes?
Princess, I think I got something on camera 206!
Just look at that sicko.
Where's Peace Master?
Gah, I am freakin' out here!
Princess, your chamomile tea.
Whfff! Thanks.
Well, how do I check my e-mails on this?
This party is so crazy!
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll