1
00:00:32,852 --> 00:00:35,150
If I hear another peep,
there's gonna be trouble.

2
00:00:35,221 --> 00:00:36,984
Final warning!

3
00:00:37,056 --> 00:00:39,286
Okay. Go ahead, Beemo.

4
00:00:40,860 --> 00:00:42,794
Okay, welcome back
to the program.

5
00:00:42,862 --> 00:00:44,853
We're talking with my special
guest, Finn the Human.

6
00:00:44,931 --> 00:00:47,229
Hello.

7
00:00:48,501 --> 00:00:50,833
Now, Finn, you were saying
something interesting...

8
00:00:50,903 --> 00:00:52,666
that you're getting out
of the romance biz.

9
00:00:52,739 --> 00:00:54,502
So, what happened?

10
00:00:54,574 --> 00:00:56,542
Well, I don't want
to bore your listeners...

11
00:00:58,378 --> 00:00:59,811
but let's just say
the time has come

12
00:00:59,879 --> 00:01:02,643
to stop dating Princesses
and return to saving 'em.

13
00:01:02,715 --> 00:01:04,410
And you're not just
saying that to, uh,

14
00:01:04,484 --> 00:01:06,452
make yourself seem more
attractive?

15
00:01:06,519 --> 00:01:08,953
Yeah, of course.
No games goin' on here.

16
00:01:09,022 --> 00:01:11,115
Hold on. What's that noise?

17
00:01:11,190 --> 00:01:12,817
I think that someone's
knocking at the door.

18
00:01:12,892 --> 00:01:14,723
- Can you see who it is?
- Yes, Jake.

19
00:01:14,794 --> 00:01:16,819
So it's going pretty
good, huh?

20
00:01:16,896 --> 00:01:19,694
Yeah, but maybe we should stop
talking about this love junk

21
00:01:19,766 --> 00:01:21,757
and get back to
adventuring.

22
00:01:21,834 --> 00:01:24,428
Finn! Jake! I need your help!
It's an emergency!

23
00:01:24,504 --> 00:01:26,335
Now we're talking!

24
00:01:26,406 --> 00:01:28,897
Don't cry, Slime Princess.
We're at your service.

25
00:01:28,975 --> 00:01:30,533
I need Finn to marry me.

26
00:01:32,545 --> 00:01:34,809
I'm sorry, S. P., but
I've given up the dating scene.

27
00:01:34,881 --> 00:01:36,473
You don't understand.

28
00:01:36,549 --> 00:01:38,881
If I don't get a husband,
I'll lose my kingdom.

29
00:01:38,951 --> 00:01:42,250
- I'll do it!
- What did I tell you?

30
00:01:45,391 --> 00:01:47,018
Please let me explain.

31
00:01:47,093 --> 00:01:50,221
Recently, my much hotter
younger sister Blargatha,

32
00:01:50,296 --> 00:01:53,356
married a slime rogue
named Guillermo.

33
00:01:53,433 --> 00:01:55,025
As a result,
Elder Plops decreed

34
00:01:55,101 --> 00:01:56,864
that if I was not married
by tomorrow,

35
00:01:56,936 --> 00:02:00,394
rule of the Slime Kingdom
would pass to my sister,

36
00:02:00,473 --> 00:02:02,202
which I'd be,
like, totally fine with,

37
00:02:02,275 --> 00:02:06,177
except I recently discovered
they are both evil.

38
00:02:06,245 --> 00:02:08,179
Evil to the core!

39
00:02:08,247 --> 00:02:10,010
They plan to militarize
the Kingdom

40
00:02:10,083 --> 00:02:12,847
and begin a campaign of
aggressive conquest,

41
00:02:12,919 --> 00:02:15,012
sacking our neighboring
kingdoms,

42
00:02:15,088 --> 00:02:16,953
stealing their resources,
and eventually

43
00:02:17,023 --> 00:02:20,117
taking over the entire world!

44
00:02:20,193 --> 00:02:21,125
Ew.

45
00:02:21,194 --> 00:02:23,253
Finn, this will happen
unless someone marries me.

46
00:02:23,329 --> 00:02:24,489
No.

47
00:02:24,564 --> 00:02:25,963
Psst!

48
00:02:27,700 --> 00:02:30,260
Please, Finn. I know I've
crushed on you in the past,

49
00:02:30,336 --> 00:02:33,032
but I have no intention
of locking this down.

50
00:02:33,106 --> 00:02:35,233
Our marriage will be
in name only.

51
00:02:35,308 --> 00:02:36,570
Mm...

52
00:02:40,813 --> 00:02:42,440
Wait! I'm coming,
too!

53
00:02:42,515 --> 00:02:46,110
I'm gonna eat popcorn
and make hilarious jokes.

54
00:02:46,185 --> 00:02:48,380
Aw. Who ate
all my popcorn?

55
00:02:48,454 --> 00:02:50,388
Call this a room?

56
00:02:50,456 --> 00:02:51,718
There's not even a window.

57
00:02:51,791 --> 00:02:53,452
Oh, wait. Are we rolling?

58
00:02:55,361 --> 00:02:57,386
How much farther?

59
00:02:57,463 --> 00:03:02,093
This popcorn's not gonna
last all day.

60
00:03:02,168 --> 00:03:03,635
All right, now it might.

61
00:03:03,703 --> 00:03:04,727
We're here.

62
00:03:04,804 --> 00:03:07,398
Welcome to my little oasis
in the wasteland.

63
00:03:07,473 --> 00:03:10,874
Oasis? More like, "No way, sis!"

64
00:03:14,147 --> 00:03:15,512
Huh?

65
00:03:20,186 --> 00:03:23,178
Whoa! This is amazing!

66
00:03:25,858 --> 00:03:26,882
You okay, buddy?

67
00:03:26,959 --> 00:03:30,417
You could say I got out of there
in the "lick" of time.

68
00:03:30,496 --> 00:03:31,690
Zing!

69
00:03:31,764 --> 00:03:34,358
Quickly. We're already late.

70
00:03:35,701 --> 00:03:37,669
This is the
most important place in the Kingdom.

71
00:03:37,737 --> 00:03:38,999
The Royal Palace?

72
00:03:39,071 --> 00:03:41,437
No, it's where me and all
my main splirts hang out.

73
00:03:41,507 --> 00:03:42,633
Hi, girls!

74
00:03:42,708 --> 00:03:44,232
H-i-i-i-i-i!

75
00:03:45,378 --> 00:03:47,972
Tree Trunks and Mr. Pig,
what are you doing here?

76
00:03:48,047 --> 00:03:51,983
Oh, we always come here when
we want to shake it, Finn.

77
00:03:52,051 --> 00:03:55,316
It's the only
triple-cray-rated disco

78
00:03:55,388 --> 00:03:57,583
in all of Ooo.

79
00:04:00,460 --> 00:04:02,087
Get your face pretty, Finn.

80
00:04:02,161 --> 00:04:05,153
My people are already
assembled in the courtyard.

81
00:04:06,766 --> 00:04:10,896
Greetings, loyal slimejects!

82
00:04:12,638 --> 00:04:14,401
I would like to introduce
my new husband...

83
00:04:14,474 --> 00:04:16,806
Finn the Human!

84
00:04:19,645 --> 00:04:21,510
What did I tell you?
Piece of cake.

85
00:04:21,581 --> 00:04:24,641
Attention, my loyal slimejects.

86
00:04:24,717 --> 00:04:26,309
It's Blargatha.

87
00:04:26,385 --> 00:04:28,250
And that's the mysterious
Guillermo.

88
00:04:28,321 --> 00:04:31,313
He hails from a faraway, much
more somber Slime Kingdom

89
00:04:31,390 --> 00:04:33,085
where people have
strange customs

90
00:04:33,159 --> 00:04:35,024
and no love in their eyes.

91
00:04:35,094 --> 00:04:37,619
Their discos aren't even
rated one cray.

92
00:04:37,697 --> 00:04:41,133
My husband would like to say
something.

93
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:42,963
And, uh, he would, too,

94
00:04:43,035 --> 00:04:44,832
if not for his extremely
sore throat,

95
00:04:44,904 --> 00:04:47,134
so I will say it for him.

96
00:04:47,206 --> 00:04:50,835
We challenge you
to the Trials of Glarb.

97
00:04:52,278 --> 00:04:53,677
I object!

98
00:04:53,746 --> 00:04:56,408
Ancient traditions
such as the Trials of Glarb

99
00:04:56,482 --> 00:05:00,179
are no longer relevant in our
modern self-indulgent society.

100
00:05:00,253 --> 00:05:03,689
Order! Order! I demand order!

101
00:05:03,756 --> 00:05:05,383
I, Elder Plops,

102
00:05:05,458 --> 00:05:07,050
being the coolest guy
in the room,

103
00:05:07,126 --> 00:05:08,821
will settle this dispute.

104
00:05:08,895 --> 00:05:11,056
The matter will be settled on
the battleground...

105
00:05:11,130 --> 00:05:12,028
All right!

106
00:05:12,098 --> 00:05:15,067
the battleground of love.
- Aw!

107
00:05:15,134 --> 00:05:17,568
The couple that I deem
most truly in love

108
00:05:17,637 --> 00:05:19,400
shall rule the Slime Kingdom
for life.

109
00:05:19,472 --> 00:05:21,201
Plops out.

110
00:05:24,010 --> 00:05:26,274
This is, like,
the opposite of what you wanted.

111
00:05:26,345 --> 00:05:29,314
Welcome, everyone to the Trials of Glarb,

112
00:05:29,382 --> 00:05:31,646
hosted by me, Elder Plops.

113
00:05:31,717 --> 00:05:33,981
The first trial will be
crooning.

114
00:05:34,053 --> 00:05:35,987
You guys are gonna get into
these sweet boats I made

115
00:05:36,055 --> 00:05:38,615
and croon for each other
on the lake.

116
00:05:38,691 --> 00:05:40,488
The most loving
and heartfelt song,

117
00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:43,825
judged by me, Elder Plops,
will win.

118
00:05:46,232 --> 00:05:48,393
I really want to hear some
emotional song work here.

119
00:05:48,467 --> 00:05:49,832
The people want to hear
emotional stuff.

120
00:05:49,902 --> 00:05:52,666
So let's see some stuff,
all right?

121
00:05:54,807 --> 00:05:56,399
Okay, Finn, you can do it.

122
00:05:56,475 --> 00:05:59,467
I don't know. I'm still
jacked up over my lady biz.

123
00:05:59,545 --> 00:06:01,843
Well, just lose yourself
in your own mind

124
00:06:01,914 --> 00:06:03,575
and go numb.

125
00:06:03,649 --> 00:06:05,310
Then let it all out.

126
00:06:07,086 --> 00:06:09,611
Okay.

127
00:06:09,689 --> 00:06:12,180
Just let it all out.

128
00:06:53,766 --> 00:06:55,859
Why can't I get over you?

129
00:06:55,935 --> 00:06:57,266
Finn, way to go.

130
00:06:57,336 --> 00:06:58,735
I could tell the people were
really impressed.

131
00:06:58,804 --> 00:07:00,135
Guillermo, you're up.

132
00:07:00,206 --> 00:07:02,640
Hmm? Okay, Guillermo.
I'll ask, I'll ask...

133
00:07:02,708 --> 00:07:05,336
Guillermo still
has a sore throat!

134
00:07:05,411 --> 00:07:07,242
May I sing on, uh, his behalf?

135
00:07:07,313 --> 00:07:09,338
Elder Plops thinks
that's okay.

136
00:07:23,195 --> 00:07:24,924
I'm done!

137
00:07:24,997 --> 00:07:27,830
As Elder Plops, I have heard
many songs in my life,

138
00:07:27,900 --> 00:07:30,562
and I can only say this...

139
00:07:30,636 --> 00:07:31,728
Finn, you win this one.

140
00:07:34,607 --> 00:07:36,234
- Whoo!
- Yes!

141
00:07:39,078 --> 00:07:42,241
Welcome, everyone,
to our second trial...

142
00:07:42,314 --> 00:07:43,679
spooning.

143
00:07:43,749 --> 00:07:45,683
When I say go, the big spoon
will put his arm

144
00:07:45,751 --> 00:07:47,548
around the little spoon
and cuddle.

145
00:07:47,620 --> 00:07:49,554
I will be watching you spoon,

146
00:07:49,622 --> 00:07:51,522
measuring and assessing
your love

147
00:07:51,590 --> 00:07:53,785
by posture and overall
vibe.

148
00:07:53,859 --> 00:07:56,521
The best cuddle,
or spoon, wins.

149
00:07:56,595 --> 00:07:58,586
Wait. What?

150
00:07:58,664 --> 00:08:02,498
Spooners, get in your
futons.

151
00:08:02,568 --> 00:08:04,729
Uh, I don't feel good
about this.

152
00:08:04,804 --> 00:08:07,500
Ready, set...

153
00:08:07,573 --> 00:08:10,064
spoon!

154
00:08:10,142 --> 00:08:11,803
No, wait.
I don't want to do this!

155
00:08:11,877 --> 00:08:13,469
Wrap those gorgeous pythons
around me!

156
00:08:13,546 --> 00:08:15,173
No! This feels weird!

157
00:08:15,247 --> 00:08:17,238
Come on, Finn, they're
crushing us!

158
00:08:17,316 --> 00:08:19,375
Wuh! Wuh! Wuh!

159
00:08:19,452 --> 00:08:21,886
Blargatha and Guillermo,
very nice.

160
00:08:21,954 --> 00:08:25,151
Nooooooooooooooooo!

161
00:08:25,224 --> 00:08:26,555
Yeesh.
All right, everyone, stop.

162
00:08:26,625 --> 00:08:28,058
I've seen enough.

163
00:08:28,127 --> 00:08:30,391
Blargatha and Guillermo's love
was way-off-the-charts good.

164
00:08:30,463 --> 00:08:32,226
They win.
- Yes!

165
00:08:32,298 --> 00:08:34,129
I love you, baby.
You spoon so good!

166
00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:35,599
No!

167
00:08:35,668 --> 00:08:37,533
The score is tied.

168
00:08:37,603 --> 00:08:39,969
There's one more trial after
spooning and crooning...

169
00:08:40,039 --> 00:08:41,563
smooching.

170
00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:43,574
I'm sorry it doesn't rhyme
with crooning and spooning.

171
00:08:43,642 --> 00:08:45,610
We will begin our next trial
on the morrow!

172
00:08:45,678 --> 00:08:47,475
This is not going well.

173
00:08:47,546 --> 00:08:49,138
I'm sorry,
Slime Princess.

174
00:08:49,215 --> 00:08:51,410
I'm just going to mess
this next trial up.

175
00:08:51,484 --> 00:08:53,543
Is it because you haven't
done much kissing?

176
00:08:53,619 --> 00:08:56,179
You don't have to be embarrassed
by your innocence.

177
00:08:56,255 --> 00:08:58,485
Pretending to be in love
is making me sad.

178
00:08:58,557 --> 00:09:00,821
It makes me think about
Flame Princess.

179
00:09:00,893 --> 00:09:02,861
What if I pretend to be
your ex?

180
00:09:02,928 --> 00:09:04,122
That's worse, I think.

181
00:09:04,196 --> 00:09:06,130
Well, it looks like I'm
losing my kingdom

182
00:09:06,198 --> 00:09:07,460
to the forces of evil.

183
00:09:07,533 --> 00:09:09,467
No, Slime Princess.

184
00:09:09,535 --> 00:09:11,332
Let's practice this smooch.

185
00:09:14,240 --> 00:09:15,434
Mmmmm.

186
00:09:17,209 --> 00:09:20,269
I'm sorry.
I... I can't!

187
00:09:20,346 --> 00:09:22,041
Bunk this!

188
00:09:22,114 --> 00:09:23,672
Wait! Where are you going?

189
00:09:23,749 --> 00:09:25,808
I'm going to punch
Guillermo in his stupid face

190
00:09:25,885 --> 00:09:27,216
'til he agrees to leave
the kingdom.

191
00:09:27,286 --> 00:09:29,151
I want to come!

192
00:09:33,526 --> 00:09:35,721
Hey, Guillermo!
Can you come out here for a...

193
00:09:35,795 --> 00:09:37,319
quick meeting?

194
00:09:37,396 --> 00:09:40,058
More like a quick beating.
Hey-o!

195
00:09:40,132 --> 00:09:42,965
He says eat a fat dollop
and buzz off!

196
00:09:44,136 --> 00:09:46,696
Blargatha!

197
00:09:46,772 --> 00:09:49,639
Hyup!

198
00:09:49,708 --> 00:09:51,175
Hmm.

199
00:09:54,113 --> 00:09:58,243
Finn, you shouldn't
break in to a woman's room.

200
00:09:58,317 --> 00:10:00,217
Hyah! Hyah!

201
00:10:00,286 --> 00:10:01,150
Everyone okay?

202
00:10:01,220 --> 00:10:03,017
Yes. "Tank" you.

203
00:10:06,392 --> 00:10:08,360
Hyah!

204
00:10:08,427 --> 00:10:09,223
Eh?

205
00:10:09,295 --> 00:10:10,956
Guillermo!

206
00:10:11,030 --> 00:10:12,190
Hyah!

207
00:10:12,264 --> 00:10:15,358
Are you dead, man?

208
00:10:15,434 --> 00:10:17,026
Aw, geez, bro.

209
00:10:17,102 --> 00:10:19,070
Huh?
These are olives.

210
00:10:19,138 --> 00:10:20,002
Uh-oh.

211
00:10:20,072 --> 00:10:22,302
Blargatha, why would you
make a fake husband?

212
00:10:22,374 --> 00:10:24,774
You're so hot!

213
00:10:24,844 --> 00:10:27,108
You don't know how hard
it is to be this hot.

214
00:10:27,179 --> 00:10:29,147
Women don't want to talk to you
because they're intimidated,

215
00:10:29,215 --> 00:10:32,013
and guys won't talk to you
because they're too scared.

216
00:10:32,084 --> 00:10:35,383
You're alone in the hottest,
most sexiest prison.

217
00:10:35,454 --> 00:10:37,115
So I stuck some olives
on a glop of gelatin

218
00:10:37,189 --> 00:10:38,713
and called him
my lover.

219
00:10:38,791 --> 00:10:40,224
Well, I'm sorry, Blargatha,

220
00:10:40,292 --> 00:10:41,589
but you're going to have
to spend more time

221
00:10:41,660 --> 00:10:43,651
in your metaphorical prison
in a real prison,

222
00:10:43,729 --> 00:10:45,492
'cause what you're doing
is illegal.

223
00:10:45,564 --> 00:10:48,465
Uh, no, it just disqualifies
her from challenging me.

224
00:10:48,534 --> 00:10:49,660
Whoops.

225
00:10:51,637 --> 00:10:54,401
By the authority
of Elder Plops,

226
00:10:54,473 --> 00:10:56,065
I officially declare...

227
00:10:56,141 --> 00:10:57,904
you are still
the Slime Princess.

228
00:10:57,977 --> 00:10:59,945
Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!

229
00:11:00,012 --> 00:11:01,775
Finn, what do you think?

230
00:11:01,847 --> 00:11:04,145
I don't want to
disappoint all these people.

231
00:11:07,353 --> 00:11:08,820
I'm sorry! I can't do it!

232
00:11:40,452 --> 00:11:47,443
- This party is so crazy!
- Ripped By mstoll